How prone to change is human Life!
Laft Night arriv'd Clem. and his Wife
This grand Event half broke our Measures;
Their Reign began with cruel Seizures;
The Dean must with his Quilt fupply
The Bed in which these Tyrants lie,
Nim loft his Whig-Block, Dan his Jordan,
(My Lady fays fhe can't afford one)
George is half fcar'd out of his Wits,
For Clem. gets all the dainty Bits.
Henceforth expect a diff'rent Survey,
This Houfe will foon turn topfy-turvy.
They talk of further Alterations,

Which caufes many Speculations.

A PASTORAL DIALOGUE.

A

DERMOT, SHEELAH.

Nymph and Swain, Sheelab and Dermot hight,】 Who wont to weed the Court of Gosford Knight, While each with ftubbed Knife remoy'd the Roots That rais'd between the Stones their daily Shoots ; As at their Work they fat in counterview, With mutual Beauty fmit, their Paffion grew. Sing heavenly Mufe in fweetly flowing Strain, The foft Endearments of the Nymph and Swain.

Q4

DER

My Love to Sheelah is more firmly fixt, Than strongest Weeds that grow thefe Stones betwixt : My Spud thefe Nettles from the Stones can part, No Knife fo keen to weed thee from my Heart.

SHEELAH.

My Love for gentle Dermot fafter grows
Than yon tall Dock that rises to thy Nose.
Cut down the Dock, 'twill sprout again, but O!
Love rooted out, again will never grow.

DERMOT.

No more that Bry❜r thy tender Legs shall rake
(I fpare the Thistle for Sir Arthur's Sake.)
Sharp are the Stones, take thou this rufhy Matt;
The hardest Bum will bruize with fitting fquat.

SHEELAH.

Thy Breeches torn behind, stand gaping wide,
This Petticoat fhall fave thy dear Back-side;
Nor need I blush, although you feel it wet;
Dermot, I vow, 'tis nothing else but sweat.

DER

DERMOT.

At an old ftubborn Root I chanc'd to tug, When the Dean threw me this Tobacco Plug: A longer half-porth never did I fee;

This, deareft Sheelah, thou fhalt fhare with me.

SHEELAH.

In at the Pantry door this Morn I flipt,
And from the Shelf a charming Cruft I whipt;
Dennis was out, and I got hither fafe;

And thou, my Dear, fhalt have the bigger half.

DERMOT.

When you faw Tady at long-bullets play, You fat and lows'd him all the Sunshine Day. How could you Sheelah, liften to his Tales, Or crack fuch Lice as his between your Nails?

SHEELAH.

When you with Oonah ftood behind a Ditch, I peept and faw you kiss the dirty Bitch. Dermot, how could you touch those nafty Sluts! I almost wish'd this Spud were in your Guts.

DER

1

DERMOT.

If Oonah once I kifs'd, forbear to chide :
Her Aunt's my Goffip by my Father's Side:
But, if I ever touch her Lips again,
May I be doom'd for Life to weed in Rain,

SHEELAH.

Dermet, I fwear, tho' Tady's Locks could hold Ten thousand Lice, and ev'ry Loufe was Gold, Him on my Lap you never more should fee;

Or may

I lofe my Weeding-knife

and Thee.

DERMOT.

O, could I earn for thee, my lovely Lafs,
A Pair of Brogues to bear thee dry to Mass!
But fee, where Norab with the Sowins comes
Then let us rife, and reft our weary Bums.

Mary

Mary the Cook-Maid's LETTER to

WELL;

Dr. Sheridan.

ELL; if ever I faw fuch another Man fince my Mother bound my Head,

You a Gentleman! mary come up, I wonder where you were bred ?

I am fure fuch Words do not become a Man of your Cloth,

I would not give fuch Language to a Dog, faith and

Yes

troth.

; you call'd my ridan, 'tis a Shame

Mafter a Knave: Fie Mr. She

For a Parfon, who fhou'd know better Things, to come out with fuch a Name.

Knave in your Teeth, Mr. Sheridan, 'tis both a Shame and a Sin,

And the Dean my Mafter is an honefter Man than and all your Kin:

you

He has more Goodness in his little Finger, than you have in your whole Body,

My Master is a parfonable Man, and not a spindleThank'd hoddy-doddy.

And now whereby I find you would fain make an Excufe,

Because my Master one Day in Anger call'd you

Goose.