CHAPTER XIV.

FOLJAMBE IS EXPELLED.-HIS BEHAVIOUR UPON IT. -A PRACTICAL DISSERTATION UPON PRIDE.

What is the cause, Laertes,

That thy rebellion looks so giant-like?

SHAKSPEARE.Hamlet.

On the

PETULANT as I dare say I have appeared in the course of these memoirs, I was not in the least affronted with my kinsman-tutor for the appellation he gave me at the end of the last chapter. contrary, he had not been gone ten minutes, before the musing I fell into, the consequence of his portentous story, made me very much inclined to think he was right.

This musing lasted during the greater part of the day; and I fell into as many resolutions as humours, -according as love for Bertha, indignation at her brother, prudence, or a spirit of independence, became uppermost. At one time I arrayed myself in stoicism, and would be a Cato; at another, I was all dignity and Clifford-pride towards the whole family of Foljambe Park. But this soon gave way before the sweet beauty and frankness of Bertha, who had never shewn pride to any one. In the end this pre

I could not part with my feelings, and

vailed;
would not if I could.

In the midst of this, a trifling question obtruded itself-Had Bertha any, and what feelings towards me? Strange to say, I had never very seriously asked this before, so richly did I deserve the epithet which my tutor had bestowed upon me, and so true his remark, that "this love fools us passing well."

Thinking I would settle the point, I took a walk by the side of the Charwell. Here, except that she had commended my dancing, said she should miss us all when we went away, and hoped she should see me again with Charles, I had not a breath to flatter myself with that I could be remembered, much less favoured. With that Charles, too, I had never been asked to return, and was now about to break for ever.

Nor did her high German as well as English descent fail to be thought of. Was ever fool, therefore, more deluded by his heart, when I yet felt myself clinging to this delicious passion, in the very moment that I was uttering to myself the most fervid resolves to banish it for ever?

But hope has well been called "the most powerful of all tempters," and, like the great tempter of old, it can sometimes assume the form of an angel of light, the better to deceive its votaries; and if a sailor who had sunk full twenty fathoms deep never lost his hope till he lost his senses, what wonder if I would not forego this sweet friend of man in a mild

and blissful evening, at the blissful age of nineteen, and on the bank of a blissful river.

"Tis true, my tongue breathing philosophy and resolution, all the time my heart was beating rebellion, reminded me of what I had heard of St. Austin, who, while preferring prayers to be strengthened against carnal pleasures, secretly hoped he should not be heard. But such is the wayward nature of man

-not, I fear, confined to his youth.

In the midst of this struggle, I was critically met by Fothergill, from whom I expected another scold, but it was lost in the news he had to tell. He had evidently something important to communicate.

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"Lad," said he, “I called you a hard name when I last left you but let that pass; for though I thought you what I wont repeat, you are at least not so mad and headstrong as your friend there,”—and he pointed to Christ Church.

"What has happened ?" asked I.

"Only expelled, for not submitting to be rusticated; that's all."

I felt my cheeks immediately suffused, and my heart to beat high; for I found I still loved Foljambe, though still resolving to separate. Fothergill went

on.

"This froward spark, who thinks himself above all the world (you may guess what he thinks of you), did not chuse to submit to the punishment awarded to him for disobedience of orders, so broke prison,

'And to his general sent a brave defiance.'"

"Do you mean," said I, "that he has executed. his threat, and has quitted his college for ever?"

"I cannot exactly say," answered Fothergill," that he has quitted his college, because his college has quitted him. For, before he could give his intended notice, though after he broke loose, he found himself expelled, propter contumaciam. In fact, having, as I said, left his prison without leave, his chief called for the book of battels, and struck him out of it with his own hand."

"Lamentable!" cried I.

say ?"

“What will his family

“That he has been rightly served,” observed Fothergill.

"And how does he bear it ?"

"Like all disgraced men of noble spirit; of course, triumphs. He has already made a great party, who canvass the measure with no good-will to the highminded chief who has thus asserted himself, and whom they blame for tyrannizing for tyranny's sake, as Mr. Hastings was intending to leave college altogether. He so represented it to the dean, in a letter, who returned it with this note on the passage in the margin: In your situation, you could not have been allowed to quit, till you had submitted to the punishment awarded and deserved.'

"And what is thought of it?"

"The town is split, of course. By one party, the deed is deemed a detestable act of power; by the other, a firm measure of justice. May I ask your opinion?"

"I am too grieved to give a free one,” said I; "for I still love my schoolfellow."

"Love him, if you please," said Fothergill; "but let not that blind you to his egotism, his insolence, or his pride. It is not, nor it cannot come to good.Hunc tu Romane caveto."

Here, being joined by two or three fellows of Queen's, Mr. Fothergill left me to pursue my meditations on the banks of the Cherwell; and meditate I did, bitterly and deeply. For, with all my wrongs, I was anxious for Foljambe's fate; though that, considering his position in the world, an only son, and great heir of a great family, and so commanding every where but at Oxford, left me in a little time without much anxiety on his account.

But when I thought of the proof this gave, in one so young, of a proud, overbearing, aristocratic, and haughty spirit, the total incompatibility of a friendship between him and me, except in the character of patron and follower, which our former equality forbade, struck me in unanswerable force. I found my sagacious tutor more and more right.

I gave the whole night to these reflections. It was the first great disappointment I had endured; but my spirit of independence coming to my aid, I resolved to bear it like a man; and as Hastings left the university the very next day, I had more leisure and opportunity to recover. Here his absence, indeed, was of service, not merely by taking from my vision the person who so constantly and anxiously filled but in bringing to