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239 PRESS, OF, THE POLICE OFFICES Though spice-breathing gales o'er his caravan hover,

And around him Arabia's whole fragrance descends, The merchant still thinks of the woodbines that cover

The bow'r where he sat with-wife, children, and friends. Though valour still glows in his life's dying embers,

The death wounded tar,' who his colours defends, Drops a rear of regret, as he dying remeinbers

How blest was his home with-wife, children, and friends. The dayspring of youth, still onclouded by sorrow,

Alone on itself for enjoyment dependis; But drear is the twilight of age, if it borrow

No warmth from the smiles of-wife, children, and friends

ON COLONEL WARDLE DISPUTING THE

VERACITY OF MRS. CLARKE.

[From the British Press, Sept. 1.] c OLONEL 'Wardle declares he is griev'd to remark,

"No liar is equal to Mary Anne Clarke:" For rivals to judge of each other is whim! Her folly appears to be--lying with him. f

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DRESS OF THE POLICE OFFICES.,,

(From the General Evening Post, Sept. a), SIR, THE importance of dress cannot admit of a ques. world to agitate it at a time when the reports of fashion are made in monthly portions, and a regular system is established, by which the most distant parts of the kingdom are become nearly as wise as ihose in the vicinity of the metropolis. I can also forgive the minute descriptions of the dresses of a birthday, of a grand rout, of a marriage in high life, or of a distin, guished actress in a new comedy. Involved as we are, in a war of infinite perplexity and apprehension, Ji would not deprive the gay world of a species of intel

ligence

DRESS OF THB POLICE OFFICES,

231 ligence which they very naturally prefer to bulletins and Gazettes, batiles and retreats, urmistices and nee, gotiations.

. But, Sir, while I make all this allowance, I hope I may be permitted to animadvert on a species of intelligence respecting dress, which has lately crept into Qur fashionable papers,

and which I cannot trace to any principle of utility. I allude, Sir, to the very mimie accounts these papers give us of the dress of persons who happen to be brought before the sitting magis. trates for various offences. There appears to me to be something in that kind of situation which would naturally lead the mind to considerations of a more serious kind than the forms of dress, nor does that very particular description of person appear of more importance. Yet within this week we have a very striking instance of the information to which I object. -A lady who has been so unfortunate as to incur the suspicion of forgery, is thus portrayed :

. She appeared to be from thirty-five to forty years of age, dressed in black, and above the middle size, inclined to fesh: although we cannot call her handsomne, her countenance is expressive and pleasing.”

Now, Sir, although the age of this lady may be an , information of some utility, yet I am puzzled to conceive of what use it can be, in cases of forgery, to know whether the accused be dressed in black or white, whether above the middle size, or greatly under it; a Maypole, or a dwarfs whether inclined to flesh. (as it is very elegantly expressed here), or inclined to Jone : As to this portrait-painter ' not being able to call 'her handsome,' 1 allow that in some cases this might be a subject of regret; and in no case should an accusation of so serious a nature be brought, especially at a first examination, although perhaps it may be thought that an “ expressive and pleasing countenance" is sonie apology. But what has all this to do

with

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232 DRE93 OP THE POLICE OFFICES. with the forgery? Are persons who unfortunately come into this situation to be convicted by their dress? Is it more or less suspicious that they are above the middle size? Or are they to be pronounced guilty mpon the circumstantial evidence of fat and lean? Will the counsel, when this matter comes to a trial, insist upon these particulars, begin with the bonnet or hat, proceed to the laced shirt, thence to gown or pelisse, and wind up his arguments in an affecting appeal to the height and breadth of his client?-Will the jury acquit because the countenance is “ pleasing and expressive?" or will they pronounce a verdict of guilty, merely because i they cannot call her handsome?"

I repeat it, Sir, that I am no enemy to the gratification of popular curiosity in matters of dress, and can therefore tolerate the description, however tedious, of a court dress, a rout dress, an opera dress, or even a Park dress; but really, Sir, when we come to Bow Street, or Marlborough Street, to Hicks's Hall, or the Old Bailey, I cannot help thinking that we have matters to altend to of more importance than the dress of the person's brought for examination or trial. No law of fashion has yet established a costume either for capital offences or petty larceny; and wbile our magistrates, our judges, our juries, and our barristers, are exercising their very serious functions, and deciding on the life, liberty, or reputation of their fellow-creatures, they will not be much disposed to examine the size of the prisoner, nor pay attention to. “ the round robe of jacconot muslin," the “fine worked laced tippet," or " the spencer boddiee of pale pink satin."

I am, Sir, yotirs,

ANTI-FRIVOLOUS.

NEW

( 233 )

NEW VOCABULARY.
{From the Morning Chronicle, Sept. 5-1

The present age wants a new dictionary most damnably."

PLAY OF JOHN BULL. ADMINISTRATION.-A partition treaty, among

ten or twelve noblemen or gentlemen, of different political principles, to share all the great offices of the state, and to support each other in the possession of them under all circumstances.

Allies.--Nations who unite in the prosecution of a war in which each has separate, if not opposite, interests.

Cornbined Forces. An army composed of two distinct classes--1. The combatants-2. The spectators.

Subsidy.-Three or more millions paid to any continental prince on the eve of his ruin.

A splendid and immortal victory.-A temporary repulse given to the enemy, with immense slaughter upon both sides.

A retreat.-Taking a new position.

A defent.--A slight check, cannon, camp equipage, and wounded, not taken-only left behind.

Parliamentary Reform.-A most desirable thing imperiously calling for discussion ; dangerous, however, to be discussed in time of war, and inexpedient to be discussed in time of peace; therefore, not to be discussed ai all.

Jacobin.-Any person who opposes His Majesty's present Ministers.

Opposition. Jacobins.

Church' and state.---The Rev. Spencer Perceval, Doctor Duigenan, and the bench of Bishops.

Liberty of the press.--Liberty of praising Ministers and libelling their opponents.-Vide Gibbs's Reporis, vol. i. King v. Harte and White.

Existing circumstances --Any public disaster that happened ten or twenty years ago, kept alive as a pre

lencc*

234

THE CONTRAST. tence for a change of opinion, id est, giving up principles without giving up place. Delicate investigation.-A very indelicate inquiry. Corruption. --Influence.

Energy.--Sending a large army to a distant country, and leaving them to starve upon their own energies.

Decision.-Sending Lord Chatham peremptory or Scrs to wait for further orders.

Dispatch. Equipping an expedition all the time it might be of use, and then, when that time bas expired, å telegraph order for the baggage to hold themselves in readiness the moment the wind shifts.

Eloquence.Prose epigrams without point, and Latin quotations without application,

Fundamental feature. -A pretty nonsense alliteration to come in (when speaking in the House), if nothing else will N. B. Most earnestly recommended by Lord Castlereagb.

Keen satire... The philippics of the Morning Post against its contemporaries.

Sunt quibus in satyris nimis acer.HOR. An independent writer. Ex. gr. Mr. Wharton, who, independent of granımar or common sense, wrote down the Edinburgh Review.

A disinterested servant of the public.--Ex. gr. George Rose.

A tried servant of the public. E. G. Lord Melville

THE CONTRAST.

[From the British Press, Sept. 6)
-NN-G has wit, but wisdom's strain

In C-nn-ng we must seek in vain :
Hear him once argue, and you 'll find
A new distinction in your mind;
A new distinction, marking clear 1

..
What argument and reason areçaritia

97 yir'?h3 70 17,1 big And

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