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THE EXPEDITION.

145

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And Master Punch, to mend the joke,
(Who's here with all his motley folk,)
Begg?d, for the Colonel's tricks in town,
To show them some as good-his own.
So gave the farce a kind of jumble-
He nick-nam'd" Lucifer's grand tumble;"
Where, patriot-like, in brimstone breeches,
Strutted an imp, and made fine speeches ;
With flaming eyes and beak for nose,
And claws and tale as false as those,
Were sported once amongst the members;
And which with shame each man remembers.
'T was done so well--the wicked elf
Throughout appear'd like Wardle's self;
And when by unforeseen descent
The trap gave way, and down he went !
'T was all so natural-none can telle
But he was gone--where you can spell.
While all, as the reward of evil,
Approv'd his going to the d.

In short, to close this humbug stuff,
A penny box-a candle-snuff

-
Would say the whole of England's debt,
Had Wardle to receive it yet.
Nay, more-as Mayor have I 10 boasi
Last feast I gave a certain toast
A certain toast; but, not t'alarm ye,

.6 The Duke of York and Army :"
Which (now from all delusion free)
We drank, and cheer'd with three times three,

It was

THE EXPEDITION.

(From the British Press, July 26.]
A MAID, reluctant to become the mate

Of one who joins the expedition straight;
Objected, from opinion, that so soon
The calls of war must break the honey-moon.
He, better skill'd in ministerial taste,
Assur'd the maid of dilatory haste;
Told her that mighty minds move slowly on,
While after them lags lazy expedition.

The

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146

IMPROMPTU.
The maid complies, he clasps her to his arms,
No sudden mandate wrests him from her charms;
He views the fleet, secure of favouring gales,
And takes a house by lease until it sails.

MRS. CLARKE'S CATECHISM.

(From the Public Ledger.] WHAT makes all questions plain and clear ?

About-five hundred pounds a-year. What proves that falsea-prov'd trud before? Why-just about five hundred more.

IMPROMPTU.

[From the Morning Post.] WARDLE forbear, th' indictment must be strong, That proves to demonstration, Wright is wrong:

G.B.

A SKETCH FOR A NATIONAL PICTURE

UT PICTURA POESIS.

(From the same, July 31.)
If a painter the patriot of patriots would draw,

Enforcing our claims, and propounding the law!
Let the look be imposing, the attitude bolet
While his hand a new plan of reform would unfold:
For the names of old deeds and great charters he slights,
And his hand would be palsied to touch-Bill of Wright's

.

IMPROMPTU.

{From the same.) POOR Wardle has vow'd his dear Clarke he'll indict, But he's all in the wrong, she's supported by

ght. W. E.

AS KETCH

( 147 )

A SKETCH FOR A CARICATURE.

Scene, Paris,
An old Citizen and his Wife reading the late Bulletins.

[From the same.] Madame (Reading). Oh! the great fight of Marengo was

kept up by the victory of Raab. Cit. Don't you believe it, my deary; 't is only our Emperor's

gab.

*** When we had printed thus far, there fell into our hands an octavo voluine, the contents of which had been periodically published at Bath, under the title of « Le PAPILLON; or, The Fashionable Trifter, and Bath Censor.” As this work, we believe, never obtained any circulation in London (perhaps on account of the locality, generally speaking, of its satire), we shall make a selection from it of such articles as we think will best bear transplanting, Those to which we affix ** are ascribed to the pen of John Peter Roberdeau, Esq. of Baili, by the friend who was kind enough to lend us the volume.

LETTER I.
FROM MR. DASHAWAY TO THE EDITOR OF THE

PAPILLON.
OLD PARAGRAPH,

HAVING found among the knowing ones, that

your filley PAPILLON is likely to be the favourite thing, and will be taken against the field, I have sported some hundreds upon its success ; so I now give you a few hints for its improvement; for much is still wanting, notwithstanding the noble sport of your last Chase. In the first place, you want a corresponde ent to report from the clubs, and Tattersall's bettingroom; and if you will accept my services, I say done first ! Give us some Crim. Con. cases, rich and racy, old H 2

boy: 148

USEFUL RECEIPTS.

boy: we expect of course all the elopements, whether they end in a fortnight's frolic, or a morning visit to old Fullbottom and his man Amen : 't is your duty, and of all publishers, to improve the morals of the age, you know. In your poetry give us some deep-coloured songs, and be sure to quiz the parsons who come to wash away their wine with the Bath waters. Observe to be devilish exact in describing boxing-matches; give us all the new blows, the eye-clasers, the stomachers, the breath-pumpers, and so on. Pick up a sound course of training, to enable a man to walk down five post-horses.-Sport the playhouses, managers, actors, pieces, and all.-Ironmask against Shakspeare-done for a hundred : Bath Italian operas against all plays past, present, and to come! Music's the crack; Catalani 's the go~ That's your sort-Two sweepstakes-Runs double heat and comes in with her weight! I'll back her for what they dare-A fine going thing.--A deal of foot-feels the lit-goes in a snaffle--leaps Gamut-gate at' a stand—She's the sort!

Insert this letter to save me from being done up, as I have taken the long odds with Lord Littlecash, that it appears in your next number-If you bring me through, expect a second letter from Yours, niy worthy Penscraper,

DICKY DASHAWAY, Roary Hall, Turf Common, Feb. 13, 1809.

USEFUL RECEIPTS, NOT TO BE FOUND IN DR. BYCHAN, OR THE LONDON

DISPENSATOKY.

A Cure for an obstinate and lad IPar. TAKE

KE of Ministers of State a large handful of

Contractors and Commissaries as many as can be found of Stock Brokers quantum suff, and place the . whole in the front of every bat!lc.

T

USEFUL RECEIPTS.

149 To prevent wrong Verdicts and promote Justice.

Take of Fox's Bill, a paper full-Common Sense and Impartiality, equal parts--Sprinkle these with a Juryman's Oath, and let them be taken at going into Court.

Aurum palpabile, or tangible Gold. This specific may be justiy called a Panpharmacoa, or universal medicine: it is adnrinistered with unfailing effect in political disorders. The rabies patriotica for patriotic furor) has often yielded to this remedy, even when patients have been so far gone as to behow, foam at the mouth, and clench their fists-a proper strong dose always abates the paroxysm ; their mouths close, their stamping subsides, and they tractably follow the Alministrator, in and out, left or right. The Bath Epistolarium Sapiens Recipe.- A new Drug.

Take of the essence of Clericalis inflatus, 'THREB ounces of the oil of Medicus primarius one ounce -of the powder of Laïcus Hetlingo and Laicus Liverp. TWO ounces, equal quantities : in all-six ounces. Pound then in a mortar of Arrogantia marble, with a Pestle of Audacia wood, until they are sufficiently mixed; colour the mass with the rectified spirit of Poplicola, and you may advantageously dispense and circulate it through the GLOBE.

N. B. This excellent new drug was said to have suddenly acquired so much fame, as to have become celebrated and noticed very far beyond the Rev. Dr. Baraclay's Gout Pills, which only carry the approving testimonials of about a dozen members of the legislature ; while the present article (as was said) had attracted the inquiries of more than six hundred noble commoners, who had not only sought a personal interview with the compounders and inventors, but had besides honoured them with a SERJEANT'S GUARD with arms, for their safe journey to London; and during their being detained there on the business. It

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was

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