My footman came home from the church of a bruise fick,

And look'd like a rake, who was made in the stews fick;

But

you, learned doctors, can make whom you chufe fick.

Poor I myself I was, when I withdrew, fick.

20

For the fmell of them made me like Garlic and rue

fick.

And I got through the croud, though not led by a clue fick.

You hop'd to find many (for that was your cue)

fick:

But there were not a dozen (to give 'em their due)

fick,

And thofe, to be fure, ftuck together like glue,

fick.

25

So are ladies in crouds, when they fqueeze and they fcrew, fick.

You may find they are all, by their yellow pale hue, fick;

So am I, when tobacco, like Robin, I chew, fick.

This night I came home with a very cold dew fick,
And I wish I may foon be not of an ague fick ;
But I hope I shall ne'er be, like you, of a fhrew fick,
Who often has made me, by looking afcue, fick. 5

A

THE

HE dulleft beaft, and gentleman's liquor,
When young, is often due to the vicar.

The dullest of beafts, and fwines delight,
Make up a bird very swift of flight.

The dullest beast when high in stature,
And another of royal nature,
For breeding is a useful creature.

The dulleft beast, and a party distrest,
When too long, is bad at best.

The dullest beast, and the faddle it wears,
Is good for partridge, not for hares.

The dulleft beast and kind voice of a cat,
Will make a horse go, though he be not fat.

The dulleft of beasts and of birds in the air,
Is that by which all rifhmen fwear.

The dulleft beaft and fam'd college for Teagues,
Is a perfon very unfit for intrigues.

The dulleft beast and a cobler's tool,

10

15

ith a boy that is only fit for a fchool, mmer is very pleafant and cool.

20}

The

The dulleft beast, and that which you kifs,
May break a limb of mafter or miss.

Of ferpent-kind, and what at distance kills,
Poor Mistress Dingley oft hath felt its bills.

The dulleft beast, and eggs unfound,
Without it I rather would walk on the ground.

The dulleft beast, and what covers a house,
Without it a writer is not worth a louse.

The dulleft beaft, and fcandalous vermin,

25

Of roaft or boil'd, to the hungry is charming. 30

The dulleft beaft, and what's cover'd with cruft,
There's no body but a fool that would trust.

The dullest beast mending highways,
Is to a horse an evil difeafe.

The dullest beast, and a hole in the ground,
Will drefs a dinner worth five pound.

35

The dulleft beaft, and what doctors pretend
The cook-maid often has by the end.

The dulleft beaft, and fifh for lent,

May give you a blow you'll for ever repent.

40

The dullest beast, and a fhameful jeer,
Without it a lady should never appear.

Wednesday night.

I writ all thefe before I went to bed. Pray explain them for me, because I cannot do it.

PROBA

A

PROBATUR ALITER

Long-ear'd beaft, and a field-houfe for cattle,
Among the coals does often rattle.

A long-ear'd beaft, a bird that prates,
The bridegroom's firft gift to their mates,
Is by all pious Chriftians thought,

In clergymen the greatest fault.

A long-ear'd beaft, and woman of Endor, If your wife be a fcold, that will mend her. With a long-ear'd beast and medicines use, Cooks make their fowl look tight and fpruce. 10 A long-eard beaft, and holy fable, Strengthens the fhoes of half the rabble.. A long-ear'd beaft, and Rhenish wine, Lies in the lap of ladies fine.

A long-ear'd beast, and Flanders college, Is Dr. Tl to my knowledge.

A long-ear'd beaft, and building knight; Cenforious people do in fpight.

A long-ear'd beaft, and bird of night, We finners are too apt to flight.

A long-ear'd beaft, aud fhameful vermin,

A judge will eat, though clad in ermine.
A long-ear'd beaft, and Irish cart,
Can leave a mark, and give a finart.
A long-ear'd beast in mud to lie,
No bird in air fo fwift can fly.

A long-ear'd beast, and a sputt'ring old Whig,

I wish he were in it, and dancing a jig

A long-ear'd beaft, and liquor to write,

15

20

25

Is a damnable smell both morning and night. 30 A long-ear'd beaft, and the child of a theep, At whift they will make a desperate fweep.

A long.

5

A long-ear'd beaft, and till midnight you stay, Will cover a house much better than clay. A long-ear'd beaft, and the drink you love beft, You call him a floven in earnest or jeft.

A long-ear'd beast, and the fixteenth letter, I'd not look at all, unless I look'd better.

A long-car'd beast give me, and eggs unfound, Or elfe I will not ride one inch of ground.

A long-ear'd beaft, another name for jeer, To ladies fkins there's nothing comes fo near. A long-ear'd beaft, and kind nofe of a cat, Is ufeful in journeys, take notice of that.

36

40

A long-ear'd beast, and what seasons your beef, On fuch an occafion the law gives relief.

46

A long-ear'd beast, a thing that force must drive in,

Bears up his houfe, that's of his own contriving.

TOM's metamorphofis into a POET and SPANIEL.

ΤΟΜ was a little merry grig,

Fiddled and dance'd to his own jig ; Good-natur'd, but a little filly,

Irrefolute, and fhally-fhilly:

What he should do he could not guess:
They mov'd him like a man at chefs.
Swift told him once that he had wit:
Swift was in jeft, poor Tom was bit;
Thought himself fon of fecond Phoebus.
For ballad, pun, lampoon, and rebus.
He took a draught of Helicon,
But fwallow'd fo much water down,
He got a dropfy: now they fay 'tis
Turn'd to poetic diabetes;

5

10

And