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which gave a certain cynical anima. But always bear in mind, my lads, that tion to his manner, altogether over- this great indulgence I will only allow whelming and unpleasing. While Ed. to good steady men in harbour; for no ward was coolly revolving in his mind person whatever shall escape the most the apparent accuracy of the reported rigorous punishment I can think of at character of his commander, to the li- sea. ving figure before him, the clerk of “ Now, my lads, although I know the cheque came on board, and the that it is not common for officers like boatswain immediately piped All hands me, commanding his Majesty's vessels to muster, hoy!
of war, to condescend to explain to their No sooner was the clerk gone, than crew their motives for either this or the Captain, ordering all hands aft the that punishment, I will yet be so homainmast, took his station at the cap- nest with you as to tell you, that I stan, and began the following speech: -- have very weighty reasons for punish“ It has pleased the Lords Commis- ing both these crimes severely. We sioners of the Admiralty, my lads, to sail to-morrow, please God, for the bestow the command of this hooker on North Sea station ; and when you me; and as we are to be together in know that it is one which requires the future, I hope we shall agree well, and utmost steadiness, good conduct, and be good friends. I must, however, say, sobriety, both from the variableness of that I am determined to have nothing the climate, and the intricacy of its from you but strict, steady, good dis- occasional navigation, I am certain you cipline. I hold in my hands the Arti- cannot fail of perceiving my reasons cles of War, which are to be, in future, for the punishment of drunkenness; the rules of every man's conduct ; and since it principally proceeds on a deit shall be my fault if they are not termination I have long ago formed, strictly enforced ; but as most of you that every man, while God grants him already know them, I shall refrain health, shall always keep himself in a from reading them at this time, cer- state fit for duty, and not trundle his tain as I am, that those among you labour on the shoulders of some other who have never heard them, will, very poor fellow, who has no manner of bulikely, think they hear them soon siness with it; while he, forsooth, is enough. Two things, however, I must either pigging it below, under his mention ; for, by the sacred Power mess-table, or else scampering the that made me, I am determined to en- decks like a fool and a madman, creforce them with the utmost strictness, ating confusion, disorder, and mutiny and to punish all aggressors without wherever he comes. Again, when you mercy. The first of these things is, I recollect how very short most of you never will forgive a thief; and the se- are in the necessary rigging for a North cond, I never will forgive a drunkard. Sea winter, you certainly can neither Now, pay attention, my lads; I say I think me harsh nor cruel, in severely never will forgive e'er a one of you who punishing the scoundrel who would turns out to be either a thief or a deprive e'er a one of you of the most drunkard. No-so help me God, I trifling article of wearing apparel. I will punish a thief in the severest man- would ill perform my own duty were ner wherever I catch him ; ay, though I to do otherwise ; and it's a long look I should leave my cott, and burn an forward before pay-day appears. inch of candle at it. Regarding drunk- “ You now know my mind, my enness, my lads, I will take another lads, on the two principal points I ever way. You all know it to be a low, lub- mean to quarrel with you on. I am berly, beastly crime, to which, God going on shore to take leave of my knows, we are all liable enough at friends; and as some of your old times ; I mean, therefore, to make messmates may wish to see you before this one exception to its universal pu- we go, I mean you all to be as merry nishment. If it is committed by any as myself; and I shall accordingly one of you, while we are in harbour, leave orders for you to receive a double I pledge you my honour, I will be at allowance of grog to-day, with which some pains in considering the offend- you may drink bis Majesty's health, er's general character; and, as he per- and a good cruize to us—if you have forms his duty at sea, so shall he have any left after that is done, you may every reasonable allowance given him. add my health, and the rest of your officers. Good bye t'ye-be merry, devil else could he mean, I should like but be wise. Boatswain's mate, pipe for to know, by beastly but lousy? down."
O ho! my smart fellows, don't you be The whistles were instantly blown, after picking me up before I fall; nor and the ship's company dispersed in don't you go for to think that I've for. high spirits.
got what my old messmate, honest * Side, boys," bawled the quarter. Dan Colfin of the Majestic, used to master- attend the side.” The Cap- say.-Ay, he was the lad for my mo. tain, after some further private con- ney, either fore or aft, thof he was a versation with his first Lieutenant, at Scotchman !-and I'm sure he was a last made his farewell salute to all his great scholard, for I've heard all our officers; and again did the boatswain's officers say as much. Well, says Dan, pipe sound its long lengthened note -Barnes, says he, whenever a fellow as his gig shoved off.
calls you beast, or beastie-I think All was now impatience for the com- 'twas some such rigmarole phrase he mencement of the revels, and every used, you may depend on't he means minute was fifty ere the dinner was that you are lousy, says he ;-so up piped. At length came the happy fist directly, says he, and knock the hour ; and at eating and drinking, lubber down." with no duty to trouble him, who is “ Vy, I doesn't know but what you so happy as Jack, either ashore or on may be right, Barnes, a'ter all; that board? It is no easy matter, indeed to there Scotch differing so much from convey to our readers even the smallest our good English, you knows.—But I idea of a man-of-war's 'tween-deck, say, maties, what if our old Gibby with all hands at dinner; for the long there should get himself malty of an loud jolly laugh, the merry catch and a'ternoon, as usual, when we're at cheering chorus-theshrill lively whis- sea ?--My eye! what a cod's squint tle, the ill-humoured boisterous squab- he'd turn up when the skipper would ble, and the growling deep-toned im- say to him, You are a low, lubberly, precation-all strike the astonished ear lousy swab, Gibby! Serjeant of maat the same moment with such a stun, rines, put that drunken beast in irons ! ning noise, that one would think, (Imitates.) Saul! ye may do sae, your “ Hell was broke loose,
honour; but de'il a bone o' me's fu'. And all the devils were there."
Silence, you old sinner! you are con
tinually drunk, Gibby!- Boatswain'sAs, however, the subject is not unapt mate, give him a d-d good starting! to a season of jollity and merriment You are worse than a pig, Gibby! like the present, and as we find it alto- give the scoundrel five dozen at least ! gether impossible to identify either the I wouldn't give five skips of a louse for speakers or choristers, where all are all you ever do, Gibby! dan him, speaking and singing at once, we have send him through the fleet !” Here the only humbly to propose that any of our humble disciple of Matthews could readers, whether lady or gentleman, no longer hold out against the resist. whose curiosity may be so far excited, less vigour of his own wit, but readily are exceedingly welcome to take hold joined his messmates, who were conof our arm while we slowly take a vulsed with laughter. walk round the crowded deck, and “ I'se tell ye fat it is, Maister Lilnote down the living conversation as it lyeuk, or fat e'er's your name, if thou strikes the ear.
disna clap a stopper on that vile pota“I say, Jack, what d'ye think of ta-trap o' yours, d-n me but I'se gie the skipper's speech ? How d'ye relish ye a clank ower the canopy sall mak yon whiinsy whamsy of his 'bout drunk your day-lights sparkle again, and syne at sea, and drunk in harbour, eh? we'll see how you'll like that, my lad.
“ Think! den me if I know what Fa the deyvel d'ye think's gaun to to think on't. Mayhap, taking a small stand your jaw, ye snuffle o' a creadrop of grog, when one can touch it, ture? Confound ye ! ye're just a very may be both lubberly and lousy " good sample o' a'the rest o' ye're d-d
“Lousy! why, Jack, he did'nt say Cockney dirt-aye yattering and yelplousy, man-he said beastly.”
ing whan ye're eating, or whan ye've “Ay, that he did, Jack,- for Nat your nose close to the bread-bag ! and I were close under his lee." But bide ye a bit, my man-we're
“ Well, well, matics, and what the gaun to a place where I'll maybe live
to see a hantle o' that cleck o' yours way. Blast your day-lights, you lubta'en out o' ye."
ber! if you make me spill this here “By my soul, you are right, Gibby, grog, but I'll dance your rascally ribs and Hollyoak's wrong. I believe we into powder." shall see your calf country, my old “Hollo ! you sodger, mind your boy, very soon.—I say, Mack, what well blacked pins, my boy, and don't d'ye think's the largest tree in Gibby's capsize the good stuff. country ?'
“Number five !-Number five ! « o, how should I know. But what call number five below there !– Here, country d'ye call Gibby's ?"
my old mate, lay hold of the grog“ Why, Shetland, to be sure.” kid ; the hatchway's so completely
“0! Shetland, is it-there I have choak-a-block with lobster-backs and you, matey, for many's the good glass barber's clerks, there's no getting down of grog I've had in Shetland. The big- but by the cable. gest tree that I know that grows in “ Come, come, heave a-head, old Shetland is, let me see, a large, tall, skulk-me-ever, and let me pass; our bushy, full-grown-cabbage ! almost mess is on fire, and here is the water." as high, by the hokey! as our grog- “ Weel, sirs, and fat d'ye think o' kid there, ha, ha, ha!”
your fine Cockney now ;-ha, ha, ha! “Avast, avast there, Mack;-Pshaw! if I can keep frae laughing at it. D-n you should'nt be so d-d witty on me, if the poor singit mumping cat Gibby's country, my lad, seeing you hasna lost his call; and now ye'll hae don't know how much you may be obliged to wait till a' the sodgers are beholden to it yet before you hop the saired before ye. Saul! the brat was twig. For my part, I'll only say that for starting me, sending me through the man that speaks glummishly of the fleet, and fiend kens a' fat ; but, Gibby's country knows very little of in guid faith, if ye're a' o'my mind, the North Sea - I'm certain they don't the devil a spoonfae o' grog should wet meh, Gibby? But never mind, my his wuzen.” old soul ; we'll very likely soon be in “For shame, Gibby, to propose such at Bressay-won't we, Gibby? And a thing! I'll be d-d if you'd speak then who knows but you'll tell little that way did you not expect to get a Ailsey to bring us plenty of murphies, few of these same spoonfulls, as you and eggs, and soft tack-Won't you, call 'em, whistled into your own muzmy pretty Gib? won't you, my heart zle. All the mess knows that it's not of oak:
a trifle you'll stick at when a glass “Come, come, d-n your squeezing, of grog's in the wind--and how do Jack; my banes are a' sair already you know but Davis may like the with your nonsense, I declare.” stuff as well as yourself?"
Here the whistle blew, and Grog, “0, blast him ! give the fellow his ahoy! was bellowed down the hatch- grog; I wants none on't, for my part. way. The sound was heard with a Rather cob him, I say ; for he had shout of joy ; and away scampered the plenty of time, and knew well enough cooks of the various messes with their we had the first call.” vessels to the grog-tub.
“ Avast, avast there, maties, here The mirth grew now both boisterous he comes. Come, Davis, hand round, and tumultuary ; the very sight of my buck, for we're all in a state of the grog seemed to have the effect of mutiny here :--and I say, old Catheraising the animal spirits to a higher rine Street, tip Gibby a choaker at key; and so very zealously was the once, for he's swearing he'll grog you." carousal commenced, every one in the (Chorus.) joy of his heart talking louder than " Nor never will I married be his neighbour, while ever and anon Until the day I die; the rude and boisterous chorus struck For the stormy winds and the raging sea the ear, that one would have thought Parted my love and me." that young and old, in defiance of “Well, well, maties, no more of every caution their captain had given that.-Come, Gibby, let's hear you them, were in full march to a state of give us a slice of your old pell the the most complete inebriety.
Bounty, that good old Spitzberger. I “ Scaldings, matey ; scaldings I don't see why we should'nt be as merry Hollo, you fellow ! keep that filthy as e'er a mess in the hooker on such a louse-preserver of yours out of my day as this."
"We und be dd to you !
Wouldst thee ha' nowego,y; how many
« 0, Greenland is a cold countrie, Lord Nelson on the poop did stand, And seldom is seen the sun ;
With his spy-glass all in his hand ; The keen frost and snow continually blow, And all he said, as we push'd for the land, And the day-light never is done, Was, Steady, and Cheer up, ho !”
Brave boys, “ Boatswain's mate ! Boatswain's And the day-light never is done. mate ! Below, there! You marine, d’ye But ne'er a bone of me can sing now, hear, fellow ?" a-days. It's far ower high for my auld pipe, although, nae doubt, we've
“Call the boatswain's mate forward seen the day. But, whisht !-ay, that's there, directly." something like the thing - Chorus “Ay, ay, sir. Boatswain's mate!
Forward there ; pass the word for the Farewell, and adieu to your grand Spanish boatswain's mate.” ladies,
“Hollo !” Farewell and adieu to you ladies of Spain, For we've received orders to sail for Old
“You're wanted on deck.” England,
(Chorus) But we hope in short time for to see you
" The de'il pu' your twa black een,
I wish your face I had never scen, again.
You're but a proud and a saucy quean, Tut's! here's to the Tottumfog, and a' And I winna be your dearie, 0." that's in her. May she soon nail a “ Up there, sweepers, and clear prize or twa, and then scud to Shet- away the deck ! D’ye hear there, you land as she were driving to the wud- Murphy, Davis, and the whole boiling die; for, losh, maties, I'm gaun daft of you! Come, come, no grumbling; to see our Ailie.”
it's of no use. Shoulder your brooms, “Huzza! well behaved, old Gibby and come over the deck as smartly's -ha, ha, ha!"
you like. Come, scud ! D'ye hear “ I tells thee, Tummas, thee hast there ; fly, and be d-d to you!" goutten three tots already; how many “Well, my lads, as I were saying,
we had her by this time just two “ What argufies that, my lad, when points abaft the beam-" they wa’nt half full. Come, come, “You tie an earing, you swab ! I bouse me up another, matey-there's would not allow you to stand at my a good fellow-and I'll touch you up lee-wheel. a flashy stave :-(Chorus.)
“D-n me, if I don't think, some 0, the rose it is red and the violet is blue, how or other, that our skipper will And my heart, love, beats steady and con- turn out a tartar, good weight, after stant to you;
all. He's got a smacking sharp cut Then let it be early, late, or soon, the wind of his own, and I don't like I will enjoy my rose in June.”
his top-lights at all at all." « Dang it, Tummas ! that's always " Avast there, my hearty ; after me, thy way; but I won't be sung out of if you please. I say, maties, here's my grog by ere a one. I tells thee once bad luck to Bet of the jetty, and to all more, that I'se only the plush, and the rascally smouches and humbugs that I be's entitled to, an't I now of Sheerness.”—(Chorus.) But, come, come, matey, thee needn't " Then we'll drink and be jolly, and drown be angry either-there's another for melancholy, thee."
Our spirits to cherish, our hopes, and our “ Angry !-- no, no, I'm not angry, lives, my old ship. Here's smacking luck And we'll pay all our debts with a flying to you, my dear boy, and a fistful of foretop-sail, doubloons before you are many years And so bid adieu to our sweethearts and older. Angry, in faith !--it's a very wives.” different story then. my hero ! If “ Pshaw ! d-n the song !-hear ever you see Tom Sykes angry-that's me out, maties. Well, as I were sayreal savage, I mean I'd advise you ing, by this time we were all doubleas a friend to stand clear, matey- shotted, and were just going to give don't you go for to think that he's her another physickerbeen at Copenhagen and Trafalgar for “Ha, ha, ha! My eyes ! twig canny nothing.–(Chorus.)
Shields Neddy!-malty, by the Nor’ On the glorious the second of April, all lights! at the doom of day,
“You lie, you land-crab !-I'll walk We unreef"d all our topsails, and then on a seam with e'er a man of your mess. we bore away ;
“ By the powers, you may say it, my boy!—for it's just the place for a The first is termed building a cutfellow to laugh and grow fat in. I've ter, and is merely a dramatic squib, seen a good deal now of the world, both concluded in the usual way at the exeast and west, and every point of the pence of some simple good-natured compass, my boy; and the devil fetch landsman, ignorant of the sport.me, were it in my power, but I'd pitch “ Come, shipmates," cries a known my tent in snug little Ireland before hand, “ let's have a game at building e'er a corner in it at all at all-ay, the cutter;" when, as soon as a party faith, and so would I now."
is formed, the three principal characThe bell now struck six, when the ters, of the Gentleman, the Carpenter, pipe of All hands to dance, ahoy! hura and his man Jack, are generally conried all the young men on deck in ex- trived to be thrown into the hands of cellent trim for frolic and fun of any three of the stoutest and most active description, leaving all the more grave seamen engaged. The game now comand aged below, happy in each other's mences with a conversation between conversation. Parties were speedily the Gentleman and the Carpenter; formed, and Hunt the slipper, and see and as a good deal of hurnour, as well veral other games of a similar nature, as of satire, is often thrown into it, it were immediately commenced. Other is sometimes carried on for a considerparties amused themselves with dan- able time with both wit and spirit. cing on the forecastle, to the beat of This, however, we do not pretend to the drum and the sound of the fife; aim at; merely wishing to sketch out and the grotesque manners of the huge a bare outline, by way of giving our hulks of fellows who personated the readers an idea of the game. fair sex made every side ache with Enter a Gentleman and Carpenter. laughter. The scene was new to our Gent. Good-morrow, Master Chips. hero, who enjoyed it very highly ; I wants to purchase a neat, airy, smartalthough he could hardly avoid re- sailing cutter, finely painted, and marking, that all the sports and dances handsomely rigged ;-in the newest were of the rudest description, and fashion, of course, you know. were more like the prefatory lessons Carp. Nothing gives me greater for initiating men into the mystery of pleasure than to serve your honour. bearing hard blows and heavy falls I have several cutters on hand at prewith good humour, than the pastimes sent, but not one, I believe, of your of reasonable and rational beings; description. However, you know, we for as all the frolics, of whatever na. can build you one in a very short time, ture they were, commonly ended in a and probably that will do, sir ? mock squabble, where the whole party Gent. Well enough, Master Chips, engaged mutually gave one another a provided you begin it directly. hearty drubbing with their knotted Carp. You may depend upon me, kerchiefs, taken from their necks sir. It will be sent home to you the for that purpose, in one or two in- moment it is finished. stances it actually occurred, that where Gent. Very well, Master Chips; I the parties thought themselves rather shall expect it.
(Exit. severely handled, it verged pretty Carp. I say, John;-d'ye hear there, nearly to a serious conclusion, and se- Jack?' Where the devil's that foreman veral heavy blows were interchanged of mine? You, Jack, hilloah ! with every apparent good will. This, Jack. Here I come, your honour. however, was seemingly against all Carp. Come this way, you swab; rule ; for, wherever it was like to d-n me if ever you're to be found happen, the others, by dint of ridicule when you are most wanted. We must and laughter, soon put their anger to set about building a trim spanking flight, and speedily restored good hu- cutter for Mr Broombottom directly. mour.
Come, bring me my tools, and go you and Although the subject may appear seek out a proper piece of stuff for a somewhat trivial, yet will we venture good keel to her. I don't care whether a description of two of these sports, it belongs to England, Ireland, or which we believe not to belong to the Scotland, so that it's good. Come, look class more generally known, and both sharp and thief-like, you scoundrel. of which, we can assure our readers, (Here John, after a seeming exaplease a vast deal better in the per- mination, singles out the selected informance than they can ever be ex. dividual from among the byestanders, pected to do from a brief description. and brings him forward, saying :)