AFFECTION TO KINDRED.

This advice I must carry also into my next particular that concerns your kindred, which, for the former reasons, you must also labour to preserve in amity, at least the major and better part of them, and it will require a very good skill, but once happily effected, it must needs bring you great reputation. Let Let your outward deportment be full of respect to all your kindred, but reserve to yourself a secret mark and character of each. And take heed of suffering them to come within you, yet thrust them not off: gentleness, but managed with discretion, will be sometimes necessary; yet distance and gravity must presently step in to secure it from presumption, and protect it from abuse. I should say more concerning this, but I refer to my more secret instructions, where you shall have, God enabling me, a particular of those friends and servants to your family, whose counsels you may follow, and whose service you may

trust.

you

Frank, you are now setting your foot into the world, but before you place it, look about you, and consider that you can hardly set it but upon a snare, or a thorn, which calls upon you both for care, and courage: with these, take my experience for your guide; and, if you follow not

VOL. II.

my directions exactly, which frees you from all danger, yet tread as near as you; can you shall suffer the less; slip you may, fall you cannot.

MANNERS.

I have observed that the greatest mischief to our manners, proceeds from a mistake of the nature of things; learn, therefore, first to make a right judgment of things; esteem not a feather, and slight a jewel; know that nothing is beautiful, great, or your own, but only virtue and piety; riches are not, great revenues, noble houses, money, or plate; but not to want that which is necessary to support a moderate and ingenuous condition. That glory, is to hear well for doing good; honour, a reverence for being virtuous; power and command, an ability to oblige noble persons; nobility, heroic actions, or to be like noble ancestors; generosity, a natural inclination to virtue; health, such a constitution of the body as renders the mind vigorous; beauty, a fair soul lodged in no unhandsome body; strength, not to be weary in virtuous actions; pleasure, those pure, firm, lasting delights, which arise from those things alone which belong to the understanding and soul. All which definitions of things are clean contrary to the vulgar conceptions, and, con ́sequently, not to be expected in their practice.

Thy birth, Frank, hath separated thee from the people; let thy actions also carry thee, and raise thee above them; suspect all things they admire; neither think their opinion, nor live their manners. They know not how to set upon each thing its due price and value; learn you to do it, and accustom thyself betimes to entertain right and sound opinions, that they may grow up with thee, and by using thyself to think well, thou mayst soon come to do well; and by frequency of well doing it will, it may, at last become so habitual and natural, as that thou canst not but do well, thou canst not do otherwise; or if at any time you do ill, it may appear to be by constraint, or force, rather than from inclination. After you are able to judge of things, and hath kept off the servile yoke which opinion hath laid upon most men, by imposing false names, and governing the world by that cheat, and that you can plainly see a rich man to want those things which he has, and a high content in poverty, discern a great man in all his liberty, chained like a slave to his lusts and idleness, and another free in his fetters: this done, to fit you for conversation, receive these following directions. First, because the eye doth make the first report of the man, and as she tells her tale, so for the most part the presence is liked or disliked (sometimes very unjustly), to avoid prejudice, be sure to

let

put yourself into good fashion; and, without flattery, I may tell you, but do not hear it without thankfulness to God, you have a body every way fit to bear a graceful presence, answerable to your rank and quality. But take heed of affectation and singularity, lest you act the nobleman instead of being one. And whether you stand, sit or move, let it be with such a becoming, pleasing gravity, as that your very behaviour may commend you, and prevail for a good opinion with the beholder. Before you speak, your mind be full of courtesy; the civility of the hat, a kind look, or word from a person of honour, has brought that service which money could not. And he that can gain or preserve a friend, and the opinion of civility, for the moving of the hat, or a gentle look, and will not, is sillily severe; spare not to spend that which costs nothing; be liberal of them, but be not prodigal, lest they become cheap. I remember Sir Francis Bacon calls behaviour the garment of the mind; it is well resembled, and rightly expresses the behaviour I would have in proportion to a garment. It must be fit, plain, and rich, useful and fashionable. Frank, I should not have advised you to such a regard of your outside, the most trifling part of man, did I not know how much the greatest part of the world are guided by it, and what notable advantages

are gained thereby, even upon some very wise men; the request of an acceptable person being seldom, or at least unwillingly, denied. Yet take heed of minding your behaviour too much, lest it pilfer from your consideration, and hinder action. It is at best but a letter of commendation, or like a master of ceremonies, presents you to have audience. If something be not well said or done, you are but a handsome picture, the pageant or show of a man,

LANGUAGE.

The next thing that fits you for conversation, and is, indeed, chiefly to be laboured for, is a graceful manner of speaking in a distinct, welltuned voice, without stammering, lisping, stopping, or repetition. And let these be your rules and caution in discourse; be sparing of speech; some do it to be suspected for wise men, yet do you speak sometimes that you may not be thought a fool. But let the little you utter be very much to the purpose, and, therefore, frame it within, before you set it forth, still observing the point of your discourse, and go to that directly. If it be a knot, untie it skilfully; always have respect to a grey-haired experience, and famed understanding, if such a one be present,

2d. Let your language be clear, proper, signi ficant, and intelligible, fitted to the subject,