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therefore of living in a garret, might have been wit in the last age, but continues such no longer, because no longer true. A writer of real merit now

:

may easily be rich, if his heart be set only on fortune and for those who have no merit, it is but fit that such should remain in merited obscurity. He may now refuse an invitation to dinner, without fearing to incur his patron's displeasure, or to starve by remaining at home. He may now venture to appear in company with just such clothes as other men generally wear, and talk even to princes, with all the conscious superiority of wisdom. Though he cannot boast of fortune here, yet he can bravely assert the dignity of independence. Adieu.

LETTER LXXXV.

From the Same.

I HAVE interested myself so long in all the concerns of this people, that I am almost become an Englishman; I now begin to read with pleasure of their taking towns or gaining battles, and secretly wish disappointment to all the enemies of Britain. Yet still my regard to mankind fills me with concern for their contentions. I could wish to see the disturbances of Europe once more amicably adjusted: I am an enemy to nothing in this good world but war; I hate fighting between rival states; I hate it between man and man; I hate fighting even between women!

I already informed you that while Europe was at variance, we were also threatened from the stage with an irreconcileable opposition, and that our singing women were resolved to sing at each other to the end of the season. O, my friend, those

fears were just. They are not only determined to sing at each other to the end of the season, but what is worse, to sing the same song, and what is still more insupportable, to make us pay for hearing.

If they be for war, for my part I should advise them to have a public congress, and there fairly squall to each other. What signifies sounding the trumpet of defiance at a distance, and calling in the town to fight their battles. I would have them come boldly into one of the most open and frequented streets, face to face, and there try their skill in quavering.

However this may be, resolved I am that they shall not touch one single piece of silver more of mine. Though I have ears for music, thanks to Heaven, they are not altogether ass's ears. What! Polly and the Pick-pocket to-night, Polly and the Pick-pocket to-morrow night, and Polly and the Pick-pocket again; I want patience. I'll hear no more. My soul is out of tune. All jarring discord and confusion. Rest, rest, ye three dear clinking shillings in my pocket's bottom, the music you make is more harmonious to my spirit, than cat-gut, rosin, or all the nightingales that ever chirruped in petticoats.

But what raises my indignation to the greatest degree, is that this piping does not only pester me on the stage, but is my punishment in private conversation. What is it to me, whether the fine pipe of one, or the great manner of the other be preferable? What care I, if one has a better top, or the other a nobler bottom? How am I concerned, if one sings from the stomach, or the other sings with a snap? yet paltry as these matters are, they make a subject of debate wherever I go; and this musical dispute, especially among the fair sex, almost always ends in a very unmusical altercation.

Sure the spirit of contention is mixed with the very constitution of the people: divisions among the inhabitants of other countries arise only from their higher concerns; but subjects the most contemptible are made an affair of party here, the spirit is carried even into their amusements. The very ladies, whose duty should seem to allay the impetuosity of the opposite sex, become themselves party champions, engage in the thickest of the fight, scold at each other, and show their courage, even at the expence of their lovers and their beauty.

There are even a numerous set of poets who help to keep up the contention, and write for the stage. Mistake me not, I do not mean pieces to be acted upon it, but panegyrical verses on the performers; for that is the most universal method of writing for the stage at present. It is the business of the stage poet, therefore, to watch the appearance of every new player at his own house, and so come out next day with a flaunting copy of newspaper verses. In these, nature and the actor may be set to run races, the player always coming off victorious; or nature may mistake him for herself; or old Shakespeare may put on his winding-sheet, and pay him a visit; or the tuneful nine may strike up their harps in his praise; or should it happen to be an actress, Venus, the beauteous Queen of Love, and the naked Graces are ever in waiting: the lady must be herself a goddess bred and born; she must....but you shall shall have a specimen of one of these poems, which may convey a more precise idea.

On seeing Mrs. ... perform in the character of ........
TO you, bright fair, the nine address their bays,
And tune my feeble voice to sing thy praise,
The heart-felt power of every charm divine,
Who can withstand their all-commanding shine?
See how she moves along with every grace,

While soul-brought tears steal down each shining face.

She speaks, 'tis rapture all and nameless bliss,
Ye Gods, what transport e'er compared to this!
As when in Paphian groves the Queen of Love,
With fond complaint addressed the listening Jove,
'Twas joy and endless blisses all around,

And rocks forgot their hardness at the sound.
Then first, at last even Jove, was taken in,
And felt her charms without disguise within.

And yet, think not, my friend, that I have any particular animosity against the champions who are at the head of the present commotion; on the contrary, I could find pleasure in the music, if served up at proper intervals; if I heard it only on proper occasions, and not about it wherever I go. In fact, I could patronize them both; and as an instance of my condescension in this particular, they may come and give me a song at my lodgings on any evening when I am at leisure, provided they keep a becoming distance, and stand while they continue to entertain me with decent humility at the door.

You perceive I have not read the seventeen books of Chinese ceremonies to no purpose. I know the proper share of respect due to every rank of society. Stage-players, fire-eaters, singing-women, dancingdogs, wild-beasts, and wire-walkers, as their efforts are exerted for our amusement, ought not entirely to be despised. The laws of every country should allow them to play their tricks at least with impunity. They should not be branded with the ignominious appellation of vagabonds; at least they deserve a rank in society, equal to the mystery of barbers or undertakers; and, could my influence extend so far, they should be allowed to earn even forty or fifty pounds a-year, if eminent in their profession.

I am sensible, however, that you will censure me of profusion in this respect, bred up as you are in the narrow prejudices of eastern frugality. You will undoubtedly assert, that such a stipend is too great for so useless an employment. Yet, how will your