John. If it please you; yet Count Claudio may hear; for, what I would speak of, concerns him. Pedro. What's the matter? John. Means your lordship to be marry'd to mor row? Pedro. You know, he does. [To Claudio. John. I know not that, when he knows what I know. Claud. If there be any impediment, I pray you, dif cover it. John. You may think, I love you not; let that appear hereafter; and aim better at me by That I now will manifeft; for my brother, I think, he holds you well, and in dearness of heart hath holp to effect your enfuing marriage; furely, Suit ill spent, and Labour ill bestow'd! Pedro. Why, what's the matter? John. I came hither to tell you, and circumstances shorten'd, (for she hath been too long a talking of) the Lady is disloyal. Claud. Who? Hero ? John. Even the; Leanato's Hero, your Hero, every man's Hero. Claud. Difsloyal? John. The word is too good to paint out her wickedness; I could say, she were worse, think you of a worse title, and I will fit her to it; wonder not 'till further warrant; go but with me to night, you shall fee her chamber-window enter'd, even the night before her wedding day; if you love her, then to morrow wed her; but it would better fit your honour to change your mind. Claud. May this be so? Pedro. I will not think it. John. If you dare not trust that you fee, confess not that you know; if you will follow me, I will shew you enough; and when you have seen more and heard more, proceed accordingly. Claud. If I see any thing to night why I should not marry her to morrow; in the Congregation, where I should wed, there will I shame her. Pedre. Pedro. And as I wooed for thee to obtain her, I will join with thee to disgrace her. John. I will disparage her no farther, 'till you are my witnesses; bear it coldly but 'till night, and let the issue shew it felf. Pedro. O day untowardly turned ? Claud. O mischief strangely thwarting! So you will fay, when you have seen the sequel. SCENE changes to the Street. [Exeunti Enter Dogberry and Verges, with the Watch: Dogb. A RE you good men and true ? Verg. Yea, or else it were pity but they should suffer salvation, body and foul. Dogb. Nay, that were a punishment too good for them, if they should have any allegiance in them, being chosen for the Prince's Watch. Verg. Well, give them their charge, neighbour Dogberry. Dogb. First, who think you the most desartless man to be conftable! Watch. Hugh Oatecake, Sir, or George Seacole; for they can write and read. Dogb. Come hither, neighbour Seacole: God hath bleft you with a good name; and to be a well-favour'd man is the gift of fortune, but to write and read comes by nature. 2 Watch. Both which, master conftable Dogb. You have: I knew, it would be your answer! Well, for your Favour, Sir, why, give God thanks, and make no boast of it; and for your writing and reading, let that appear when there is no need of fuch vanity: you are thought here to be the most senseless and fit man for the Constable of the Watch, therefore bear you the lanthorn; this is your charge: you shalt comprehend all vagrom men; you ase to bid any man stand, in the Prince's name. 2 Watch. : 2 Watch. How if he will not stand? Dogb. Why, then take no note of him, but let him go; and presently call the rest of the Watch together, and thank God you are rid of a knave. Verg. If he will not stand when he is bidden, he is none of the Prince's Subjects. Dogb. True, and they are to meddle with none but the Prince's Subjects: you shall also make no noise in the streets; for, for the Watch to babble and talk, is most tolerable, and not to be endur'd. 2 Watch. We will rather fleep than talk; we know what belongs to a Watch. Dogb. Why, you speak like an ancient and most quiet watchman, for I cannot see how Sleeping should offend; only have a care that your Bills be not stolen: well, you are to call at all the ale-houses, and bid them that are drunk get them to bed. 2 Watch. How if they will not? Dogb. Why then let them alone 'till they are sober; if they make you not then the better answer, you may fay, they are not the men you took them for. 2 Watch. Well, Sir. Dogb. If you meet a thief, you may suspect him by vertue of your office to be no true man; and for fuch kind of men, the less you meddle or make with them, why, the more is for your honesty. 2 Watch. If we know him to be a thief, shall we not lay hands on him ? Dogb. Truly, by your office you may; but, I think, they that touch pitch will be defil'd: the most peaceable way for you, if you do take a thief, is, to let him fhew himself what he is, and steal out of your company. Verg. You have been always call'd a merciful man, Partner. Dogb. Truly, I would not hang a dog by my will, much more a man who hath any honesty in hit. Verg. If you hear a child cry in the night, you must call to the nurse and bid her ftill it. 2 Watch. How if the nurse be asleep, and will not Dogb. Dogb. Why, then depart in Peace, and let the child wake her with crying for the ewe that will not hear her lamb when it baes, will never answer a calf when he bleats. hear us? Verg. 'Tis very true. Dogb. This is the end of the Charge: you, conftable, are to present the Prince's own perfon, if you meet the Prince in the night, you may stay him. Verg. Nay, birlady, that, I think, he cannot. Dogb. Five shillings to one on't with any man that knows the Statues, he may stay him; marry, not without the Prince be willing: for, indeed, the Watch ought to offend no man; and it is an offence to stay a man against his will. Verg. Birlady, I think, it be fo. Dogb. Ha, ha, ha! well, masters, good night: an there be any matter of weight chances, call up me; keep your fellow's counsels and your own, and good night; come, neighbour. 2 Watch. Well, masters, we hear our charge; let us go fit here upon the church-bench 'till two, and then all to bed. Dogb. One word more, honeft neighbours. I pray you, watch about Signior Leonato's door, for the Wedding being there to morrow, there is a great coil ta night; adieu; be vigilant, I beseech you. [Exeunt Dogberry and Verges Enter Borachio and Conrade. Bora. What? Conrade. Watch. Peace, ftir not. Bora. Conrade, I say. Conr. Here, Man, I am at thy elbow. [Afide Bora. Mass, and my elbow itch'd, I thought there would a scab follow. Conr. I will owe thee an answer for that, and now forward with thy tale. Bora. Stand thee close then under this pent house, for it drizzles rain, and I will, like a true drunkard, utter all to thee. Watch Watch. Some Treason, masters; yet stand close. Bora. Therefore know, I have earned of Don John a thousand ducats. Conr. Is it possible that any Villany should be fo dear? Bora. Thou should'st rather ask, if it were possible any villany should be so rich? for when rich villains have need of poor ones, poor ones may make what price they will. Conr. I wonder at it. Bora. That shews, thou art unconfirm'd; thou knowest, that the fashion of a doublet, or a hat, or a cloak is nothing to a man: Conr. Yes, it is apparel. Bora. I mean the fashion. Conr. Yes, the fashion is the fashion. Bora. Tush, I may as well say, the fool's the Fool; but fee'st thou not, what a deformed thief this fashion is? Watch. I know that Deformed; he has been a vile thief these seven years; he goes up and down like a gentleman: I remember his name. Bora. Didst thou not hear fome body ? Bora. Seest thou not, I say, what a deformed thief this fashion is? how giddily he turns about all the hotbloods between fourteen and five and thirty; sometimes, fashioning them like Pharoah's soldiers in the reachy Painting; sometimes, like the God Bel's priests in the old church-window; sometimes, like the shaven Hercules in the smirch'd worm-eaten tapestry, where his codpiece seems as massie as his club. Conr. All this I see, and fee, that the fashion wears out more apparel than the man; but art not thou thy felf giddy with the fashion too, that thou hast shifted out of thy tale into telling me of the fashion? Bora. Not so neither; but know, that I have to night wooed Margaret, the Lady Hero's Gentlewoman, by the name of Hero; the leans me out at her mistress's chamber-window, bids me a thousand times good night |