Sharp. Yes: upon my honour, Mr Cook, the company is in the next room, and must have gone without, had not you brought it. I'll draw a table. I see you have brought a cloth with you; but you need not have done that, for we have a pretty good stock of linen-at the pawnbrokers. [Aside.

[Exit, and returns immediately, drawing a table.] Come, come, my boys, be quick, the company began to be very uneasy; but I knew my old friend, Lick-spit here would not fail us.

Cook. Lick-spit! I am no friend of yours; so I desire less familiarity; lick-spit too!

Enter GAYLESS, and stares.

Gayl. What is all this?

Sharp. Sir, if the sight of the supper is offensive, I can easily have it removed. [Aside to Gayless.,

Gayl. Prithee explain thyself, Sharp.

Sharp. Some of our neighbours, I suppose have bespoke this supper; but the cook has drank away his memory, forgot the house, and brought it here; however,. Sir, if you dislike it, I'll tell him of his mistake, and send him about his business.

Gayl. Hold, hold, necessity obliges me against my inclination to favour the cheat, and feast at my neighbour's

expence.

Cook. Hank you, friend, is that your master?

Sharp. Ay, and the best master in the world.

Cook. I'll speak to him then-Sir, I have according to your commands, dress'd as genteel a supper as my art and your price would admit of

Sharp. Good again, Sir, 'tis paid for. [Aside to Gayless.. Gayl. I don't in the least question your abilities, Mr Cook, and I am obliged to you for your care.

Cook. Sir, you are a gentleman;and if you would look over the bill and approve it (pulls out a bill) you wil over and above return the obligation.

Sharp. Oh the devil!

Gayl. (looking on a bill.) Very well, I'll send my man to pay you to-morrow.

Cook. I'll spare him that trouble, and take it with me, Sir-I never work but for ready money..

Gayl. Hah?

Sharp. Then you won't have our custom. [Aside.] My master is busy now, friend; do you think he won't pay you?

Cook. No matter what I think; either my meat or my money.

Sharp.' 'Twill be very ill-convenient for him to pay you to-night.

Cook, Then I'm afraid it will be ill-convenient to pay me to-morrow; so d'ye hear

Enter MELISSA.

Gayl. Prithee be advis'd, s'death I shall be discover'd.
[Takes the cook aside.

my

master's ex

Mel. (to Sharp.) What's the matter? Sharp. The cook has not quite answer'd pectations about the supper, Sir, and he's a little angry at him, that's all.

Mel. Come, come, Mr Gayless, don't be uneasy, a batchelor cannot be supposed to have things in the utmost regularity; we don't expect it.

Cook. But I do expect, and will have it.

Mel. What does that drunken fool say?

Cook. That I will have my money, and I won't stay till ' to-morrow-and, and

Sharp. (runs and steps his mouth.) Hold, hold, what are you doing? Are you, mad?

Mel. What do you stop the man's breath for?

Sharp. Sir, he was going to call you names.--Don't be abusive, Cook; the gentleman is a man of honour, and said nothing to you; pray be pacify'd, you are in liquor.

Sparp. (bolding still.) Why, I tell you, fool, you mistake the gentleman, he is a friend of my master's, and has not said a word to you. Pray, good Sir, go into the 'next room; the fellow's drunk, and takes you for another. You'll repent this when you are sober, friend-Pray, Sir, don't stay to hear his impertinence.

Gayl. Pray, Sir, walk in--he's below your anger.

Mel. Damn the rascal! what does he mean by affronting me!-Let the scoundrel go, I'll polish his brutality, I warrant you; here's the best reformers of manners in the univese. [Draws his sword.). Let him go, I sav.

Sharp. So, so you have done finely, now-Get away as

fast

fast as you can; he's the most courageous mettlesome young man in all England-Why, if his passion was up, he could eat you.-Make your escape, you fool!

Cook. I won't.

of digestion tho'

-Eat me! He'll find me damn'd hard

Sharp. Prithee come here; let me speak with you.

Enter KITTY.

[They walk aside.

-Sir

Kit. Gad's me, is the supper on table already ?pray defer it for a few moments; my mistress is better, and will be here immediately.

Gayl. Will she indeed! Bless me-I did not expectbut however Sharp ?

Kit. What success, Madam ?

[Aside to Melissa. Mel. As we could wish, girl--but he is in such pain and. perplexity, I can't hold it out much longer.

Kit. Ay, that not holding out, is the ruin of half our sex. Sharp. I have pacify'd the cook, and if you can but borrow twenty pieces of that young prig, all may go well yet; you may succeed though I could not: remember wh told you about it straight, Sir,

Gayl. Sir, Sir, (to Melissa) I beg to speak a word with you; my servant, Sir. telis me he has had the mintstone, Sir, to lose a note of mine, of twenty pounds, which I sent him to receive,—and the bankers shops being shut up, and having very little cash by me, I should be much obliged to you if you would favour me with twenty pieces till to

morrow.

Mel. Oh Sir, with all my heart, (Taking out her purse.) and as I have a small favour to beg of you, Sir, the obliga tion will be mutual.

Gayl. How may I oblige you, Sir?

Mel. You are to be marry'd, I hear, to Melissa.

Gayi. To morrow, Sir..

Mel. Then you'll oblige me, Sir, by never seeing her again.

Gayl. Do you call this a small favour, Sir.

Mel. A mere trifle, Sir-breaking of contracts, suing for divorces, committing adultery, and such like, are all reckon'd trifles now-a-days; and smart young fellows, like you and myself, Gayless, should be never out of fashion.

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Gay!

Gayl. But pray, Sir, how are you concern'd in this affair!

Mel. Oh Sir, you must know I have a very great regard for Melissa, and indeed, she for me; and by the by, I have a most despicable opinion of you; for, entre nous, I take you, Charles to be a very great scoundrel.

Gayl. Sir!

Mel. Nay, don't look fierce, Sir! and give yourself airs -Damme, Sir, I shall be thro' your body else in the snapping of a finger.

Gayl. I'll be as quick as you, villain!

[Draws and makes at Melissa. Kit. Hold, hold, murder! you'll kill my mistress-the

young gentleman I mean.

Gayl. Ah! her mistress!

[Drops his sword. Sharp. How! Melissa! nay, then drive away care—All's

over now.

Enter all the COMPANY laughing.

Gad. What, Mr Gayless, engaging with Melissa before your time. Ha, ha, ha!

Kil. Your humble servant, good Mr Politician (to Sharp.) This is genih men, and ladies, the most celebrated and ingenious Timothy Sharp, Schemer-general and regenbuah squire to the most renowned and fortunate adventurer Charles Gayless, knight of the woeful countenance; Ha, ha, ha!-Oh that dismal face, and more dismal head of yours. [Strikes Sharp upon the head. Sharp. 'Tis cruel in you to disturb a man in his last agenics.

Mel. Now, Mr Gayless !-what, not a word! you are scusible I can be no stranger to your misfortunes, and I might reasonably expect an excuse for your ill treatment

of me.

Gayl.. No, madam, silence is my only refuge; for to endeavour to vindicate my crimes would show a greater want of virtue than even the commission of them.

Mel. Oh, Gayless! 'twas poor to impose upon a woman and one that lov'd you too.

Gayl. Oh most unpardonable: but my necessities Sharp. And mine, madam were not to be match'd, I'm sure, of this side starving.

Your ne

Mel. His tears have softened me at oncecessities Mr Gayless, with such real contrition are too

powerful

powerful motives not to affect the breast already prejudic'd in your favourYou have suffer'd too much already for your extravagance; and as I take a part of your sufferings, 'tis easing myself to relieve you; know therefore, all that's past I freely forgive.

Gayl. You cannot mean it sure; I am lost in wonder.

Mel. Prepare yourself for more wonder-You have a-nother friend in masquerade here; Mr Cook pray throw aside your drunkenness, and make your sober appearance -Don't you know that face, Sir?

Cook. Ay, master, what have you forgot your friend Dick, as you used to call me?

Gayl. More wonder indeed! don't you live with my father?

Mel. Just after your hopeful servant there had left me, comes this man from Sir William with a letter to me; upon which (being by that wholly convinced of your necessitous condition) I invented by the help of Kitty and Mrs Gadabout, this little plot, in which your friend Dick there has acted miracles, resolving to teaze you a little, that you might have a greater relish for a happy turn in your affairs. Now, Sir, read that letter, and compleat your joy.

Gayl. [reads.] Madam, I am father to that unfortunate young man whom I hear by a friend of mine (that by my desire has been a continual spy upon him) is making his addresses to you; if he is so happy as to make himself agreeable to you (whose character I am charm'd with). I shall own him with joy for my son, and forget his 6. former follies.

'I am, madam,

Your most humble servant,

William Gayless,

P. S. I will be soon in town myself to congratulate his • reformation and marriage.

Oh, Melissa, this is too much; thus let me shew my thanks and gratitude, [kneeling she raises him.] for here 'tis only due.

Sharp. A reprieve! a reprieve! a reprieve!

Kit. I have been, Sir, a most bitter enemy to you; but, since you are likely to be a little more conversant with cash han you have been, I am now, with the greatest sincerity,

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