« ПредишнаНапред »
fervants should assist one another, since it is for all their Master's Honour, which is the chief Point to be consulted by every good Servant, and of which he is the best Judge.
When you step but a few Doors off to tattle with a Wench, or take a running Pot of Ale, or to see a Brother Footman going to be hanged, leave the Street-door
you may not be forced to knock, and your Master difcover you are gone out; for a Quarter of an Hour's Time can do his Honour no Injury. When
away the remaining Pieces of Bread, after Dinner, put them on foul Plates, and press them down with other Plates over them, so as nobody can touch them; and thus they will be a good Perquisite to your Blackguard-boy in ordinary.
When you are forced to clean your Master's Shoes with your own Hands, use the Edge of the sharpest Case-knife, and dry them with the Toes an Inch from the Fire, because wet Shoes are dangerous ; and, besides, by these Arts, you will get them the sooner for yourself.
In some Families the Master often sendeth to the Tavern for a Bottle of Wine, and
you are the Meslenger ; I advise you, therefore, to take the smallest Bottle you can find ; but, however, make the Drawer give you a full Quart; thus you will get a good Sup for yourself, and your Bottle will be filled.
As for a Cork to stop it, you need be at no Trouble, F 3
for your Thumb will do as well, or a Bit of dirty chewed Paper.
In all Disputes with Chairmen and Coachmen, for demanding too much, when your Master sendeth you down to chaffer with them, take Pity of the poor Fellows, and tell your Master, that they will not take a Farthing less ; it is more for your Interest to get Share of a Pot of Ale, than to save a Shilling for your Master, to whom it is a Trifle.
When you attend your Lady, in a dark Night, if she useth her Coach, do not walk by the Coach Side, so as to tire and dirty yourself, but get up into your proper Place, behind it ; and so hold your Flambeau, sloping forward, over the Coach Roof; and, when it wanteth snuffing, dash it against the Corners. When
leave your Lady at Church, on Sundays, you have two Hours fafe to spend with your Companions at the Ale-house, or over a Beef-stake and a Pot of Beer, at home, with the Cook, and the Maids; and, indeed, poor Servants have fo few Opportunities to be happy, that they ought not to lose
any Never wear Socks when you wait at Meals, on the Account of your own Health, as well as of theirs who sit at Table ; because, as most Ladies like the Smell of young Mens Toes, so it is a sovereign Remedy against the Vapours.
Chuse a Service, if you can, where your Livery-colours are least tawdry and distin
guishing : guishing : Green and Yellow immediately betray your Office; and so do all Kinds of Lace, except Silver, which will hardly fall to your Share, unless with a Duke, or some Prodigal just come to his Eftate.
The Colours you ought to wish for, are Blue, or Filemot, turned up
with Red; which, with a borrowed Sword, a borrowed Air, your Master's Linen, and a natural and improved Confidence, will give you what Title you please, where you are not known.
When you carry Dishes, or other Things, out of the Room, at Meals, fill both your Hands as full as possible ; for, although you may sometimes spill, and sometimes let fall, yet you will find, at the Year's End, you have made great Dispatch, and saved Abundance of Time.
If your Master, or Mistress, happen to walk the Streets, keep on one side, and as much on the Level with them as you can, which People observing, will either think
do not be long to them, or that you are one of their Companions ; but, if either of them happen to turn back, and speak to you, so that you are under the Necessity to take off your Hat, use but
your Thumb and one Finger, and scratch your Head with the rest.
In Winter-time light the Dining-room Fire but two Minutes before Dinner is served
up, that your Mistress may see, how saving you are of her Coals.
When you are ordered to stir up the Fire, clean away the Ashes, from between the Bars, with the Fire-brush.
When you are ordered to call a Coach, although it be Midnight, go no further than the Door, for fear of being out of the Way when you are wanted ; and there stand bawling, Coach, Coach, for half an Hour.
Although you Gentlemen, in Livery, have the Misfortune to be treated scurvily, by all Mankind, yet you make a Shift to keep up your Spirits, and sometimes arrive at considerable Fortunes. I was an intimate Friend to one of our Brethren, who was a Footman to a Court Lady; she had an honourable Employment, was Sister to an Earl, and the Widow of a Man of Quality : She observed fomething so polite in my Friend, the Gracefulness with which he tripped before her Chair, and put his Hair under his Hat, that she made him many Advances ; and one Day, taking the Air in her Coach, with Tom behind it, the Coachman mistook the Way, and stopped at a priviledged Chapel, where the Couple were married, and Tom came home in the Chariot by his Lady's Side : But he unfortunately taught her to drink Brandy, of which she died, after having pawned all her Plate to purchase it ; and Tom is now a Journeyman Malfter.
Boucher, the famous Gamester, was another of our Fraternity; and, when he was worth thirty thousand Pounds, dunned the Duke of
Bm for an Arrear of Wages in his Service: And I could instance many more; particularly another, whose Son had one of the chief Employments at Court, and is sufficient to give you the following Advice; which is, to be pert and saucy to all Mankind, especially to the Chaplain, the Waiting-woman, and better Sort of Servants, in a Person of Quality's Family; and value not now and then a Kicking, or a Caning; for, your Insolence will, at last, turn to good Account, and, from wearing a Livery, you may probably soon carry a Pair of Colours.
When you wait behind a Chair, at Meals, keep constantly wriggling the Back of the Chair, that the Perfon behind whom you stand, may know you are ready to attend him.
When you carry a Parcel of China Plates, if they chance to fall, as it is a frequent Misfortune, your Excuse must be, that a Dog ran across you in the Hall; that the Chamber, maid accidentally pushed the Door against you ; that a Mop stood across the Entry, and tripped you up;
your Sleeve stuck against the Key, or Button of the Lock.
When your Master and Lady are talking together in their Bed-chamber, and you have fome Suspicion, that you, or your Fellow-fervants, are concerned in what they say, listen at the Door, for the publick Good of all the Servantş ; and join all, to take proper Measures,