IN the cathedral at Saragossa is the tomb of a famous inquisitor; six pillars surround this tomb; to each is chained a Moor, as preparatory to his being burnt. On this St Foix ingeniously observes, if ever the Jack Ketch of any country should be rich enough to have a splendid tomb, this might serve as an excellent model.

Curiosities of Literature, v. 1, p. 281.

THE following is a literal copy of a card lately sent to the Grand Allies office in this town:

"I Willy Woff wishes te naw whe has te de wi the houses at Tantovy, for Jack Steinson leives abuin me and he lifts up the bords every morning wi a pore, and lets his bugs fa down amang ma crowdy."

"Grand alize Offies Newcastle."

THE following petition, written by lord Chesterfield, is perhaps the most severe satire that ever was couched in respectful terms, and is recommended as a pattern to the patriots, in all their remonstrances and petitions, to observe the graces.

To the KING'S most excellent Majesty. The humble petition of Philip, earl of Chesterfield, knight of the most noble order of the gar

ter,

Sheweth,

That your petitioner, being rendered, by deafness, as useless and insignificant as most of his equals and cotemporaries are by nature, hopes, in common with them, to share your majesty's royal favour and bounty; whereby he may be enabled

either to save or to spend, as he shall think proper, more than he can do at present.

That your petitioner, having had the honour of serving your majesty in several very lucrative employments, seems thereby entitled to a lucrative retreat from business, and to enjoy otium cum dignitate; that is, leisure, and a large pension.

Your petitioner humbly presumes that he has, at least, a common claim to such a pension. He has a vote in the most august assembly in the world; he has an estate that puts him above wanting it; but he has, at the same time, (though he says it) an elevation of sentiment, that makes him not only desire, but (pardon, dread sir, you are used to) insist upon it.

That your petitioner is little apt, and always unwilling, to speak advantageously of himself; but, as, after all, some justice is due to one's self, as well as to others, he begs leave to represent, That his loyalty to your majesty has always been unshaken, even in the worst of times; that, particularly, in the late unnatural rebellion, when the pretender ad. vanced as far as Derby, at the head of at least 3000 undisciplined men, the flower of the Scottish nobility and gentry, your petitioner did not join him, as unquestionably he might have done, had he been so inclined; but, on the contrary, raised sixteen companies, of one hundred men each, at the public expence, in support of your majesty's undoubted right to the imperial crown of these realms; which distinguished proof of his loyalty is, to this hour, unrewarded.

Your majesty's petitioner is well aware, that your

civil list must necessarily be in a low and languid state, after the various frequent and profuse evacuations which it has of late years undergone; but, at the same time, he presumes to hope, that this argu ment, which seems not to have been made use of against any other person whatsoever, shall not, in this single case, be urged against him; and the less so, as he has good reasons to believe, that the deficiencies of the pension fund are by no means the last that will be made good by parliament.

Your petitioner begs leave to observe, that a small pension is disgraceful and opprobrious; as it intimates a shameful necessity on one part, and a degrading sort of charity on the other; but that a great one implies dignity and affluence on one side, on the other, regard and esteem; which, doubtless, your majesty must entertain in the highest degree for those great personages whose respectable names stand upon your eleemosynary list. Your petitioner, therefore, humbly persuades himself, upon this principle, that less than 3000l. a year will not be proposed to him; if made up gold, the more agreeable; if for life, the more marketable.

Your petitioner persuades himself, that your majesty will not suspect this his humble application to proceed from any mean, interested motive, of which he has always had the utmost abhorrence. No, sir, he confesses his own weakness. Honour alone is his object. Honour is dearer to him than life. To honour he has always sacrificed all other considerations; and, upon this generous principle singly, he now solicits that honour, which, in the most shining times, distinguished the greatest men in

Greece, who were fed at the expence of the public. Upon this honour, so sacred to him as a peer, so tender to him as a man, he most solemnly assures your majesty, that, in case you shall be pleased to grant him this his humble request, he will gratefully and honourably support and promote, with zeal and vigour, the worst measure that the worst minister can ever suggest to your majesty; but, on the other hand, should he be singled out, marked, and branded by a refusal, he thinks himself obliged in honour to declare, that he will, to the utmost of his power, oppose the wisest and best measures that your majesty yourself can ever dicAnd your majesty's petitioner, &c. Gentleman's Magazine, Sept. 1775.

tate.

A very worthy gentlewoman, who, like many of her sex, thought no great harm in a good bargain from a smuggler, remarked to a few of her friends one evening after supper, that her gin cost only 8s. 6d. a gallon. One of the guests professing that stern sort of never deviating sanctity, commonly called Methodism, took the opportunity of sermonizing on the subject, and concluded by saying, the lady had, beyond all doubt, been tempted by the devil. Mr W. who is an equal connoisseur both in gin and joke, replied, though I cannot believe, sir, that our good hostess has been under influence of the devil, yet I really do think she has been tempted by some bad spirit. M. S.

A Yorkshire baronet extremely fond of trinkets, was diverting the tedium of a Sunday evening, by

admiring in the glass a very beautiful broach, which radiated with uncommon brilliancy from his shirt bosom: Miss S, who often rallied her friend on his foible, attacked him in the fact, and he, to avoid a direct answer himself, referred to a third person, whether there were not many worse modes of consuming the afternoon of the Sabbath day, especially after having been twice at church. Indeed, sir, replied the referrée, I've ever understood there were few better ways for a man to spend the Sunday evening, than by looking into his own breast.

M. S.

A good wife should be like three things, which three things she should not be like.

She should be like a town's clock, keep time and regularity; she should not be like a town's clock, speak so loud, that all the town may hear.

She should be like an echo, speak when she is spoken to; she should not be like an echo, always to have the last word.

She should be like a snail, keep within her own house; she should not be like a snail, carry all she has upon her back.

FRUIT seems to have been very scarce in the time of Henry VII. It appears that apples were paid for at a high rate, not less than one or two shillings a piece; that "a red rose," cost two shillings, and that a man and woman had eight shillings and fourpence for strawberries. At the same time the gay arts were not neglected: as for example:

Tt