College, that can instruct her in all the
Mysterys of writing letters, corrupting
Servants, taming fpies; where the must have that
Rich gown for fuch a great day, a new one
For the next, a richer for the third; be
Serv'd in filver, have the chamber fill'd with
A fucceffion of grooms, footmen, ufhers,
And other meffengers; besides embroiderers,
Jewellers, tire women, femfters, feather-men,
Perfumers; whilft fhe feels not how the land
Drops away, nor the acres melt; nor forefees
The change, when the mercer has your woods
For her velvets: never weighs what her pride
Cofts, fir, fo fhe may kiss a page, or a
Smooth chin, that has the despair of a beard;
Be a Statefwoman, know all the news, what
Was done at Salisbury, what at the Bath,
What at court, what in progress: or, so she
May cenfure poets, and authors, and stiles,
And compare them, Daniel with Spencer,
Johnson with th'other youth, and fo forth; or
Be thought cunning in controverfies, or
The very knots of divinity, and have often
In her mouth the ftate of the question:
And then skip to the mathematicks, and
Demonstration and anfwer in religion
To one, in ftate to another, in bawdry
To a third. All this is very true, Sir.
And then her going in difguife to that
Conjurer, and this cunning woman; where
The first question is, how foon you shall dye?
Next, if her present servant love her? next,
That if the fhall have a new fervant? and
How many? which of her family would
Make the best bawd, male or female?
What precedence fhe fhall have by her next
Match and fets down the answers, and believes
Them above the fcriptures. Nay, perhaps fhe'll
Study the art and then comes reeking home
Of vapour and sweat, with going a foot,
And lies in a month of a new face, all
Oil, and bird-lime; and rifes in affes
Milk, and is cleans'd with a new fucus: God
Be with you fir, one thing more (which I had
Almoft forgot) This too, with whom you are
To marry, may have made a conveyance
Of her virginity aforehand, as
Your wife widows do of their estates, before
They marry, in trust to some friend, fir; who
Can tell? or if the have not done it yet,
She may do, upon the wedding day, or
The night before, and antidate you cuckold.
Johnfon's Silent Woman.
He that will choofe
A good wife from a bad, come learn of me,
That hath try'd both, in wealth and misery.
A good wife will be careful of her fame,
Her husband's credit, and her own good name,
And fuch art thou: a bad wife will refpect
Her pride, her luft, and her own name neglect,
And such art thou; a good wife will be still
Industrious, apt to do her husband's will;
But a bad wife, crofs, fpightful and madding,
Never keep home, but always be a gadding,
And fuch art thou; good wife will conceal
Her husband's dangers, and no thing reveal
That may procure him harm, and fuch art thou:
But a bad wife corrupts chaft wedlock's vow,
On this fide vertue, and on that fide fin,
On this who strive to loose, or this to win:
Here lives perpetual joy, here burning woe.
Now husbands choose on which hand will you go?
Seek vertuous wives, all husbands will be bleft;
Fair wives are good, but vertuous wives are beft.
They that my fortunes will perufe, fhall find
No beauty's like the beauty of the mind.
How a Man may choose a good Wife from a bad.
-My dear lord's wife, and knows
That tinfel glitter, or rich purfled robes,
Curled hairs, hung full of fparkling carcanets,
Are not the true adornments of a wife:
So long as wives are faithful, modeft, chaft,
Wife lords affect them. Vertue doth not wast
With each flight flame of crackling vanity.
A modeft eye forceth affection,
Whilft outward gaynefs, light looks but entice;
Fairer than nature's fair, is fouleft vice.
She that loves art, to get her cheek more lovers,
Much outward gawds, flight inward grace difcovers:
I care not to feem fair, but to my lord.
Those that strive moft to please a ftranger's fight,
Folly may judge moft fair, wifdom molt light.
Marfion's Second Part of Antonio and Mellida.
In the election of a wife, as in
A project of war, to err but once, is
To be undone for ever. You are a man
Well funk in years, and to graft fuch a young
Bloffom into your flock, is the next way
To make ev'ry carnal eye befpeak your injury.
Troth I pity her too; fhe was not made
To wither and go out by painted fires,
That yields her no more heat than to be lodg'd
In fome bleak banquetting houfe in the dead
Of winter; and what follows then? your fhame,
And the ruin of your children; and there's
The end of a rash bargain.
Middleton's Any thing for a quiet Life.
'Tis not enough for one that is a wife
To keep her spotlefs from an act of ill,
But from fufpition fhe fhould free her life,
And bare her felf of pow'r as well as will:
'Tis not fo glorious for her to be free,
As by her proper felf reftrain'd to be.
When she hath fpacious ground to walk upon,
Why on the ridge should she defire to go?
It is no glory to forbear alone
Thofe things, that may her honour overthrow:
But 'tis thank-worthy, if fhe will not take
All lawful liberties for honour's fake.
That wife, her hand against her fame doth rear,
That more than to her lord herself will give
A private word to any fecond ear;
And though the may with reputation live,
Yet, though moft chaft, fhe doth her glory blot,
And wounds her honour, though fhe kills it not.
When to their husbands they themselves do bind,
Do they not wholly give themselves away ?
Or give they but their body, not their mind,
Referving that though beft for others, pray?
No fure, their thoughts no more can be their own;
And therefore fhould to none but one be known.
Then the ufurps upon another's right,
That feeks to be by publick language grac'd: And though her thoughts reflect with pureft light, Her mind, if not peculiar, is not chaft.
For in a wife it is no worse to find,
A common body, than a common mind.
And ev'ry mind though free from thought of ill,
That out of glory feeks a worth to fhew:
When any's ears but one therewith they fill,
Doth in a fort her pureness overthrow.
Let all young sprightly wives that have
Dull foolish coxcombs to their husbands,
Learn by me their duties, what to do;
Which is, to make them fools, and please them too.
Beaumont and Fletcher's Noble Gentlemen.
The fum of all that makes a man, a juft man happy,
Confifts in the well choofing of his wife;
And there well to difcharge it, does require
Equality of years, of birth, of fortune;
For beauty being poor, and not cry'd up
By birth or wealth, can truly mix with neither:
And wealth, where there's fuch difference in years,
And fair descent, muft make the yoke uneafy.
Malinger's New Way to pay old Debts.
A witty wife, with an imperious will,
Being croft, finds means to crofs her husband ftill. Richard Brome's Mad Couple well match'd.
If e'er l take a wife, I will have one,
Neither for beauty nor for portion,
But for her vertues; and i'll marry'd be
Not for my luft, but for pofterity:
And when i'm wed, i'll never jealous be,
But make her learn how to be chaft by me:
And be her face what 'twill, i'll think her fair,
If fhe within the house confine her care:
If modeft in her words and cloaths the be,
Not daub'd with pride, and prodigality:
If with her neighbours fhe maintains no ftrife,
And bears her felf to me a faithful wife;
I'd rather unto fuch a one be wed,
Than clafp the choiceft Hellen in my bed:
Yet though the were an angel, my affection
Should only love, not doat on her perfection.
Sufpicion, difcontent, and ftrife,
Come in for dowry with a wife.
Oh fervile state of conjugal embrace!
Where seeming honour covers true difgrace.
We with reproachés, miftreffes defame;
But we poor wives endure the greatest shame :
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