bed, till they got him to fign the ftrangeft deed, that ever you faw in your life. The methods they took to manage him I will tell you another time; at prefent I will read only the writing.

ARTICLES OF AGREEMENT Betwixt JOHN BULL, Clothier, and NICHOLAS FROG, Linen-draper *..

I. THAT for maintaining the ancient good correspondence and friendship between the faid par ties, I Nicholas Frog do folemnly engage and promife to keep peace in John Bull's family; that neither his wife, children, nor fervants give him any trouble, disturbance, or moleftation whatsoever, but to oblige them all to do their duty quietly in their respective ftations: and whereas the faid John Bull, from the affured confidence that he has in my friendship has appointed me executor of his laft will and teftament, and guardian to his children, I do undertake for me, my heirs and affigns, to see the fame duly executed and performed, and that it fhall be unalterable in all its parts, by John Bull, or any body elfe: for that purpose it fhall be lawful and allowable for me to enter his houfe at any hour of the day or night; to break open bars, bolts, and doors, chefts of drawers, and ftrong boxes, in order to fecure the peace of my friend John Bull's family, and to fee his will duly executed.

II. In confideration of which kind neighbourly office of Nicholas Frog, in that he has been pleased

a treaty which had been concluded by the Lord Townshend at the Hague between the Queen and the States, in 1709, for fecuring the proteftant fucceffion, and for fettling a barrier for Holland against France. And it was refolved, that several articles of this treaty were deftructive to the trade and intereft of Great Britain, that Lord Townshend had no authority to agree to them, and that he and all those who advised ratifying the treaty, were enemies to their counwy.

to accept of the aforefaid truft, I John Bull, having duly confidered, that my friend, Nicholas Frog, at this time lives in a mai fhy foil and unwholfome air, infefted with fogs and damps, deftructive of the health of himself, wife, and children; do bind and oblige me, my heirs and affigns, to purchase for the faid Nicholas Frog, with the beft and readieft of my cafh, bonds, mortgages, goods, and chattles, a landed eftate, with parks, gardens, palaces, rivers, fields, and outlets, confifting of as large extent as the faid Nicholas Frog fhall think fit. And whereas the faid Nicholas Frog is at prefent hemmed in too close by the grounds of Lewis Baboon, mafter of the fcience of defence, I the faid John Bull do oblige myself, with the readieft of my cash, to purchase and inclofe the faid grounds, for as many fields and acres as the faid Nicholas fhall think fit; to the extent that the faid Nicholas may have free egrefs and regrefs, without lett or moleftation, fuitable to the demands of himfelf and family.

III. Furthermore, the faid John Bull obliges mfelf to make the country neighbours of Nicholas Frog, allot a certain part of yearly rents to pay for the repairs of the faid landed eftate, to the intent that his good friend Nicholas Frog may be eafed of all charges.

IV. And whereas the faid Nicholas Frog did contract with the deceased Lord Strutt about cer tain liberties, privileges, and immunities, formerly in the poffeffion of the faid John Bull; I the faid John Bull do freely by thefe prefents, renounce, quit, and make over to the faid Nicholas, the liberties, privileges, and immunities contracted for, in as full a manner as if they never had belonged

to me.

V. The faid John Bull obliges himself, his heirs and affigns, not to fell one rag of broad or coarse cloth to any gentleman within the neighbourhood

of

of the faid Nicholas, except in fuch quantities, and at fuch rates, as the faid Nicholas fhall think fit. Signed and fealed,

The reading of this paper put Mrs. Bull in fuch a paffion, that she fell downright into a fit, and they were forced to give her a good quantity of the spirit of hartfhorn before fhe recovered.

D. Diego. Why in fuch a paffion, coufin? confidering your circumftances at that time, I do not think this fuch an unreasonable contract You fee Frog, for all this, is religioufly true to his bargain; he fcorns to hearken to any compofition without your privacy.

Mrs. Bull. You know the contrary *. Read that letter.

[Reads the fuperfcription.] For Lewis Baboon, mafter of the noble science of defence.

I

SIR,

UNDERSTAND, that you are, at this time. treating with my friend John Bull, about reftor-ing the Lord Strutts cuftom, and befides allowing him certain privileges of parks and fifh-ponds; I wonder how you, that are a man that knows the world, can talk with that fimple fellow. He has been my bubble thefe twenty years, and, to my certain knowledge, understands no more of his own affairs than a child in fwaddling cloaths. I know he has got a fort of a pragmatical filly jade of a wife, that pretends to take him out of my hands : but you and the both will find yourselves mistaken; I will find those that shall manage her; and for

In the mean time the Dutch were fecretly negociating with France,

U 3

him,

him, he dares as well be hanged as make one ftep in his affairs without my confent. If you will give me what you promifed him, I will make all things eafy, and ftop the deeds of ejectment against Lord Strutt if you will not, take what follows: I fhall have a good action against you for pretending to rob me of my bubble. Take this warning from Your loving friend,

NIC. FROG.

I am told, coufin Diego, you are one of those that have undertaken to manage me, and that you have faid you will carry a green bag yourself, ra ther than we shall make an end of our law-suit : } will teach them and you too to manage.

D. Diego. For God's fake, Madam, why fo cho. leric? I fay this letter is fome forgery; it never en. tered into the head of that honeft man, Nic. Frog, to do any fuch thing.

Mrs. Bull. I cannot abide you: you have been railing these twenty years at Efquire South, Frog, and Hocus, calling them rogues and pickpockets, and now they are turned the honefteft fellows in the world. What is the meaning of all this?

D. Diego. Pray tell me how came you to employ this Sir Roger in your affairs, and not think of your old friend Diego.

Mrs. Bull. So, fo, there it pinches. To tell you truth, I have employed Sir Roger in feveral weighty affairs, and have found him trufty and honeft, and the poor man always fcorned to take a farthing of me. I have abundance that profefs great zeal, but they are damnable greedy of the pence. My husband and I are now in fuch circumftances, that we must be ferved upon cheaper terms than we have been.

D. Diego. Well, coufin, I find I can do no good with you; I am forry that you will ruin yourfelf by trufting this Sir Roger,

CHAP.

XXXK

CHAP. XVI..

How the guardians of the deceafed Mrs. Bull's three daughters came to John, and what advice they gave him; wherein are briefly treated, the characters of the three daughter:: alfo John Bull's anfwer to the three guardians *.

I

TOLD you in a former chapter, that Mrs. Bull, before the departed this life, had bleffed John with three daughters. I need not here repeat their names, neither would I willingly use any fcandalous reflections upon young ladies, whofe reputations ought to be very tenderly handled; but the charcters of these were fo well known in the neighbourhood, that it is doing them no injury to make a fhort description of them..

The eldest was a termagant, imperious, prodi gal, lewd, profligate wench, as ever breathed: fhe ufed to rantipole about the house, pinch the children, kick the fervants, and torture the cats and the dogs; fhe would rob her father's ftrong box, for money to give the young fellows that the was fond of the had a noble air, and fomething great in her mein, but fuch a noifome infectious breath, as threw all the fervants that dreffed her, into confumptions; if fhe fmelt to the fresheft nofegay, it would fhrivel and wither as it had been blighted: the used to come home in her cups, and break the china and the looking-glaffes: and was of fuch an irregular temper, and fo entirely given up to her paffion, that you might argue as well with the north wind, as with her Ladyfhip: fo expen

*The debates in parliament were however ftill continued. † Polemia, war.

five,