Ang. Here is neither cheer, sir, nor welcome; we would fain have either. Bal. In debating which was best, we shall part with neither'. E. Dro. They stand at the door, master; bid 5 bid them welcome hither. E. Ant. There is something in the wind, that we cannot get in. [garments were thin. E. Dro. You would say so, master, if your Your cake here is warm within; you stand here 10 [bought and sold. in the cold: It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so E. Ant. Go fetch me something, I'll break ope [your knave's pate. the gate. S. Dro. Break any thing here, and I'll break 15| E. Dro. A man may break a word with you, sir: and words are but wind; [behind. Ay, and break it in your face, so he break it not S. Dro. It seems, thou wantest breaking: Out upon thee, hind! S. Dro. Ay, when fowls have 20 E. Dro. Here's too much, out upon thee! I pray thee let me in. [fish have no fin. no feathers, and Go, borrow me a [mean you so 25 E. Dro. A crow without feather; master, For a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a crow. If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow crow [dom 35 [you. Bal. Have patience, sir; oh, let it not be so; And dwell upon your grave when you are dead : E. Ant. You have prevail'd; I will depart in Hath oftentimes upbraided me withal; E. Ant. Do so; this jest shall cost me some ex- SCENE II. The house of Antipholis of Ephesus. If you did wed my sister for her wealth, Then, for her wealth's sake, use her with more Or, if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth; [ness: Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator; Ill deeds are doubled with an evil word. Being compact' of credit, that you love us; Comfort my sister, chear her, call her wife: 45Tis holy sport, to be a little vain"; [strife. When the sweet breath of flattery conquers S. Ant. Sweet mistress, (what your name is else, I know not, Nor by what wonder you do hit of mine) 50 Less, in your knowledge, and your grace, you [divine. show not, Than our earth's wonder; more than earth Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak; Lay open to my earthy gross conceit, 55 Smother d in errors, feeble, shallow, weak, The folded meaning of your words' deceit. Meaning, we shall share with neither. 2 A proverbial phrase. To make the door, is a provincial expression, signifying to bar or fasten the door. The meaning is, I will be mer y, even out of spight to mirth, which is, now, of all things, the most unpleasing to me. made up. Fain here signilies not true. Compact here means But But if that I am I, then well I know, Your weeping sister is no wife of mine, Nor to her bed no homage do I owe; Far more, far more, to you do I decline. [note, Oh, train me not, sweet mermaid', with thy To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears; Sing, syren, for thyself, and I will dote: Spread o'er the silver waves thy golden hairs, And as a bed I'll take thee, and there lie; And, in that glorious supposition, think [die:He gains by death, that hath such means to Let love, being light, be drowned if he sink! Luc. What, are you mad,that you do reason so? S. Ant. Not mad, but mated2; how, I do not know. Luc. It is a fault that springeth from your eye. S. Ant. For gazing on your beams, fair sun, being by. Luc. Gaze where you should, and that will clear your sight. 5 10 15 S. Ant. As good to wink, sweet love, as look 20 on night. [so. Luc. Why call you me, love? call my sister S. Ant. Thy sister's sister. Luc. That's my sister. S. Ant. No; It is thyself, mine own self's better part; Luc. Oh, soft, sir, hold you still; I'll fetch my sister, to get her good-will. [Exit Luc. Enter Dromio of Syracuse. S. Ant. Why, how now, Dromio? where run'st thou so fast? 25 30 land yet is she a wondrous fat marriage. S. Ant. How dost thou mean, a fat marriage? S. Dro. Marry, sir, she's the kitchen-wench, and all grease; and I know not what use to put her to, but to make a lamp of her, and run from her by her own light. I warrant, her rags, and the tallow in them, will burn a Poland winter: if she lives till doomsday, she'll burn a week longer than the whole world. S. Ant. What complexion is she of? S. Dro. Swart, like my shoe, but her face uothing like so clean kept; For why, she sweats, a man may go over shoes in the grime of it. S. Ant. That's a fault that water will mend. S. Dro. No, sir, 'tis in grain; Noal's flood could not do it. S. Ant. What's her name? S. Dro. Nell, sir;-but her name and three quarters (that is, an ell and three quarters,) will not measure her from hip to hip. S. Ant. Then she bears some breadth? S. Dro. No longer from head to foot, than from hip to hip; she is spherical, like a globe; I could find out countries in her. [land? S. Ant. In what part of her body stands IreS. Dro. Marry, sir, in her buttocks; I found it out by the bogs. S. Ant. Where Scotland? S. Dro. I found it by the barrenness; hard, in the palm of the hand. S. Ant. Where France? S. Dro. Do you know me, sir? am I Dromio? 40 in her breath. am I your man? am I myself? S. Ant. Thou art Dromio, thou art my man, thou art thyself. S. Dro. I am an ass, I am a woman's man, and besides myself. S. Ant. What woman's man? and how besides thyself? S. Dro. Marry, sir, besides myself, I am due to a woman; one that claims me, one that haunts me, one that will have me. S. Ant. What claim lays she to thee? S. Ant. Where America, the Indies? S. Dre. Oh, sir, upon her nose, all o'er embellish'd with rubies, carbuncles, sapphires, declining their rich aspect to the hot breath of 45 Spain; who sent whole armadoes of carracks to be ballasted at her nose. S. Ant. Where stood Belgia, the Netherlands? S. Dro. Oh, sir, I did not look so low. To conclude, this drudge, or diviner, laid claim to me; 50 call'd me Dromio; swore, I was assur'd' to her; told me what privy marks I had about me, as the mark of my shoulder, the mole in my neck, the great wart on my left arm, that I, amaz'd, ran from her as a witch: And, I think, if my b east had not been made of faith, and my heart of steel, she had transform'd me to a curtail dog, and made me turn i' the wheel. [road; S. Dro. Marry, sir, such a claim as you would lay to your horse; and she would have me as a beast: not that, I being a beast, she would have 55 me; but that she, being a very beastly creature, lays claim to me. S. Ant. What is she? S. Ant. Go, hie thee presently, post to the And if the wind blow any way from shore, will not harbour in this town to-night. That is, another name for syren. That is, confounded. This alludes to her having the French disease. That is, affianced to her. If any bark put forth, come to the mart, Ang. Master Antipholis? Ang. I know it well, sir: Lo, here is the chain; S.Ant.What is your will, that I shall do with this? Ang. What please yourself, sir; I have made it for you. S. Ant. Made it for me, sir! I bespoke it not. Ang. Not once, nor twice, but twenty times you have: Go home with it, and please your wife withal; And soon at supper-time I'll visit you, And then receive my money for the chain. 10 S. Ant. I pray you, sir, receive the money now, For fear you ne'er see chain nor money more. Ang. You are a merry man, sir; fare you [Exit. S. Ant. What I should think of this, I cannot tell: 15 well. But this I think, there's no man is so vain, I see, a man here needs not live by shifts, When in the streets he meets such golden gifts. 20 I'll to the mart, and there for Dromio stay; If any ship put out, then strait away. [Exit. SCENE I. ACT IV. And since I have not much importun'd you; is [you, Ang. Saving your merry humour, here's the note 30 How much your chain weighs to the utmost carat; The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion; Which do amount to three odd ducats more Than I stand debted to this gentleman: il pray you see him presently discharg'd, 35 For he is bound to sea, and stays but for it. E. Ant. I am notfurmish'd with the present money; Besides, I have some business in the town: Good signior, take the stranger to my house, And with you take the chain, and bid my wife Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof; Perchance, I will be there as soon as you. [self? Ang. Then you will bring the chain to her yours E. Ant. No; bear it with you, lest I come not time enough. Ang. Even just the sum, that I do owe to 40 comes. Ang. Well, sir, I will: Have you the chain about you? E. Ant. An if I have not, sir, I hope you have; Or else you may return without your money. Ang. Nay, come, I pray you, sir, give me the Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman, [chain; And I, to blame, have held him here too long. E. Ant. Goodlord, you use this dalliance, to exYour breach of promise to the Porcupine: [cuse I should have chid you for not bringing it, 55 But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl. [patch. Mer. The hour steals on; I pray yon, sir, disAng. You hear, how he importunes me; the chain E. Ant. A man is well holp up, that trusts to you: A coin worth from eighteen-pence to two E. Ant. Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your money. Ang. Come, come, you know, I gave it you even now; Either send the chain, or send me by some token, shillings. Come, where's the chain? I pray you let me see 5 [you? E. Ant. I answer you! why should I answer Ang. The money, that you owe me for the chain. E.Ant. I owe you none, till I receive the chain. Ang. You know, I gave it you half an hour since. 10 E. Ant. You gave me none; you wrong me much to say so. Ang. You wrong me more, sir, in denying it :| Mer. Well, officer, arrest him at my suit! And charge you in the duke's name to obey me. E. Ant. Consent to pay for that I never had! Ang. Here is thy fee; arrest him, officer;— Offi. I do arrest you, sir; you hear the suit. Ang. Sir, sir, I shall have law in Ephesus, Enter Dromio of Syracuse from the Bay. E. Ant. How now? a madman! why, thou What ship of Epidamnum stays for me? 15 20 She is too big, I hope, for me to compass. The house of Antipholis of Ephesus. Enter Adriana and Luciana. Look'd he or red, or pale; or sad, or merrily? [were. [me. Luc. That love I begg'd for you, he begg'd of move. 25 First, he did praise my beauty; then my speech. Adr. Did'st speak him fair? Luc. Have patience, I beseech. Adr. I cannot, nor I will not, hold me still; My tongue, though not my heart, shall have its 30 He is deformed, crooked, old and sere3, [will. Ill-fac'd, worse-body'd, shapeless every where; Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind; Stigmatical in making, worse in mind. 35 401 S. Dro. A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage. S. Dro. You sent me for a rope's-end as soon: And that shall bail me: hie thee, slave, begone: [Exeunt. S. Dro. To Adriana! that is where we din'd, Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband:] Luc. Who would be jealous then of such a one? No evil lost is wail'd when it is gone. Adr. Ah! but I think him better than I say, And yet, would herein others' eyes were worse: Luc. How, hast thou lost thy breath? [well? 55 One that, before the judgment, carries poor souls to hel". Adr. Why, man, what is the matter? S. Dro. I do not know the matter; he is 'rested on the case. That is, silly. 2 Alluding to those meteors in the sky, which have the appearance of lines of armies meeting in the shock. That is, dry, withered. That is, marked or stigmatized by nature with deformity. A quibble on everlasting, which is the name of a kind of durable stuff. is, a dungeon, for which hell was the cant term. That Adr. What, is he arrested? tell me, at whose suit. But he's in a suit of buff, which 'rested him, that Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the mo- Adr. Go fetch it, sister.-This I wonder at, S. Dro. Not on a band, but on a stronger thing; S. Ant. I understand thee not. S. Dro. No? why, it is a plain case: he that went like a bass-viol, in a case of leather; the man, sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives 5 them a fob, and 'rests them; he, sir, that takes pity on decayed men, and gives 'em suits of durance; he that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his mace, than a morris-pike2. 10 [gone. S. Dro. No, no; the bell: 'tis time that I were 15 It was two ere I left him, and now the clock [hear. strikes one. Adr. The hours come back! that I did never S. Dro. O yes, if any hour meet a serjeant, a'turns back for very fear. Adr. As if time were in debt! how fondly dost thou reason? 20 S. Dro. Time is a very bankrout, and owes more than he's worth, to season. [say, Nay, he's a thief too: Have you not heard men 25 That Time comes stealing on by night and day? If Time be in debt, and theft, and a serjeant in the way, Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day? Enter Luciana. Adr. Go, Dromio; there's the money, bear it strait: And bring thy master home immediately.Come, sister: I am press'd down with conceit; 130 S. Ant. What! thou mean'st an officer? S. Dro. Ay, sir, the serjeant of the band: he, that brings any man to answer it, that breaks his band; one that thinks a man always going to bed, and saith, God give you good rest! S. Ant. Well, sir, there rest in your foolery. Any ship puts forth to-night? may we be gone? S. Dro. Why, sir, I brought you word an hour since, that the bark Expedition put forth tonight; and then were you hindered by the serjeant, to tarry for the hoy, Delay: Here are the angels that you sent for, to deliver you. S. Ant. The fellow is distract, and so am I; Cour. Well met, well met, master Antipholis. S.Dro. Nay, she is worse, she's the devil's dam: and here she comes in the habit of a light wench: and therefore comes, that the wenches say, God Conceit, my comfort,and my injury.[Exeunt.|35|damn me, that's as much as to say, God make me SCENE III. The Street. Enter Antipholis of Syracuse. [me 451 S. Ant. There's not a man I meet, but doth salute 40 Enter Dromio of Syracuse. S. Dro. Master, here's the gold you sent m for: What, have you got the picture of old Adam new apparell'd? S. Ant. What gold is this? What Adam dost thou mean? 1501 a light wench. It is written, they appear to men like angels of light: light is an effect of fire, and fire will burn; ergo, light wenches will burn. Come not near her. [sir. Cour. Your man and you are marvellous merry, Will you go with me? we'll mend our dinner here. S. Dro. Master, if you do expect spoon-meat, or bespeak a long spoon. S. Aut. Why, Dromio? S. Dro. Marry, he must have a long spoon, that must eat with the devil. [of supping? S. Ant. Avoid then, fiend! what tell'st thou me Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress: [ner, I conjure thee to leave me, and be gone. S. Dro. Some devils Ask but the paring of one's nail, a rush, S. Dro. Not that Adam, that kept the paradise, but that Adam, that keeps the prison; he that goes in the calves-skin that was kill'd for the prodigal; he that came behind you, sir, like a 60 evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty. Master, be wise; an' if you give it her, [it. A bond, i. e. an obligatory writing to pay a sum of money, was anciently spelt band. A band is likewise a neckcloth. On this circumstance, we believe, the humour of the passage turns. A more ris-pike was a pike used in a morris or military dance, and is mentioned by our old writers as a formidable weapon. Or here means before. S. Ant. |