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your self in that thought ; for you are almost the only Woman to whom one can safely address the praises of another. Besides can you imagine a Man of my importance so stupid, as to say fine things to you before your Husband ? Let us see how far Lady M----- her self dares do any thing like it, with all the wit and address she is mistress of. If Sir Robert can be so ignorant (now he is left to himself in the country) to imagine any such matter, let him know from me, that here in town every thing that Lady fays, is taken for Satire. For my part, every body knows it is my constant practice to speak Truth; and I never do it more than when I call my self
To a Lady in the Name of her Brother. If you have not a chaste ear and a pure heart, do
not peruse this Letter; for as Jeremy Taylor fays in his holy living and dying, the first thing a Virgin ought to endeavour, is to be ignorant of the difinetion of Sexes.
It is in the confidence I have that you are thus innocent, that I endeavour to gratify your curiosity in a point, in which I am sensible none but a Brother could do it with decency,
I shall entertain you with the most reigning Curiosity in the town; I mean a Person who is equally the toast of gentlemen and ladies, and is at present more universally admired than any of either Sex You know few proficients have a greater genius for Monfters, than my self; but I never tasted a monster to that degree I have done this creature It was not, like other monsters, produced in the Defarts of Arabia, nor came from the country of the Great Mogul; but is the production of the joint-endeavours. of a Kentish Parson and his Spouse, who intended in, the singleness of heart to have begot a christian but. of one fex, and providence has sent them one of two.
There are various opinions concerning this Creature about town. Mr. Cromwell observes that the Age is very licentious, and the present Reign very ewd and corrupt, in permitting a Lady by Authoriíy (as appears by the printed bills) to expose her personal curiofities for a shilling.
i Mr. P---- looks upon it as a Prodigy portending some great Revolution in the State; to strenghten which opinion, he produces the following Prophecy of Nostradamus, which he explains politically,
When as two Sexes join'd in One,
Mrs. N------ admires what people wonder at so much ; and says she is just so herself. The Dutchess of S----- is of the same opinion.
Among these various conjectures, that I might be informed of the truth, I took along with me a Physician and a Divine; the one to inspect the state of its Body, the other to examine that of its, Mind. The persons I made choice of were the ingenious Dr. P-.-- and the reverend Mr. We were no sooner in the room, but the Party came to us drest in that habit, in which the Ladies affect an Hermophroditical imitation of Men ------- your sharp wit, my dear Sister, will immediately conclude that I mean a Riding-habit,
I think it not material to inform you, whether the Doctor, the Divine, or my self look'd first. The Priest you will maliciously fancy was in his nature most an Infidel, and doubted most of this Miracle ; we therefore propos’d to him to take the surest method of believing, seeing and feeling. He comply'd with both admonitions, and having taken a large pinch of snuff upon it, advis'd us with a nod, that we should by no means regard it as a Female but as a Male, for by so doing we should be guilty of less sinfulness.
The Doctor upon inspection differ'd from this opinion ; he wou'd by no means allow it a miracle, orat most a natural one. He said upon the whole it was a woman ; that whatever might give a handle to think otherwise, was a trifle ; nothing being more common than for a child to be mark'd with that thing which the mother long'd for.
As for this Party's temper of mind, it appears to be a moft even difpofition, partaking of the good qualities of both sexes ; for she is neither fo inaccerfible as other Ladies, nor is he so impudent as other Gentlemen. Of how obliging and complaisant a turn appears by this; that he tells the Ladies he has the Inclinations of a Gentleman, and that she tells the Gentlemen she has the Tendre of a Lady. As a further proof of this affable disposition, he formerly receiv'd visits of the fair sex in their masques ; till an impertinent fellow in a female disguise mingled with a party of ladies, and impudently overheard their improving Speculations.
Notwithstanding this, the civilly promised at my request, that my two fifters should be admitted privately, whenever you would do her the honour of your confideration.
How agreeable soever this fight has been to me, I affure you it cannot be so pleasing as the fight of you in town; an whatever you may see in the coun
try, I dare affirm no man or woman can shew you. the like.
I therefore earnestly desire you to make haste to this place ; for tho' indeed like most other brothers, I should be sorry you were married at my expence ; yet I would by no means, like them, detain you in the country from your admirers : for you may believe me, no brother in the world ever lov'd a Gifter as I do you.
I am, &c.
LET TER V..
Bath, 1714. YOU are to understand, Madam, that my paf
fion for your fair self and your sister, has been divided with the most wonderful regularity in the world.. Even from my infancy. I have been in love with one after the other of you, week by week; and my journey to Bath fell out in the three hundred seventy fixth week of the reign of my Sovereign Lady Sylvia. At the present writing hereof it is the three hundred eighty ninth week of the Reign of your most Serene Majesty, in whole Service I was listed some weeks before I beheld your Sister. This information will account for my writing to either of you hereafter, as either fhall happen to be QueenRegent at that time. .
Pray tell your lister, all the good qualities and virtuous inclinations she has never gave me so much pleafure in her conversation, as that one, vice of her obstinacy will give me mortification this month. Ratcliff commands her to the Bath, and the refuses! Indeed if I were in Berkshire I should honour her for this obftinacy, and magnify.her no less for disobedience than we do the Barcelonians. But people change with the change of places (as we fee of late) and 'virtues become vices when they cease to be for one's intereft, with me, as with others.
Yet let me tell her, she will never look so finely while she is upon earth, as she would here in the water. It is not here as in most other instances ; for those Ladies that would please extremely, must go out of their own element. She does not make half so good a figure on horseback as Christina Queen of Sweden ; but were she once seen in the Bath, no man wou'd part with her for the best Mermaid in christendom. You know I have seen you often, I perfectly know how you look in black and in white; I have experienc'd the utmost you can do in colours; but all your movements, all your graceful steps de: serve not half the glory you might here attain, of a moving and easy behaviour in Buckram: Something between swimming and walking, free enough, and more modestly-half-naked, than you can appear any where else. You have conquer'd enough already by ; fhow your ambition, and vanquishi also by
We have no pretty Admirals on these Seas, but iuft strike fail to your white Flags, were they once hoisted up.
The Buckram I mention is a dress particularly useful at this time, when we are told the Princess is bringing over the fashion of German Ruffs.
You ought to use yourselves to some degrees of stiffness beforehand. And when our Ladies chins have been tickled a-while with starch'd muslin and wire, they may possibly bear the brush of a German bcard and whisker.
I cou'd tell you a delightful story of Dr. P.-but want room to display it in all its shining circumstances. He had heard it an excellent cure for Love, to kiss the Aunt of the person beloved, who is generally of years and experience enough to damp the fiercest flame: he try'd this course in his paflion, and kiss'd Mrs. E--- at Mr. D---'s ; but he says it will not do, and that he loves you as much as ever.