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Glen. Unwillingly I did ; a nobler foe
Norv. Whom dost thou think me?
Norv. So I am
? Glen. A peasant's son, a wandering beggar boy ; At best no more, even if he speaks the truth.
Norv. False as thou art, dost thou suspect my truth ?
Glen. Thy truth! thou ’rt all a lie; and basely false Is the vain-glorious tale thou told'st to Randolph.
Norv._If I were chained, unarmed, or bedrid old,
Glen. (L.) Dost thou not know Glenalyon born to command Ten thousand slaves like thee?
Norv. Villain, no more!
(Both draw their swords.) Enter LORD RANDOLPH, R. Lord Randolph. Hold ! I command you both! the man that
stirs Makes me his foe.
Norv. (C.) Another voice than thine
Glen. Hear him, my lord; he's wondrous condescending !
Noro. Now you may scoff in safety.
Lord R. (R.) Speak not thus,
Norv. Nay, my good lord, though I revere you much,
I owe a subject's homage ; but even him
Lord R. Thus far I'll mediate with impartial voice;
Glen. I agree to this.
(LORD R. retires up.)
Norv. Think not so lightly, sir, of my resentment;
(Exeunt LORD R., GLEN., Norv., L.)
XXV. - SEEK
[Two chairs on the stage, R. C. and L. C.]
Enter MR. DEPUTY BULL, R. Enter THOMAS, L. Thomas. Here's a man, sir, come after the footman's place.
Bull. I hope he is more civil than the last fellow. Does he seem modest ? Thomas. O, yes,
he's an Irishman. Bull. Well, we are used to them in the Bull family. Let me see him.
(Exit Thomas, L.) I hope I shall be able to keep a servant, at last. They are all so provokingly saucy to me, because I have been a grocer.
Enter LOONEY MACTWOLTER, L. you
want a place! Looney. You may say that, with your own ugly mouth! Bull. My ugly mouth! You have been in service before ?
Loo. Does a duck swim ?
Loo. I lived with the Mactwolters nineteen years, and then they turned me off.
Bull. The Mactwolters! Why did they turn you off ?
. That is an awkward way of discharging a servant. Who were they?
Loo. My own beautiful father and most beautiful mother. They died of a whiskey fever, and left myself, Looney Mactwolter, heir to their estate.
Bull. They had an estate, it seems.
Bull. Umph! But they died, you say, when you were nineteen. What have you been doing ever since ?
Loo. I'm a physicianer.
Loo. Hay-making. I've a fork below; hire me, then I'll have a knife to it, and prettily I'll toss about your beef, Mr. Bull !
Bull. I don't doubt you. This fellow would make the steaks disappear, with a vengeance! What can you do as a footman ? Can you clean plate ? Loo. Clean a plate ! Botheration, man! would
you for your
kitchen-maid? I can dirty a plate with any body in the parish.
Bull. Do you think, now, Looney, you could contrive to beat a coat ?
Loo. Faith, can I, in the Connaught fashion.
Loo. With a man in it. Och! Let me alone for dusting your ould jacket, Mr. Bull!
Bull. Confound this fellow, I say !
Loo. Be aisy, and I'll warrant we'll agree. Give me what I ax, and we'll never tumble out about the
Reënter THOMAS, L. Thomas. Here's another man come after the place, I believe, sir.
Bull. Another man ! Let me see him. (Exit THOMAS, L.)
Loo. Faith, now, you 'll bother yourself betwixt us. You 'l be like a cat in a tripe-shop, and not know where to choose.
hire me SEEKING SERVICE.
Enter JOHN LUMP, L.
Lump. O! if you are nothing but the deputy, I'll bide here till I see Mr. Bull himself.
Bull. Blockhead! I am himself — Mr. Deputy Bull.
Loo. Arrah! can't you see, man, that this ugly ould gentleman is himself?
Bull. Hold your tongue, Mr. Looney Mactwolter! What's your name?
Lump. Why, I’se come here, zur — but as we be upon a bit o' business, I'll let you hear the long and short on't. (Drawing a chair and sitting down.) I’se comed here, zur,
to hire myself for your saryant.
Bull. Ah! but you don't cxpect, I perceive, to have any standing wages.
Loo. (Drawiny a chair and sitting down.) Are n't you a pretty spalpeen, now, to squat yourself down there in the presence of Mr. Deputy Bull ?
Bull. Now, here's a couple of scoundrels !
Loo. Don't be in a passion with him. Mind how I'll larn him politeness! Bull. Get
, you villain, or — Loo. Not before Mr. Lump. See how I'll give him the polish.
Bull. If you don't get up directly, I'll squeeze your heads together like two figs in a jar !
Lump. (Rising.) 0, then, it be unmanncrly for a footman to rest himsell, I suppose !
Loo. (Rising.) To be sure it is; no servant has the bad manners to sit before his master, but the coachman. Lump. I ax your pardon, zur ; I'se but a poor Yorkshire lad,
from Doncaster Races ; I'se simple, but I ’se willing to learn.
Bull. Simple and willing to learn ? Two qualities, Master Lump, which will answer my purpose. (LUMP stands back.)
Loo. Mind what you're after going to do, Mr. Deputy Bull ! If you hire this fellow from the Donkey Races, when Looney Mactwolter is at your elbow, I'll make free to say, you 're mak ing a complete Judy of yourself.
Bull. You do make free, with a vengeance! Now, I'll make free to say, get out of my house, you impudent cow-doctor !
Loo. You're no scholard, or you'd lárn how to bemean yourself to a physicianer. Arrah! Is n't a cow-doctor as good as you, you ould figman ?
Bull. Old figman! This rascal, tco, quizzing my origin! Get down stairs, or —
Loo. Don't come over me with the pride of your staircase, for had n't my father a comfortabls ladder to go up and down stairs with ? Take Mr. Lump into your diicy service, and next time I'm after meeting him, I'll thump Mr. Lump, or Mr. Lump shall thump Mr. Lruney Mactwolter !
(Exit, L. Exeunt Bull and LUMP, R.}
XXVI. - THE DUEL.*
Enter SIR LUCIUS O'TRIGGER, L., with pistols, followed by ACRES. Acres. (L.) By my valor, then, Sir Lucius, forty yards is a good distance.
Odds levels and aims!—I say it is a good disSir Lucius. (R.) Is it for muskets or small field-pieces? Upon my conscience, Mr. Acres, you must leave those things to me. Stay, now - I'll show you. (Measures paces along the floor.) There, now, that is a very pretty distance a pretty gentleman's distance.
Acr. (R.) Zounds! we might as well fight in a sentry-box! I tell you, Sir Lucius, the further he is off, the cooler I shall take
Sir L. (L.) Faith! then I suppose you would aim at him best of all if he was out of sight!
Acr. No, Sir Lucius; but I should think forty or eight-andthirty yards
Sir L. Pooh! pooh! nonsense! Three or four feet between the mouths of your pistols is as good as a mile.
Acr. Odds bullets, no! — by my valor! there is no merit in killing him so near! Do, my dear Sir Lucius, let me bring him down at a long shot:- a long shot, Sir Lucius, if you love me !
Sir L. Well, the gentleman's friend and I must settle that. But tell me now, Mr. Acres, in case of an accident, is there any little will or commission I could execute for you?
Acr. I am much obliged to you, Sir Lucius - but I don't understand
* Sco page 233.