she had succeeded in placing him in the right position, it was difficult to fix him there. Finally, there was the stage to be erected, and as the house was destitute of folding-doors, much time and labor were expended in so arranging it, as to combine elegance with economy. On this stage, Miss Peebles intended to exhibit a singular patch-work quilt, having red hearts on a white ground, emblematic of love and innocence. It had been wrought by her own hands, at a period when she derived pleasure from hope rather than memory, and had been carefully locked up till the present memorable exhibition. It was to be used as the drop-scene, and the fair owner sighed, as she devoted it to a purpose so different from that for which it was originally designed. But the labor of preparation at length was over. The long desired evening had arrived; the last rehearsals had in some measure quieted the fears of Miss Peebles; her assistants had full confidence in their powers; and every nook and corner of the long parlor was crowded with guests, except that portion allotted for the stage. This was concealed by the quilt wrought in hearts, flanked on the right by a quilt of sober brown, and on the left, by the green table cloth. As soon as the company were seated, and something like order reigned, Miss Peebles announced that, preparatory to the first tableau, Mr. Snoodles would give an appropriate air upon the flute. Whereupon Mr. Snoodles, after a preliminary flourish, commenced, in good earnest, with the Road to Boston.' But after a few bars, the performer became so much embarrassed, that he was unable to contract his lips to the requisite pucker, in consequence of which the instrument gave an uncertain sound. He was relieved, however, from his painful situation, by the timely interference of Squire Peebles, who gave three cheers, in approbation of what he called 'the variations,' and in which cheers, as in duty bound, his guests united. It was at this moment, that Mr. Snoodles made his exit. A bell, which had hitherto graced the neck of a favorite wether, then gave the signal that all was ready; the buzz ceased, and the curtain rose in the presence of longing eyes. For a few moments, there was a breathless silence; when on a sudden, such an involuntary burst of applause succeeded, as satisfied Miss Peebles that her victory was achieved. Mr. Snoodles, who acted as sub-manager, then announced, that this tableau was taken from an ancient work, called Tristam Shandy, in which there was an interesting colloquy between a gentleman called my Uncle Toby, and a certain Widow Wadman. The former character, as they would perceive, was personated by Mr. Dawkins, and the latter by Miss Peebles. He then bowed and withdrew. The widow was dressed in half mourning, as widows of right ought to be, her head covered with a neat mob cap, and her neck ornamented with beads. She was sitting on a high-backed chair, and was leaning a little to one side, pointing with the finger to her left eye. My Uncle Toby was dressed in a scarlet coat, plum-colored breeches, and black gaiters. His hair on each side displayed two massive rolls, one just above each ear, and was highly powdered. That in the rear was fastened by an eel-skin, and so tightly drawn, that the eyes appeared to be starting from their sockets. His chair was drawn close to the widow's, and he was anxiously endeavoring to discover a certain moat, which the widow pretended had lodged in the eye aforesaid, and was troublesome. For farther particulars, we refer the reader to the work itself, assuring him that he will rise from the perusal, convinced that a scene more touching could not have well been selected. There was one difficulty in the case, which it was impossible to obviate, and which in some measure marred the effect. Mr. Dawkins had such an obliquity of vision, that only one orb could be brought to bear upon the widow; the other was, 'In wandering mazes lost.' Hence, as he was unable to give that scrutinizing glance which the scene required, Mr. Snoodles had to step forward and give some notes explanatory, which added greatly to the interest. Mr. Martin, however, ventured to remark, that if he might judge from my Uncle Toby's eyes, his attentions were divided. Squire Peebles maintained the contrary. It is perfectly plain,' says he, that Uncle Toby has a single eye to the widow.' The Squire always laughed heartily at a joke, especially his own; and as the jokes of those at whose expense we are feasted, have somehow a peculiar relish, the curtain fell amidst reverberating peals. In announcing tableau number two, Mr. Snoodles desired the company to bear in mind that it was all illusion; that there was nothing real in it. He mentioned this, because such was the exquisite sensibility of some present, that nothing tragic could be seen, without the hazard of an irreparable shock. By this timely warning, the ladies were in some measure prepared for the horrors that were in store; and what greatly conduced to it, was Miss Patch's vial of hartshorn, which passed and repassed with the rapidity of a shuttle. Still, many a heart was palpitating, and when the curtain rose, there were at least two shrieks that mingled with the involuntary groans. This tableau was the murder of Miss McCrea. The victim of Indian cruelty was personated by Miss Nancy Bean, an intimate friend of Miss Peebles, and about the same age; the latter having cogent reasons for excluding from her corps those of more tender years. Miss Bean was on her knees, her white dimity spotted with blood, and her hands, upraised as if her only hope were in a higher power than man. Over her stood one in the garb of an Indian, having in one hand her auburn locks, and in the other a scalping-knife. This was Mr. Snoodles; and yet the change was so sudden and complete, that it seemed scarcely possible. A horseblanket partially enveloped his person, and beneath it were seen his pants of red flannel. His breast was ornamented with a platter of bright pewter, suspended from the neck by strings of beads, and his face was covered with alternate streaks of lamp-black and red ochre. When the spectators had recovered from their momentary alarm, they expressed their admiration in no measured terms. Mr. Snoodles was ambitious, and it is not strange that he became fairly intoxicated with this unexpected applause. He forgot himself. He was no longer Snoodles, and lost his identity in that of the savage. Flourishing his knife, he drew back as if to give a more effectual blow, when a heart-rending shriek burst from the lips of Miss Bean, which was answered in full chorus by the fairer portion of the spectators. The curtain fell as if by magic; but not till they had seen Snoodles all aghast, the artificial tresses dangling from his fingers, and the head of his intended victim as bald as an infant's. Overwhelmed with confusion at this untimely exposure, she rushed from the scene of her expected triumph, and from the village; for it was remarked that her usual seat in the west parish was vacant for some months afterward. To divert the attention of her guests from this unfortunate dénouement, Miss Peebles requested Captain Tarbox to favor them with a song. The Captain was always obliging, and after a few astounding hems, by way of symphony, delighted the audience with Judy O'Flanagan.' He was immediately followed by Miss Peebles, who, under the impression that a serious strain would be more in accordance with the last tableau, gave 'Cruel Barbara Allen.' She was accompanied on the bass-viol by an amateur. At the conclusion, Squire Peebles observed, that if he had foreseen the effect of the last tune, he should have entered his veto; he wanted nothing pathetic. I hold,' he continued, 'that the human frame is made up of dry sand, and every thing that has a tendency to make it drier, ought to be voted down. I move, therefore, that we adjourn to the back room, and renovate with some hot punch. I maintain that punch is your true beverage for supplying the radical moisture.' This motion was warmly seconded, especially by Captain Tarbox; who remarked, that it was high time to splice the main brace, as it would soon be his turn upon deck; alluding to the third tableau, in which he was to appear as 'Laocoon.' If horror sat on every countenance on beholding tableau number two, it was increased ten fold by tableau number three. Tarbox appeared struggling in mortal agony. He was divested of his coat and vest, and his shirt sleeves were rolled up, displaying his sinewy arms, on each of which was an anchor in Indian ink, with the initials of his name. The nether man was arrayed in drab unmentionables, and parti-colored silk hose, with large pink clocks. Thirty years ago, these last were fashionable; and as at that period they displayed to advantage the Captain's leg, he invariably wore them when on shore at Point Peter. In getting up the snakes, who were enveloping the captain in their folds, Miss Peebles evinced no small inventive power. She had connected together several boas, and at each extremity had affixed a head, covered with tin foil, with jaws distended, and with forked tongue, the two last being composed of red baize. These hideous reptiles were coiled around the neck and body of their victims and were so arranged, that his hands were fastened upon each throat, and with a tenacity of grasp that manifested his determination to die game. One leg was thrown backward, and sustained his entire weight, while his head was twisted so far to the left, as to appear somewhat in profile, but so horribly distorted, as to lose all vestige of the original Tarbox, though strongly marked. It was evident to some, that his distress was not entirely feigned. The fact was, that his attitude was so unnatural and painful, that though he suffered with the firmness of a martyr, it was not in human nature to endure it long. While thus upon the rack, he cast an occasional furtive glance at his old partner Peebles, suspecting that the latter might be laughing in his sleeve. Satisfied, at length, that such was the fact, and conscious that he was playing a part somewhat ridiculous, he cried out, 'Let go the clue garnets, my lads! let go! My figure-head has such a heel to port, that no carpenter can right it!' Upon this he sprang forward, and suiting the action to the word, jerked with so much violence upon the curtain, that the hooks which supported it gave way, and Tarbox and scenery came down together. The Squire, as soon as he saw that his friend had sustained no injury, exclaimed, 'Order! gentlemen; Captain Tarbox has the floor.' He then waved his hand, as a signal for three rounds, in which, however, being convulsed with laughter, he was unable to join. The only actual sufferer on this occasion was Mr. Martin; it being customary with the Squire, whenever he uttered what he deemed a good joke, to remind him of it by a punch in his ribs. It was as much as to say, 'Do you catch the idea?' This at times was no easy matter, even for those who had some quickness of apprehension; and to this Martin had no claims. Rising from his chair with some difficulty, the Squire again wished them to adjourn for a short interval, till Marcy' had repaired damages. I think,' said he, 'that as this was emphatically a drop-scene, it is but right that we take a drop.' Here he again punched Martin, and in a most excellent humor led off, followed by all the gentlemen. The fourth tableau, which was to conclude the evening's entertainment, was well calculated to excite an interest in every American bosom. This was 'Washington taking leave of his family.' Miss Peebles had been unremitting in her endeavors to render this tableau worthy of the subject; and she was so fortunate as to find at Dr. Snaggs' an engraving of this very scene. No pen can describe the emotion of the spectators, when this affecting exhibition opened to their view. Old Major Smith, who was out in '79,' actually shed tears, and even the Squire looked grave, and doubled his allowance of rappee. Mr. Snoodles, who personated the faithful black, was redolent of Day and Martin, and assumed a gravity of demeanor suited to the scene. Miss Peebles, as Lady Washington, was dressed in a rich drab silk, and a lace cap, high in the crown, and bordered with a deep ruffle. A cambric handkerchief concealed her face, and it was undoubtedly wet with tears; for she tottered with emotion. Squire Peebles, on account of his great corpulency, was considered as the best qualified to represent the Father of his Country, and in that character he was urged to appear. But he was deaf to all their entreaties, and, as the only alternative, it devolved on Dr. Snaggs. The person of this gentleman afforded a fine contrast to that of Peebles, being short in stature, and almost as destitute of flesh as one of his own skeletons. A casual glance at him, would leave any thing but the impression that he was born to command. But a closer observation would detect a carriage decidedly military; a broad pug nose, indicative of firmness, and an eye of fire. In fact, Dr. Snaggs, though professedly a disciple of Apollo, was in reality a worshipper of Mars. He at one time held a commission in the Tabbyville Blues, was afterward attached to the staff in the division, and was always distinguished for his daring in the autumnal sham fights. It was this predilection for garments rolled in blood, that probably led him to treat his patients after the method of Sangrado. Between the doctor and Miss Peebles, there was some little difference of opinion relative to the appropriate ornament for the General's head; the latter contending for a three-cornered hat, in conformity to the engraving, and the doctor being equally strenuous for a tin cap, surmounted with horse hair, and worn by the Tabbyville Blues. The matter was finally arranged to the entire satisfaction of both; Miss Peebles yielding in favor of the tin cap, on condition that the Doctor would appear in her brother's buff vest, which, when stuffed with a pillow, made a tolerable fit. The uniform coat he had obtained from one of the cavalry; it had the usual quantity of scarlet, edged with gold cord, but was lamentably deficient in the skirts. In the tableau, the general appeared with his right hand clasping that of his lady, his attitude erect, his eye averted, and the base of his nose elevated to an angle of forty-five. From the expression of his countenance, it was evident that there had been an agonizing struggle between love and patriotism, and that the latter had triumphed. At this moment, Snoodles, anxious to give a finishing touch to the picture, or else fearful that he was not sufficiently conspicuous, advanced to the front of the stage, and clasping his hands together, rolled his eye-balls gradually to the ceiling. But in the endeavor to preserve his balance, in this new attitude, he displayed a portion of his person that led to results wholly different from his anticipations; this was his artificial African heel, somewhat elongated. As might well be imagined, this unexpected sight occasioned a cachinnation among the treble in the front seat, which was soon joined by the alto of Mr. Popkin, and at length closed with the deep bass of the Squire. Doctor Snaggs, surprised at this ill-timed levity, and, from his position, ignorant of the cause, started back indignant. His motion, however, was much too violent for the buttons of the buff vest; and the pillow bursting from its confines, produced a roar of laughter, which it was impossible to suppress. Meanwhile, the unfortunate Snoodles, perceiving nothing amiss, and unconscious that he had been the cause of all these 'moving accidents,' was completely paralyzed by this sudden change from grave to gay; nor, until Lady Washington herself rushed forward, and dropped the curtain, was Snoodles himself again.' These were the first 'tableaux' at Tabbyville, and the last. Miss Peebles, mortified at the total failure, has announced her determination to give no more parties, and even is 'not at home' to any except Miss Nancy Bean. It is certain that no one else, with the present raw matériel, will have the courage to attempt a similar exhibition, BURNS. SO FINE his muse, 'tis half a crime |