310

INVENTORY OF THEATRICAL PROPERTY.

to the polite assembly I have already mentioned, pre cisely as follows; except that he pronounced it in a way so remote from its orthography, that I could not but wonder by what singular artifice he had contrived to falsify all the terminating syllables of the language.Imprimis-Hamlet's inky cloak-quite new, never in

deed worn.

N. B. None of the sable professions need apply; as the said inky cloak is green lined with red, the same having been bought of a slopseller at Elsineur, upon Hamlet's being shipwrecked coming from England. Item-Cardinal Wolsey's handkerchief--curiously

laced in the old English custome. Item-Othello's do. for Cassio to wipe his beard with. All the strawberries as much raised from the ground as those Richard sends for from the Bishop of Ely's garden in Holborn. Item-Iago's do.-folded so snugly as to lie in the smallest possible compass of the inexpressible Canary pantaloons-besides, I have given up the part to Cooke, who plays it like a villain-Now that's villainous !

Item-Six easy chairs for Q. Catherine in the restless scene. The cushions have always tumbled about so in the Queen's slumber, that the swimming Jewess waked Her Majesty one night with laughing. Item-A royal cap and feathers-for Macbeth to strut and fret his hour in-so tall-in short, as Hamlet says, a forest of feathers-that a mad fellow called the thing a shuttlecock from Brobdignag. Item-My beard in King Lear-Curse that same goat's beard! The first night the audience supposed half the curse stuck in my throat, because I could not get it out; I mean the beard. Thus I gave it! That she may curse her crime too late, and feel How sharper-cuk !—uk !—uk!

ON A LATE EXHIBITIÓN.

311

Item-A great bell of a ton weight, for Lady Macbeth's dressing-room, for the Queen to ring two upon. Singularly recommended by the following of the Poet :

--

passage

Go, bid thy mistress, when my drink is ready,
She strike upon the bell.

Item-A basket-hilted sword, to be used in the dagger scene-adopted in pursuance of Shakspeare's plain direction :

I see thee yet (the dagger) in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.

Item-Twenty reports, or more, to throw at the prompter's head, in the same character: hinted at only by the great inan

Bring me no more reports, let them fly all

that is, as I understand it, not the Thanes, but the said reports. Item-All the prompter's books of the playhouse-rendered offensive by the usual marks of entrance upon the stage Enter O. P.

N. B.-As I never will enter O. P. again, that is, opposite to the prompter-I have put the prompter opposite in other words, altered his station at the Theatre: he is right on the left side.

Here my ears were assailed with a din so alarming, that I awoke, and consequently conclude O. P.

ON A LATE EXHIBITION IN THE PIT OF COVENT GARDEN THEATRE.

[From the Public Ledger, Nov. 16.]

TW

WO Cockneys took their night-caps to the play, But found no rest, to Bow Street dragg'd away. Had Kemble acted, and O. P. been quiet,

They might have slept, and 'scap'd the charge of riot.

O. P. Q. IN A CORNER.

Á FABLE.

( 312 )

A FABLE.

(WRITTEN IN THE STYLE OF GAY.)' [From the Morning Chronicle, Nov. 17.). WHEN men, advanc'd to high estate,

With sudden dignity elate,
Forget the means by which they rose,
And other means would interpose;
These men are quickly hurled down,
The scoff and laughter of the town.

A statesman of experienc'd parts,
Possess'd of all a statesman's arts,
While groaning at the point of death,
Thus spoke his friends, with gasping breath:
"My friends (said he), whate'er you do,
Continue to each other true;
Though ranks of opposition rail,
Let no internal jars prevail;
Supported by each other's aid,
Of nothing need you be afraid;
But, from the moment you forget
This maxim, you are overset.
Discord 's the prelude to disgrace,
And (what is worse) to loss of place.
I charge you then, whate'er you do,
Continue to each other true."
He said and, with prophetic sigh,
Dismiss'd them, and prepar'd to die.

Instructed thus, the little crew
Continu'd to each other true;
And, at his death, set up a plea
Of Vigour and No Popery;
By which they were accordingly
Elected to the Ministry.

-Of place and power now possess'd,
They put his counsel to the test;
Defended, with their utmost skill,
Abuses of notorious ill;
Bought certain seats, and others sold,
In bargains, with the Treas'ry gold;
And places of the Board of Trade
A medium of barter made.

THE RETORT COURTEOUS.

In cases of small enterprise
The Park and Tower ordnance flies;
But, though so ready with their gun,
In great ones, they could fire none.--
In short, the public voice complain'd,
But still their places they retain'd;
For this, and more too, they might do,
So long as they continu'd true.
When, lo! in an unlucky hour,
Regardless of the means of pow'r,
A spark of enmity prevails,
And quick each Minister assails.
They wrangle now in constant strife;
They hanker for each other's life;
And all, with one endeavour, strive
Each other from his post to drive:
(Although, with most consummate art,
Each plays a well-dissembled part,
And feigns a friendship for the man
Whose ruin he is known to plan :)
Till, stifled to the last degree,
The flame at length bursts openly;
And then this famous Ministry
Of vigour and No Popery,
Distracted by internal brawls,
A victim to its vigour falls.

THE RETORT COURTEOUS.
[From the same, Nov. 18.]

TALL as the steeple of the town,
From which his title's ta'en,
Lord Salisbury, of high renown,
Once enter'd Drury Lane.

At the box door stood young Wagstaffe,
A wit devoid of grace;

He wanted but to gain a laugh,
And Sarum's Peer a place.

The Earl mistook the graceless cur,
And cried, with looks askew,
"Pray, friend, are you the Box-keeper?"
Says Wagstaffe-"No; are you?".

VOL. XIII.

313

FROM

FROM THE MORNING CHRONICLE.

[Nov. 18.]

"Quem virum aut heroa, lyrâ vel acri
Tibia sumes celebrare ?"-HOR.

FOR

OR whom shall Oxford's hallow'd quire
Inspire with life the dormant lyre,
And raise the venal song?
Shall Eldon, now, for once, control
The niggard genius of his soul,

And least Corruption's throng?
Shall he the sumptuous banquet raise,
And revel on the unbought praise
His liberal mind shall gain?
Loudly shall he his conscience vaunt,
And spur, with many an impious taunt,
Dark Superstition's train?

Shall be each sordid, selfish mind
With interest's steady fetters bind,

The churchman's guiding star?
Shall deanery, prebendary stall,
Be offer'd us in lieu of all

We look for in our Chancellor?

Shall Beaufort, polish'd, generous, gay,
O'er Learning's bow'rs hold sovereign sway,
And boast his high descent?
These academic groves, of yore,
Would ne'er re-echo back the roar
Of sport and noisy merriment.
Enjoy, my Lord; we leave to you
The well-earn'd glory justly due

To all your sporting feats;
Let Learning, such as few can claim,
Unsullied honour, spotless fame,

Preside o'er Learning's seats.
And if to Oxford still was dear
That virtue which she must revere,
That patriot heart and hand-
If mild Religion's temper'd fires
Could plead-o'er Oxford's tow'ring spires
Would Grenville hold conmand.

But