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he is sure to find some who are; so that if clubs with an eye of contempt, and talks he be disposed to take a whet, a nooning, even of the Kit-Cat and October as of a an evening's draught, or a bottle after couple of upstarts. Their ordinary dismidnight, he goes to the club, and finds a course, (as much as I have been able to knot of friends to his mind.
learn of it) turns altogether upon such adIt is a maxim in this club, that the stew-ventures as have passed in their own asard never dies; for as they succeed one an- sembly; of members who have taken the other by way of rotation, no man is to quit glass in their turns for a week together, the great elbow-chair which stands at the without stirring out of the club; of others upper-end of the table, till his successor is who have smoked an hundred pipes at a in readiness to fill it: insomuch that there sitting; of others, who have not missed has not been a sede vacante in the memory their morning's draught for twenty years of man.
together. Sometimes they speak in rapThis club was instituted towards the end tures of a run of ale in king Charles's reign; (or as some of them say, about the middle) and sometimes reflect with astonishment of the civil wars, and continued without upon games at whist, which have been miinterruption till the time of the great fire, * raculously recovered by members of the which burnt them out, and dispersed them society, when in all human probability the for several weeks. The steward at that case was desperate. time maintained his post till he had like to They delight in several old catches,
have been blown up with a neighbouring which they sing at all hours, to encourage • house, (which was demolished in order to one another to moisten their clay, and
stop the fire;) and would not leave the grow immortal by drinking; with many
Virg. Æn. i. 328. general club nemine contradicente.
O goddess! for no less you seem.
It is very strange to consider, that a institution and continuation of the Ever-creature like man, who is sensible of so lasting, Club, I should here endeavour to many weaknesses and imperfections, should say something of the manners and charac- be actuated by a love of fame: that vice ters of its several members, which I shall and ignorance, imperfection and misery, do according to the best lights I have re- should contend for praise, and endeavour ceived in this matter.
as much as possible to make themselves It appears by their books in general, objects of admiration. that since their first institution, they have But notwithstanding man's essential persmoked fifty tons of tobacco, drank thirty fection is but very little, his comparative thousand butts of ale, one thousand hogs- perfection may be very considerable. If he heads of red port, two hundred barrels of looks upon himself in an abstracted light, brandy, and a kilderkin of small beer. he has not much to boast of; but if he conThere has been likewise a great consump-siders himself with regard to others, he tion of cards. It is also said, that they ob- may find occasion of glorying, if not in lu serve the law in Ben Jonson's club,f which I own virtues, at least in the absence of anorders the fire to be always kept in (focus other's imperfections. This gives a difperennis esto) as well for the convenience ferent turn to the reflections of the wise of lighting their pipes, as to cure the damp- man and the fool. The first endeavcurs to ness of the club-room. They have an old shine in himself, and the last to outshine woman in the nature of a vestal, whose others. The first is humbled by the sense business it is to cherish and perpetuate the of his own infirmities, the last is lifted up
fire, which burns from generation to gene- by the discovery of those which he observes ? ration, and has seen the glass-house fires in in other men. The wise man considers and out above an hundred times.
what he wants, and the fool what he The Everlasting Club treats all other abounds in. The wise man is happy when
he gains his own approbation, and the fool See the Leges Convivales of this club, in Lang. when he recommends himself to the aphaine's Lives of English Poets & Ash Bon Jonson. plause of those about him.
O Dea certe!
* Anno 1666.
But however unreasonable and absurd | smiles make men happy; their frowns drive this passion for admiration may appear in them to despair. I shall only add under such a creature as man, it is not wholly to this head, that Ovid's book of the Art of be discouraged; since it cften produces very Love is a kind of heathen ritual, which good effects, not only as it restrains him contains all the forms of worship which are from doing any thing which is mean and made use of to an idol. contemptible, but as it pushes him to ac It would be as difficult a task to reckon tions which are great and glorious. The up these different kinds of idols, as Milton's principle may be defective or faulty, but was to number those that were known in the consequences it produces are so good, Canaan, and the lands adjoining. Most of that for the benefit of mankind, it ought not them are worshipped like Moloch in fires to be extinguished.
and flames. Some of them, like Baal, love It is observed by Cicero, that men of the to see their votaries cut and slashed, and greatest and the most shining parts are the shedding their blood for them. Some of most actuated by ambition; and if we look them, like the idol in the Apocrypha, must 'into the two sexes, I believe we shall find have treats and collations prepared for this principle of action stronger in women them every night. It has indeed been than in men.
known, that some of them have been used The passion for praise, which is so very by their incensed worshippers like the Chivehement in the fair sex, produces excel- nese idols, who are whipped and scourged lent effects in women of sense, who desire when they refuse to comply with the prayto be admired for that only which deserves ers that are offered to them. admiration; and I think we may observe, I must here observe that those idolaters without a compliment to them, that many who devote themselves to the idols I am of them do not only live in a more uniform here speaking of, differ very much from all course of virtue, but with an infinitely other kinds of idolaters. For as others fall greater regard to their honour, than what out because they worship different idols, we find in the generality of our own sex. these idolaters quarrel because they worHow many instances have we of chastity, ship the same. fidelity, devotion! How many ladies distin The intention therefore of the idol is quite
guish themselves by the education of their contrary to the wishes of the idolater: as • children, care of their families, and love of the one desires to confine the idol to him
their husbands, which are the great quali- self, the whole business and ambition of the ties and achievements of womankind! as other is to multiply adorers. This humour the making of war, the carrying on of traffic, of an idol is prettily described in a tale of the administration of justice, are those by Chaucer. He represents one of them sitting which men grow famous, and get them at a table with three of her votaries about selves a name.
her, who are all of them courting her fa-, But as this passion for admiration, when vour, and paying their adorations. She it works according to reason, improves the smiled upon one, drank to another, and trod beautiful part of our species in every thing upon the other's foot which was under the that is laudable; so nothing is more destruc- table. Now which of these three, says the tive to them when it is governed by vanity old bard, do you think was the favourite? and folly. What I have therefore here to In troth, says he, not one of all the three. say, only regards the vain part of the sex, The behaviour of this old idol in Chaucer, whom for certain reasons, which the reader puts me in mind of the beautiful Clarinda, will hereafter see at large, I shall distin- one of the greatest idols among the moderns guish by the name of idols. An idol is She is worshipped once a week by candlewholly taken up in the adorning of her per-| light, in the midst of a large congregation, son. You see in every posture of her body, generally called an assembly. Some of the air of her face, and motion of her head, gayest youths in the nation endeavour to that it is her business and employment to plant themselves in her eye, while she sits gain adorers. For this reason your idols in form with multitudes of tapers burning appear in all public places and assemblies, about her. To encourage the zeal of her in order to seduce men to their worship idolaters, she bestows a mark of her favour The playhouse is very frequently filled upon every one of them, before they go out with idols; several of them are carried in of her presence. She asks a question of one, procession every evening about the ring, tells a story to another, glances an ogle and several of them set up their worship upon a third, takes a pinch of snuff from even in churches. They are to be accosted the fourth, lets her fan drop by accident to in the language proper to the deity. Life give the fifth an occasion of taking it up. and death are in their power: joys of hea- In short, every one goes away satisfied with ven and pains of hell, are at their disposal; his success, and encouraged to renew his paradise is in their arms, and eternity in devotions on the same canonical hour that every moment that you are present with day seven-night. them. Raptures, transports, and ecstacies An idol may be undeified by many acciare the rewards which they confer; sighs dental causes. Marriage in particular is a and tears, prayers and broken hearts, are kind of counter-apotheosis, or a deification the offerings which are paid to them. Their inverted. When a man becomes familiar
· with his goddess, she quickly sinks into a will see in several of the following quotawoman.
tions. Old age is likewise a great decayer of What can be greater than either the your idol. The truth of it is, there is not a thought or the expression in that stanza, • more unhappy being than a superannuated To drive the deer with hound and horn
idol, especially when she has contracted Earl Percy took his way;
The child may rue that is unborn
The hunting of that day! when her worshippers are about her.
Considering therefore that in these and This way of considering the misfortunes many other cases the woman generally out- which this battle would bring upon poslives the idol, I must return to the moral of terity, not only on those who were born imthis paper, and desire my fair readers to mediately after the battle, and lost their give a proper direction to their passion for fathers in it, but on those also who perished being admired; in order to which, they in future battles which took their rise from must endeavour to make themselves the this quarrel of the two earls, is wonderfully objects of a reasonable and lasting admira- beautiful, and conformable to the way of tion. This is not to be hoped for from thinking among the ancient poets. beauty, or dress, or fashion, but from those
Audiet pugnas vitio parentum inward ornaments which are not to be de
Rara juventus. Hor. Lib. 1. Od. ii. 23. faced by time or sickness, and which ap Posterity, thinn'd by their fathers' crimes, pear most amiable to those who are most Shall read, with grief, the story of their times. acquainted with them.
C. What can be more sounding and poetical,
or resemble more the majestic simplicity of
the ancients, than the following stanzas? No. 74.] Friday, May 25, 1711.
The stout Earl of Northumberland
A vow to God did make,
His pleasure in the Scottish woods
Three summers' days to take.
With fifteen hundred bowmen bold,
All chosen men of might,
Who knew full well, in time of need
To aim their shafts aright.
"The hounds ran swiftly through the woods
The nimble deer to take,
-Vocat ingenti clamore Cithæron,
Georg. iii. 43. reason I shall quote several passages of it,
Cithæron loudly calls me to my way;
Thy hounds, Taygetus, open, and pursue the prey: in which the thought is altogether the same High Epidaurus urges on my speed, with what we meet in several passages of
Fam'd for his hills, and for his horses' breed: the Æneid; not that I would infer from
From hills and dales the cheerful cries rebound;
For Echo hunts along and propagates the sound. thence that the poet (whoever he was)
Dryden. proposed to himself any imitation of those
'Lo yonder doth Earl Douglas come,
His men in armour bright;
* All men of pleasant Tividale,
Adversi campo apparent, hastasque reductis however beg leave to dissent from so great Protendunt longe dextris; et spicula vibrant:an authority as that of Sir Philip Sidney, in
Quique altum Præneste viri, quique arva Gabine the judgment which he has passed as to the
Junonis, gelidumque Anienem, et roscida rivis
Hernica saxa colunt:qui rosea rura Velini, rude style and evil apparel of this anti Qui Tetricæ horrentes rupes, montemque Severum, quated song; for there are several parts in Casperiamque colunt, Forulosque, et flumen Himellä: it where not only the thought but the lan
Qui Tiberim Fabarimque bibunt.
n. xi. 605-vii. 682, 712 guage is majestic, and the
numbers sonorous; at least the apparel is much more
Advancing in a line, they couch their spears
-Preneste sends a chosen band, gorgeous than many of the poets made use
With those who plow Saturnia's Gabine land: of in Queen Elizabeth's time, as the reader Besides the succours which cold Anien yields;
The rocks of Hernicus besides a band,
son I do not mention this part of the poem That followed from Velinum's dewy land
but to show the natural cast of thought
which appears in it, as the two last verses
-Cadit et Ripheus, justissimus unus
Qui fuit in Teucris, et servantissimus aqui.
En. ii. 426.
Then Ripheus fell in the unequal fight, * Earl Douglas on a milk white steed,
Just of his word, observant of the right;
Heav'n thought not so.
In the catalogue of the English who fell,
Witherington's behaviour is in the same Turnus ut antevolans tardum præcesserat agmen,
&c. Vidisti, quo Turnus equo, quibus ibat in armis manner particularized very artfully, as the Aureus
reader is prepared for it by that account "Our English archers bent their bows,
which is given of him in the beginning of Their hearts were good and true;
the battle; though I am satisfied your little At the first flight of arrows sent,
buffoon readers (who have seen that pasFull threescore Scots they slew. “They clos'd full fast on ev'ry side,
sage ridiculed in Hudibras) will not be able No slackness there was found;
to take the beauty of it: for which reason I And many a gallant gentleman
dare not so much as quote it. * Lay gasping on the ground.
• Then stept a gallant 'squire forth, With that there came an arrow keen
Witherington was his name, Out of an English bow,
Who said, I would not have it told Which struck Earl Douglas to the heart,
To Henry our king for shame, deep and deadly blow.'
*That e'er my captain fought on foot, Æneas was wounded after the same manner And I stood looking on." by an unknown hand in the midst of a par- We meet with the same heroic sentiment ley.
in Virgil. Has inter voces, media inter talia verba, Ecce viro stridens alis allapsa sagitta est,
Non pudet, O Rutuli, cunctis pro talibus unam
Objectare animam ? numerone, an viribus æqui
En. xii. 229.
For shame, Rutilius, can you bear the sight
Of one expos'd for all, in single fight,
Can we before the face of Heav'n confess Or hostile god, is left unknown by fame. Dryden.
Our courage colder, or our numbers less ? Dryden. But of all the descriptive parts of this song, What can be more natural, or more movthere are none more beautiful than the
four ing, than the circumstances in which he following stanzas, which have a great force describes the behaviour of those women and spirit in them, and are filled with very who had lost their husbands on this fatal natural circumstances. The thought in the day? third stanza was never touched by any other
• Next day did many widows come poet, and is such a one as would have shined Their husbands to bewail; in Homer or Virgil:
They wash'd their wounds in brinish tears,
But all would not prevail.
* Their bodies bath'd in purple blood, An English archer then perceiv'd
They bore with them away;
They kiss'd them dead a thousand times,
When they were clad in clay.' 'He had a bow bent in his hand, Made of a trusty tree,
Thus we see how the thoughts of this An arrow of a cloth-yard long
poem, which naturally arise from the subUnto the head drew he.
ject, are always simple, and sometimes ex'Against Sir Hugh Montgomery So right his shaft he set,
quisitely noble; that the language is often The grey.goose wing that was thereon
very sounding, and that the whole is writIn his heart-blood was wet.
ten with a true poetical spirit. "This fight did last from break of day
If this song had been written in the
Gothic manner, which is the delight of all
our little wits, whether writers or readers, One may observe, likewise, that in the ca
it would not have hit the taste of so many talogue of the slain, the author has followed ages, and have pleased the readers of all the example of the great ancient poets, not
ranks and conditions. I shall only beg paronly in giving a long list of the dead, but don for such a profusion of Latin quotaby diversifying it with little characters of tions; which I should not have made use particular persons.
of, but that I feared my own judgment
would have looked too singular on such a "And with Earl Douglas there was slain Sir Hugh Montgomery,
subject, had not I supported it by the pracBir Charles Carrel, that from the field
tice and authority of Virgil.
* There is nothing ludicrous in the verse alluded to, Sir David Lamb, so well esteem'd,
as it stands in the original ballad: Yet saved could not be.'
"For Wetharryngton my harte is wo, The familiar sound in these names destroys
That ever he slayne shulde be;
For when both his legges wear hewyne in to, the majesty of the description; for this rea Yet he knul'd and fought on his kne."
No. 75.] Saturday, May 26, 1711. vail, as the standards of behaviour, in the
country wherein he lives. What is oppoOmnis Aristippum decuit color, et status, et res.
site to the eternal rules of reason and good Hor. Lib. 1. Ep. 23. xvii. All fortune fitted Aristippus well.-Creech.
sense, must be excluded from any place in It was with some mortification that I
the carriage of a well-bred man. "I did not, suffered the raillery of a fine lady of my subject, when I called Dorimant a clown,
I confess, explain myself enough on this acqaintance, for calling, in one of my pa- and made it an instance of it, that he called pers, * Dorimant
clown. She was so un- the orange-wench, Double Tripe: I should merciful as to take advantage of my in- have shown, that humanity obliges a genvincible taciturnity, and on that occasion with great freedom to consider the air, the tleman to give no part of humankind reheight, the face, the gesture of him, who proach, for what they, whom they recould pretend to judge so arrogantly of gal- proach, may possibly have in common with lantry. She is full of motion, janty, and When a gentleman speaks coarsely, he has
the most virtuous and worthy amongst us. lively in her impertinence, and one of those dressed himself clean to no purpose. The that commonly pass, among the ignorant, clothing of our minds certainly ought to be for persons who have a great deal of hu
She had the play of Sir Fopling in regarded before that of our bodies. To beher hand, and after she had said it was tray in a man's talk a corrupt imagination, happy for her there was not so charming a
is a much greater offence against the concreature as Dorimant now living, she began
versation of a gentleman, than any negliwith a theatrical air and tone of voice to gence of dress imaginable. But this sense read, by way of triumph over me, some of of the matter is so far from being received his speeches . "'Tis she! that lovely air; fer passes for a fine gentleman. He is loud,
among people even of condition, that Vocithose melting charms about her mouth, haughty, gentle, soft, lewd, and obsequious which Medley spoke of. I'll follow the by turns, just as a little understanding and lottery, and put in for a prize with my sent moment. He passes among the silly
great impudence prompt him at the prefriend Bellair.
part of our women for a man of wit, be"In love the victors from the vanquish'd fly; They tly that wound, and they pursue that die.'
cause he is generally in doubt. . He contra
dicts with a shrug, and confutes with a Then turning over the leaves, she reads certain sufficiency, in professing such and alternately, and speaks,
such a thing is above his capacity. What * And you and Loveit to her cost shall find makes his character the pleasanter is, that I fathom all the depths of woman-kind.'
he is a professed deluder of women; and Oh the fine gentleman! But here, continues because the empty coxcomb has no regard she, is the passage I admire most, where to any thing that is of itself sacred and inhe begins to tease Loveit, and mimic Sir violable. I have heard an unmarried lady Fopling. Oh, the pretty satire, in his re- of fortune say, It is a pity so fine a gentlesolving to be a coxcomb to please, since man as Vocifer is so great an atheist. The noise and nonsense have such powerful crowds of such inconsiderable creatures, charms.
that infest all places of assembling, every * I, that I may successful prove,
reader will have in his eye from his own Transform myself to what you love.'
observation; but would it not be worth Then how like a man of the town, so wild considering what sort of figure a man and gay is that!
who formed himself upon those principles The wise will find a diff'rence in our fate,
among us, which are agreeable to the dicYou wed a woman, I a good estate.'
tates of honour and religion, would make It would have been a very wild endeavour life?
in the familiar and ordinary occurrences of for a man of my temper to offer any opposition to so nimble a speaker as my fair several duties of life better than Ignotus.
I hardly have observed any one fill his enemy is; but her discourse gave me very All the under parts of his behaviour, and many reflections, when I had left her com- such as are exposed to common observapany. Among others, I could not but con- tion, have their rise in him from great and sider with some attention, the false impres- noble motives. A firm and unshaken exsions the generality (the fair sex more pectation of another life makes him become
especially) have of what should be in; this; humanity and good-nature, fortified - tended, when they say 'a fine gentleman;' by the sense of virtue, has the same effect
and could not help revolving that subject upon him as the neglect of all goodness has in my thoughts, and settling, as it were, an upon many others. Being firmly established idea of that character in my own imagina- in all matters of importance, that certain tion.
inattention which makes men's actions look No man ought to have the esteem of the rest of the world, for any actions which are by a thorough contempt of little excel
easy, appears in him with greater beauty: disagreeable to those maxims which pre-lencies, he is perfectly master of them.
This temper of mind leaves him under no * Spect. No. 65.
necessity of studying his air, and he has this