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and that is the next way to give poor jades the bots : this house is turn'd upside down, since Robin ostler dy'd.
i Car. Poor fellow! never joy'd since the price of oats rose; it was the death of him.
2 Car. I think, this be the most villanous house in all London road for fleas; I am stung like a terch.
i Car. Like a tench? by the mass, there is ne'er a king in Christendom could be better bit than I have been since the first cock.—What, Ostler! come away, and be hang’d, come away.
2 Car. I have a gammon of bacon, and two razes of ginger, to be deliver'd as far as Charing Cross.
i Car. 'Odsbody! the turkeys in my pannier are quite starv'd.-What, Ostler ! -A plague on thee! hast thou never an eye in thy head ? canst not hear? An't were not as good a deed as drink, to break the pate of thee, I am a very villain.-Come, and be hang’d:-Hast no faith in thee?
Enter GADSHILL. Gads. Good morrow, Carriers. What's o'clock? 3 Car. I think, it be two o'clock. Gads. I pr’ythee, lend me thy lantern, to see my gelding in the stable.
i Car. Nay, soft, I pray ye; I know a trick worth two of that, i’faith. Gads. I pr’ythee, lend me thine.
2 Car, Ay, when ? canst tell ? - Lend me thy lantern, quoth’ai-marry, I'll see thee hang’d first.
Gads. Sirrah Carrier, what time do you mean to come to London?
2 Car. Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant thee.-Come, neighbour Mugges, we'll call up the gentlemen ; they'll along with company, for they have great charge.
The Road by Gads Hill.
Enter Henry Prince of Wales, and Poins,
disguised. Poins. Come, come, shelter ; I have removed Fal. staff's horse, and he frets like a gummed velvet. P. Hen. Stand closc. - [Poins retires a little.
Enter Falstaff, disguised.
P. Hen. Peace, ye fat-kidney'd rascal; what a brawling dost thou keep?
Fal. What, Poins ! Hal!
P. Hen. He has walked up to the top of the hill; I'll go seek him. [Pretends to go and look for Poins.
Fal. I am accursed to rob in that thief's company : the rascal hath removed my horse, and tied him I know not where. If I travel but four foot by the squire further afoot, I shall break my wind. Well, I doubt not but to die a fair death for all this, if I 'scape hanging for killing that rogue. I have forsworn his company hourly any time this two and twenty year, and yet I am bewitched with the rogue's company. If the rascal have not given me medicines to make me love him, I'll be hang'd; it could not be else; I have drunk medicines.-Poins !--Hal !-a plague upon you both!- Bardolph !- Peto ! I'll starve ere l’ll rob a foot further. An't were not as good a deed as drink, to turn true man, and to leave these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that ever chewed
with a tooth. Eight yards of uneven ground, is three score and ten miles afoot with me; and the stony-hearted villains know it well enough : a plague upon't, when thieves cannot be true to one another! [They whistle.] Whew!-A plague upon you all! Give me my horse, you rogues ; give me my horse, and be hang'd.
P. Hen. Peace, ye fat guts! lie down; lay thine ear close to the ground, and list if thou canst hear the tread of travellers.
Fal. Have you any levers to lift me up again, being down? 'Sblood, I'll not bear mine own flesh so far afoot again, for all the coin in thy father's exchequer. What a plague mean ye, to colt me tbus?
P. Hen. Thou liest, thou art not colted, thou art uncolted.
[He advances to FALSTAFF. Fal. I pr’ythee, good Prince Hal, help me to my horse ; good king's son. · P. Hen. Out, you rogue! shall I be your ostler?
Fal. Go, hang thyself in thy own heir-apparent garters! If I be ta’en, I'll peach for this. An I have not ballads made on you all, and sung to filthy tunes, let a cup of sack be my poison; when a jest is so forward, and afoot too !-I hate it..
Enter Poins, GADSHILL, BARDOLPH, and Pero,
disguised. Gads. Stand. Fal. So I do, against my will.
Poins. O, 'tis our setter; I know his voice. What news ?
Gads. Case ye, case ye; on with your visors ; there's money of the king's coming down the hill, 'tis going to the king's exchequer.
Fal. You lie, you rogue; 'tis going to the king's tavern.
Gads. There's enough to make us all.
P. Hen. Sirs, you four shall front them in the narrow lane; Ned Poins, and I, will walk lower: if they 'scape from your encounter, then they light on us.
Fal. But how many be there of them? .
Fal. Indeed, I am not John of Gaunt, your grandfather ; but yet no coward, Hal.
P. Hen. Well, we leave that to the proof.
Poins. Sirrah Jack, thy horse stands behind the hedge; when thou need'st him, there thou shalt find him. Farewell, and stand fast.
Fal. Now I cannot strike him, if I should be hang'di. :
P. Hen. Ned, where are our disguises ? I
[Aside. [Exeunt the PRINCE and Poins. Fal. Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I; every mar to his business. [They put on their Masks, and draw their Swords.
Enter Four Travellers. Trav. Come, neighbour; the boy shall lead our horses down the hill: we'll walk afoot a while, and case our legs.
Fal. fc. Stand.
[The TRAVELLERS run back again, followed by
BARDOLPH, GADSHILL, and Pero. Fal. Down with them; cut the villains' throats; ah! whoreson caterpillars! bacon-fed knaves! they hate us youth : down with them ; fleece them :young men must live: you are grand-jurors, are ye? We'll jure you, 'ifaith.
Enter Henry, Prince OF WALES, and Poins, in
Buckram Suits. P. Hen. The thieves have bound the true men: Now, could thou and I rob the thieves, and go merrily to London, it would be argument for a week, laughter for a month, and a good jest for ever. Poins. Stand close, I hear them coming.
[They retire a little Enter Falstaff, GADSHILL, BARDOLPH, and Peto,
with Bags of Money. Fal. Come, my masters, let us share, and then to horse before day. (They sit down on the Ground.] An the prince and Poins be not two arrant cowards, there's no equity stirring: there's no more valour in that Poins, than in a wild-duck.
P, Hen. Your money.
[As they are sharing, the PRINCE and Poins
set upon them. The Rest run away; and FALSTAFF, after a Blow or two, runs away
too, leaving the Booty behind him. P. Hen. Got with much ease. Now merrily to
The thieves are scatter'd, and possess'd with fear