THE PRESENT FOR THE PRIEST. cleverer in the town than in the country; and they ought to be so, by all accounts; but in the regard of what I towld you, you see, we're before them intirely." "How so?" said the traveller. "Arrah! bekase they never throuble people in the counthry at all with takin' their measure; but you jist go to a fair, and bring your fut along with you, and somebody else dhrives a cartful o' brogues into the place, and there you sarve yourself; and so the man gets his money and you get your shoes, and every one's plazed.” "But what I mane is-where did I lave off tellin' you about the present for the pricst ?— wasn't it at the bootmaker's shop ?-yes, that was it. Well, sir, on laving the shop, as soon as I kem to myself afther the fellow's impidence, I begun to think what was the next best thing I could get for his reverence; and with that, while I was thinkin' about it, I seen a very respectable owld gintleman goin' by, with the most beautiful stick in his hand I ever set my eyes on, and a goolden head to it that was worth its weight in goold; and it gev him such an iligant look altogether, that says I to myself, 'It's the very thing for Father Kinshela, if I could get sitch another." 227 "Well, I picked out one that looked to my likin' -a good substantial stick, with an ivory top to it for I seen that the goold-headed ones was so dear I couldn't come up to them; and so says I, 'Give me a howld o' that,' says I-and I tuk a grip iv it. I never was so surprised in my life. I thought to get a good, brave handful of a solid stick, but, my dear, it was well it didn't fly out o' my hand a'most, it was so light. 'Phew!' says I, 'what sort of a stick is this ?' 'I tell you it's not a stick, but a cane,' says he. 'Faith! I b'lieve you,' says I. 'You see how good and light it is,' says he. Think o' that, sir!-to call a stick good and light-as if there could be any good in life in a stick that wasn't heavy, and could sthreck a good blow! 'Is it jokin' you are?' says I. 'Don't you feel it yourself?' says he. Throth, I can hardly feel it at all,' says I. 'Sure that's the beauty of it,' says he. Think o' the ignorant vagabone!-to call a stick a beauty that was as light a'most as a bulrush! And so you can hardly feel it!' says he, grinnin'. 'Yis, indeed,' says I; and wh's worse, I don't think I could make any one else feel it either.' 'Oh! you want a stick to bate people with!' says he. "To be sure,' says I; sure that's the use of a stick.' To knock the sinsis out o' people!' says he, And so I wint lookin' about me every shop I grinnin' again. 'Sartinly,' says I, 'if they're seen as I wint by, and at last, in a sthreet they saucy'-lookin' hard at him at the same time. call Dame Sthrcet-and, by the same token, I 'Well, these is only walkin'-sticks,' says he. didn't know why they called it Dame Sthreet till I'Throth, you may say runnin'-sticks,' says I, 'for ax'd; and I was towld they called it Dame Sthreet bekase the ladies were so fond o' walkin' there; and lovely craythurs they wor! and I can't b'lieve that the town is such an onwholesome place to live in, for most o' the ladies I seen there had the most beautiful rosy cheeks I ever clapt my eyes upon-and the beautiful rowlin' eyes o' them! Well, it was in Dame Sthreet, as I was sayin', that I kem to a shop where there was a power o' sticks, and so I wint in and looked at thim; and a man in the place kem to me, and ax'd me if I wanted a cane ? 'No,' says I, 'I don't want a cane; it's a stick I want,' says I. 'A cane, you mane,' says he. 'No,' says I, 'it's a stick '-for I was determined to have no cane, but to stick to the stick. 'Here's a nate one,' says he. 'I don't want a nate one,' says I, 'but a responsible one,' says I. 'Faith!' says he, 'if an Irishman's stick was responsible, it would have a great dale to answer for-and he laughed a power. I didn't know myself what he meant, but that's what he said." "It was because you asked for a responsible stick," said the traveller. you daren't stand before any one with sich a thraneen as that in your fist.' 'Well, pick out the heaviest o' them you plaze,' says he; 'take your choice.' So I went pokin' and rummagin' among them, and, if you believe me, there wasn't a stick in their whole shop worth a kick in the shins -divil a one!" "But why did you require such a heavy stick for the priest?" "Bekase there is not a man in the parish wants it more," says Rory. "Is he SO quarrelsome, then ?" said the traveller. "No, but the greatest o' pacemakers," says Rory. "Then what does he want the heavy stick for?" "For wallopin' his flock, to be sure," said Rory. 'Walloping!" said the traveller, choking with laughter. "Oh! you may laugh," said Rory, "but 'pon my sowl! you wouldn't laugh if you wor undher his hand, for he has a brave heavy one, bless him and spare him to us!" "And what is all this walloping for ?" "Why, sir, whin we have a bit of a fight, for fun, or the regular faction one, at the fair, his reverence sometimes hears of it, and comes av coorse." "Good heaven!" said the traveller, in real astonishment, "does the priest join the battle ?" "No, no, no, sir! I see you're quite a sthranger in the country. The priest join it!-Oh! by no manes. But he comes and stops it! and, av coorse, the only way he can stop it is, to ride into thim, and wallop thim all round before him, and disparse thim-scatther thim like chaff before the wind; and it's the best o' sticks he requires for that same." 'But might he not use his heavy stick for that purpose, and make use of a lighter one on other occasions ?" "As for that matther, sir," said Rory, "there's no knowin' the minit he might want it, for he is often nccessiated to have recoorse to it. It might be, going through the village, the publichouse is too full, and in he goes and drives thim out. Oh! it would delight your heart to see the style he clears a public-house in, in no time!" "But wouldn't his speaking to them answer the purpose as well ?" "Oh, no! he doesn't like to throw away his discoorse on thim; and why should he?-le keeps that for the blessed althar on Sunday, which is a fitter place for it: besides, he does not like to be sevare on us." "Severe!" said the traveller, in surprise; "why, haven't you said that he thrashes you round on all occasions?" "Yis, sir; but what o' that ?-sure that's nothin' to his tongue-his words is like swoords or razhors, I may say we're used to a lick of a stick every day, but not to sich language as his reverence sometimes murthers us with whin we displaze him. Oh! it's terrible, so it is, to have the weight of his tongue on you! Throth! I'd rather let him bate me from this till to-morrow, than have one angry word with him." "I see, then, he must have a heavy stick," said the traveller. "To be sure he must, sir, at all times; and that was the raison I was so particular in the shop." "But about the gridiron ? "Sure I'm tellin' you about it," said Rory; "only I'm not come to it yet. You see," con tinued he, "I was so disgusted with them shopkeepers in Dublin, that my heart was fairly broke with their ignorance, and I seen they knew nothin' at all about what I wanted, and so I came away without anything for his reverence, though it was on my mind all this day on the road, and comin' through the last town in the middle o' the rain, I thought of a gridiron." 'A very natural thing to think of in a shower of rain," said the traveller. "No, 'twasn't the rain made me think of it-I think it was God put a gridiron in my heart, secin' that it was a present for the priest I intended; and when I thought of it, it came into my head afther, that it would be a fine thing to sit on, for to keep one out of the rain, that was ruinatin' my cordheroys on the top o' the coach; so I kept my eye out as we dhrove along up the sthreet, and sure enough what should I see at a shop half way down the town but a gridiron hang. ing up at the door; and so I went back to get it." But isn't a gridiron an odd present ?-hasn't his reverence one already?" 66 46 He had, sir, before it was bruk-but that's what I remembered, for I happened to be up at his place one day, sittin' in the kitchen, when Molly was brilin' some mate an it for his reverence; and while she jist turned about to get a pinch o' salt to shake over it, the dog that was in the place made a dart at the gridiron on the fire, and threw it down, and up he whips the mate, before one of us could stop him. With that Molly whips up the gridiron, and says she, 'Bad luck to you, you disrespectful baste! would nothin' sarve you but the priest's dinner?' and she made a crack o' the gridiron at him. As you have the mate, you shall have the gridiron too,' says she; and with that she gave him such a rap on the head with it, that the bars flew out of it, and his head went though it, and away he pulled it out of her hands, and ran off with the gridiron hangin' round his neck like a necklace; and he went mad a'most with it; for though a kettle to a dog's tail is nath'rel, a gridiron round his neck is 'very surprisin' to him; and away he tatthered over the country, till there wasn't a taste o' the gridiron left together." There wars the youngest Tarquin, Prince of the Latian name. In front of our array, And Aulus, of the seventy fields, Herminius beat his bosom, But never word he spake, He clapped his hand on Auster's mane, Away, away went Auster, Like an arrow from the bow; Black Auster was the fleetest steed Right glad were all the Romans, Who in that hour of dread, When from the south the cheering Mamilius spied Herminius, And dashed across the way: Shall never more go home; And lay thou on for Rome!" All round them paused the battle, Through breast-plate and through breast, And fast flowed out the purple blood Over the purple vest. Mamilius smote Herminius Through head-piece and through head, And side by side those chiefs of pride Together fell down dead. Down fell they dead together, In a great lake of gore, Fast, fast, with heels wild sparning, He burst through ranks of fighting men, His flanks all blood and foam, The wolves they howled and whined; Through many a startled hamlet pass, He rushed through the gate of Tusculum, And paused not from his race Black Auster kept his place, With pats and fond caresses, And decked with coloured ribbons Hung sadly o'er her father's corpse And Aulus, the Dictator, Stroked Auster's raven mane, With heed he looked unto the girths, With heed unto the rein, "Now bear me well, black Auster, Into yon thick array, And thou and I will have revenge THE GREAT PLAGUE IN LONDON. 231 THE GREAT PLAGUE IN LONDON. [DANIEL DEFOE. Here I saw a poor man walking on the bank or sea-wall, as they call it, by himself. I walked awhile also about, seeing the houses all shut up; at last I fell into some talk, at a distance, with this poor man. First, I asked him how people did thereabouts. "Alas! sir," says he, "almost desolate; all dead or sick. Here are very few families in this part, or in that village"-pointing at Poplar-" where half of them are not dead already, and the rest sick." Then, pointing to one house: "There they are all dead," said he, "and the house stands open; nobody dares go into it. A poor thief," says he, "ventured in to steal something, but he paid dear for his theft, for he was carried to the churchyard too last night." Then he pointed to several other houses. "There," says he, "they are all dead--the man and his wife and five children." "Why," says I, "what do you here all alone?" "Why," says he, "I am a poor desolate man: it hath pleased God I am not yet visited, though my family is, and one of my children dead." how do you live then, and how are you kept from the dreadful calamity that is now upon us all ?" "Why, sir," says he, "I am a waterman, and there is my boat," says he; "and the boat serves me for a house: I work in it in the day, and sleep in it in the night; and what I get I lay it down upon that stone," says he, showing me a broad stone on the other side of the street, a good way from his house; "and then," says he, "I halloo and call to them till I make them hear, and they come and fetch it." "Well, friend," says I, "but how can you get money as a waterman? Does anybody go by water these times ?" 66 "Yes, sir," says he, "in the way I am employed, there does. Do you see there," says he, "five ships lie at anchor ?"-pointing down the river a good way below the town-" and do you see," says he, eight or ten ships lie at the chain there, and at anchor yonder?"-pointing above the town. "All those ships have families on board, of their merchants, and owners, and such like, who have locked themselves up, and live on board, close shut in, for fear of the infection; and I tend on them to fetch things for them, and carry letters; and every night I fasten my boat on board one of the ships, and there I sleep by myself; and, blessed be God, I am preserved hitherto." 66 "Well," said I, "friend, but will they let you come on board after you have been on shore here, when this has been such a terrible place, and so infected as it is ?" 66 Why, as to that," said he, "I very seldom go up the ship-side; I deliver what I bring to their boat, but lie by the side, and they hoist it on board." Nay," says I, "but that may be worse, for you must have those provisions of somebody or other; "How do you mean, then," said I, "that you and since all this part of the town is so infected, are not visited?" it is dangerous so much as to speak with anybody." shore here; and I came only now to call my wife, "Poor man!" said I; "and how much hast thou gotten for them ?" "I have gotten four shillings," said he, "which is a great sum, as things go now with poor men; but they have given me a bag of bread too, and a salt fish, and some flesh; so all helps out." "Well," said I, "and have you given it them yet?" |