28 To knights new chofen in old time would come The country trumpet, and perhaps a drum; Now when a burgess new elect appears,
Come trainbands, horfeguards, footguards, grenadiers,
When the majority the town-clerk tells,
His honour pays the fiddles, waits, and bells:
Harangues the mob, and is as wife and great,
As the most myftic oracle of ftate.
29 When the duke's grand fon for the county ftood, His beef was fat, and his october good;
His lordship took each ploughman by the fift,
Drank to their fons, their wives and daughters kifs'd;
But when strong beer their free-born hearts inflames,
They fell him bargains, and they call him names.
28 Tibia non, ut nunc, Orichalcho vincta, tubæque
Emula, fed tenuis fimplexque foramine pauco,
Afpirare & adeffe choris erat utilis, &c.
Poftquam cœpit agros extendere victor, & urbem
Latior amplecti murus, &c.
Acceffit numerifque modifque licentia major;
Sic etiam fidibus voces crevere feveris,
Et tulit Eloquium infolitum facundia præceps;
Utiliumque fagax rerum & divina futuri
Sortilegis non difcrepuit fententia Delphis.
19 Carmine qui tragico vilem certavit ob hircum,
Incolumi gravitate jocum tentavit, eo quod
Illecebris erat & grata novitate morandus
Spectator, funclufque facris, & potus, & exlex.
Thus it is deem'd in English nobles wife
To stoop for no one reason but to rife.
30 Election matters fhun with cautious awe, O all ye judges learned in the law;
A judge by bribes as much himself degrades,
As duchefs-dowager by masquerades.
31 Try not with jefts obfcene to force a fmile,
Nor lard your speech with mother Needham's " stile;
Let not your tongue to Ωλφιεδισμα run,
And Kigiou with abhorrence shun;
Let not your looks affected words difgrace.
Nor join with filver tongue a brazen face;
30 Effutire leves indigna Tragedia verfus,
Ut feftis matrona moveri jussa diebus,
Intererit Satyris paulum pudibunda protervis.
31 Non ego inornata & dominantia nomina folum,
Verbaque, Pifones, Satyrorum fcriptor amabo;
Nec fic enitar Tragico differre colori,
Ut nihil interfit Davufne loquatur, & audax
Pythias, emunto lucrata Simone talentum:
An cuftos famulufque Dei Silenus alumni.
A lady celebrated in the Dunciad, fee b. i. 1. 324. She was a matron of great fame, and very religious in her way; whofe conftant prayer was, "that she might get enough by her profeffion to leave it off in "time, and make her peace with God." But her fate was not fo happy; for being convicted of keeping a diforderly houfe, and fet in the pillory, fhe was (to the lasting shame of all her great friends and votaries) fo ill ufed by the populace, that it put an end to her days.
Let not your hands, like tallboys be employ'd,
And the mad rant of tragedy avoid.
Juft in your thoughts, in your expreffion clear,
Neither too modeft, nor too bold appear.
32 Others in vain a like success will boast,
He speaks most easy, who has study'd most.
33 A peer's pert heir has to the commons spoke
A vile reflection, or a bawdy joke:
Call'd to the houfe of lords, of this beware,
'Tis what the bishops' bench will never bear.
Among the commons is fuch freedom shown,
They lash each other, and attack the throne;
Yet fo unfkilful or fo fearful fome,
For nine that speak there's nine-and-forty dumb.
34 When James the first, at great Britannia's helm, Rul'd this word-clipping and word-coining realm,
Speret idem, fudet multum, fruftraque laboret.
33 Ne nimium teneris juvenentur verfibus unquam,
Aut immunda crepent ignominiofaque dicta:
Offenduntur enim quibus eft equus, & pater & res,
Nec fi quid fricti ciceris probat, & nucis emptor,
Æquis accipiunt animis, donantve corona.
34 At noftri proavi Plautinos & numeros &
Laudavêre fales; nimium patienter utrumque,
Ne dicam ftulte, mirati; fi modo ego & vos
Scimus inurbanum lepido feponere dicto,
Legitimumque fonum digitis çallemus & aure.
No word to royal favour made pretence,
But what agreed in found and clash'd in sense.
Thrice happy he! how great that speaker's praise,
Whose every period look'd an hundred ways.
What then? we now with just abhorrence shun
The trifling quibble, and the school-boy's pun;
Though no great connoiffeur, I make a shift
Juft to find out a Durfey from a Swift;
I can difcern with half an eye, I hope,
Mift from Jo Addifon; from Eufden, Pope:
I know a farce from one of Congreve's plays,
And Cibber's opera from Johnny Gay's.
35 When pert Defoe y his faucy papers writ,
He from a cart was pillor'd for his wit:
By mob was pelted half a morning's space,
And rotten eggs besmear'd his yellow face;
35 Ignotum Tragicæ genus inveniffe Camœnæ
Dicitur, & plauftris vexiffe poëmata Thespis,
Quæ canerent agerentque perun&ti fæcibus ora,
Poft hunc perfonæ, pallæque repertor honesta
Æfchylus, & modicis inftravit pulpita tignis,
Et docuit magnumque loqui, nitique cothurno.
Succeffit vetus his Comedia, non fine multâ
Laude: fed in vítium libertas excidit, & vim
Dignam lege regi; lex eft accepta, chorusque
Turpiter obticuit fublato jure nocendi.
x Love in a Riddle, written in oppofition to the Beggars Opera.
y Daniel Defoe, author of Robinson Crufoe, and other pieces.
The Cenfor then improv'd the list'ning isle,
And held both parties in an artful smile.
A fcribbling crew now pinching winter brings,
That spare no earthly nor no heavenly things,
Nor church, nor ftate, nor treasurers, nor kings.
But blafphemy difpleafes all the town;
And for defying fcripture, law, and crown,
Woolfton fhould pay his fine, and lose his
36 It must be own'd the journals try all ways
To merit their refpective party's praise :
They jar in every article from Spain;
A war thefe threaten, those a peace maintain :
Though lie they will, to give them all their due,
In foreign matters, and domeftic too.
Whoe'er thou art that wou'dit a Poftman write,
Enquire all day, and hearken all the night.
Sure, Gazetteers and writers of Courants
Might foon exceed the intelligence of France;
To be out-done old England fhould refufe,
As in her arms, fo in her public news:
36 Nil intentatum noftri liquêre Poëtæ ;
Nec minimum meruête decus, veftigia Græca
Aufi deferere, & celebrare domeftica facta:
Nec virtute foret clarifve potentius armis,
Quam linguâ, Latium, fi non offenderet unum-
quemque Poëtarum limæ labor & mora.
z A character affumed by Ifaac Bickerstaff, the fictitious author of
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