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vulgar and stupifying predecessor, port
wine. No, it was a tint more exquiTHE PRIEST'S HORSE. site still," which claret, that sober, Proficies nihil hoc, cædas licet usque fagello, alone communicate to the human face
sedate, cool and delicious liquid, can Si tibi purpureo de grege currit equus, Martial. Lib. xiv. Epig. 55. divine." The dress of the clergyman
was evidently as antiquated as his It is not many weeks since I dined with complexion. The head was surmounted a Roman Catholic family in the neigh- by a little, close, brown wig, divided by bourhood of Dublin. I had beer but a few a single curl, and which appeared to be minutes in the dining-room, when I found pasted to the perieranium on which it that the centre of attraction, “the observ.. was fixed. Around his neck was a neat, ved of all observers," was a very old gen- black silk stock, over which a milktleman, whose dress, appearance, and white muslin band was turned. His demeanour, at once betrayed him to me black coat was cut in the manner of the as one of the old Catholic Clergymen of primitive quakers ; his dark silk Ireland. Father, or, as he was most waistcoat had large flaps which nearly generally termed, Doctor Reilly, covered the whole of his “ nether garseemed to be in age not less than seventy ment," and that was fastened at the years; and the abstraction of his man- knees by large silver clasps, while ner, before dinner, as to every thing thick silk stockings embraced his plump passing around him, would induce the little legs; and then, his square-toed belief that he had already attained his shoes were nearly concealed from the second childhood. His face was that of view by the enormous silver buckles pure, rich, bright scarlet, which can placed upon them. I was assured by neither be imparted to the countenance several, that the little old gentleman, by the consumption of an extra-quan- whom I had not heard give utterance to tity of whisky punch, nor its still more a single word, was one of the most Vol. IX.
pleasant men I could meet with ; and then, it was an egotism that gave a verithat after dinner, he would amuse me similitude to every thing he told, and extremely. I could perceive no out- you believed that he was not mentionward mark of genius about the Reverend ing any thing which he did not know to Doctor ; he took no notice of the con be a fact, however strange, extraordiversation that was going on around nary, or improbable it might seem to be. him ; and the only demonstration of Amongst the other stories told by Doctor intelligence I could discover in him, Reilly was the following, which I have was the somewhat hasty glance he oc endeavoured to report verbatim et litecasionally turned to the door, (as each ratim, as I heard it. new visiter was announced), as if he “Never, my children, never borron expected that the welcome news of a priest's horse—it's an unlucky thing “ Dinner on the table" was about being to do, for many reasons. First, if the proclaimed to him. To me he appeared priest's borse is a good one, he does not like the canon in Gil Blas, as one dis- like to lend it. Next, if it is a bad one, posed to partake of the good things that and the priest says he will lend it, the might be laid before him at the festive moment you ask for it, you may happen board, but neither inclined nor capaci- to break your neck, or your leg, or tated to increase their pleasures by any may-be your nose, and thereby spoil contribution of wit or fancy.
your beauty. And, lastly, a priest's Dinner, that grand epoch in the his- horse has so many friends, that if you tory of the day, was at last announced ; are in a hurry, it will be shorter for ladies, even in an Irish assembly, were you to walk than to wait for the horse forgotten, and twenty hands were stret to pay its visits. It is now more than ched out to the Doctor to conduct him fifty years since I gave the very counsel, to the dining-room. At dinner, I heard that I am now administering to you, to nothing of the Doctor until the first flask Kit M'Gowran, one of my parishioners; of Champaigne was uncorked ; and then but he thought, as may be many of you there broke upon the ear a mellow, think, that the priest was a fool, but he little voice, in which the polished bro- found the difference in a short time, as gue of the Irish gentleman, softened may-be most of you will before you die. down by the peculiarity of a French “ As well as I recollect, it was in the accent, could be distinguished. The year 1789, that I was parish priest of voice, I was told, belonged to the Doc. Leixlip, and at that time Kit M Gowran tor, who was just then asking Mrs. was, of a farmer lad, one of my wealour hostess, to take wine with him. At thiest parishioners. He had land on each remove the voice became stronger ; an old lease, and might have been a and by the time that the dessert was on grand juror now, if he had minded the the table, the tones of the Doctor's potatoes growing ; but instead of that, voice were full, loud, and strong, and it Kit was always up in Dublin, playwas soon permitted to sweep, uncon- ing rackets and balls, and drinking trolled, over the entire range of the as much whisky in a week, as would society. The puny punsters became float a canal boat through a lock. For dumb, the small talkers were silent; two or three years, Kit was but little
nor woman either,” pre- seen in the parish, though I must say to sumed to open their mouths except to his credit, he always sent me my dues laugh at his Reverence's anecdotes, or regularly, so that you perceive he was to imbibe the good things which my not a reprobate entirely. I was sorry worthy friend L had set before to hear the neighbours talking bad of them.
him, and was thinking of looking after I have heard story-tellers, in my time, him some time or another, when I would but never felt the pleasure in listening have nothing else to do; when one day, to them, that I did in attending to the Kit came into my house dressed out in anecdotes of the Reverend Doctor the pink of the fashion of that time. He Reilly. The manner, the look, and the was then what they called, I believe, a tone, added, I know, considerably to the macaroni, and was the same sort of anieffect ; but such are the gifts of a good mal, that is now termed a dandy. He story-teller, and they can neither be had a little hat, that would not go on a transferred to paper, nor communicated good plougbman's fist; his hair was by an oral retailer. One great charm, streeling down his back and over his too, for me,
in all these stories, was, shoulders; the buttons on his coat were that the narrator was, in some way or the size of saucepans, and the skirts of another, concerned in thein. There the coat hung down behind to the small was, to be sure, egotism in this ; but of his leg; he had two watches, one on
and no man,
each side of his stomach, a waistcoat next morning that Kit M'Gowran came that did not cover his breast, and light for the horse, and, in addition to his leather small-clothes that came down dress the day before, he had a pair of below the calf, and were fastened there spurs on him that would do for a fightwith bunches of ribbons, that were eaching cock, they were so long and so as big as cauliflowers. Kit I saw was sharp; and a whip that was like a in great spirits, and had evidently some fishing-rod. mad project in his head; but that, you Well, Kit,' says I, when are you know, was none of my business, if he to be married ?' did not choose to tell me of it. I had “At ten, your Reverence,' answered not, however, to ask him ; for he men- Kit,' at ten to the minute.' tioned at once what brought him to his 66. Then, Kit, my boy,' said I, ' you parish priest. Poor Kit laboured under should have been here at six to be in a great defect, for he stuttered so dread time, since you intend to ride the black fully, that you should know him for horse.' seven years before you could understand “66 Oh! bother,' said Kit; “sure I am a word he said to you. He had a tongue only six miles from town, and it's hard that was exactly like a one-nibbed pen, if I don't ride that in an hour,--so that --which will splutter and splash, and in fact I'll be before iny time, and that tease, and vex you, and do every thing wont be genteel ; for may-be I'd catch but express the sentiments of your mind. Nelly Brangan with her hair in papers;
“ Kit told me, in his own way, that and she wont look lovely that way, he was going to be married the next know, whatever charms there may be day to a Miss Nelly Brangan, a rich in the butter-cool of gold guineas that huckster's daughter in Dublin, who the darling is going to give me.' was bringing him a large fortune, and 6. Well, mount at once,' I observed, that he had accordingly, as in duty though I would advise you, if you are bound, come to me for his sar-tifi-cat; in a hurry- to walk.' and as a propitiation to me for the bad “I had hardly said the word, when life he had led, he gave me a golden Kit jumped into the saddle, and gave his guinea, and a very neat miniature of the horse a whip and a spurand off it same coin. I could not refuse my cer- cantered, as if it were in as great a tificate to such a worthy parishioner; hurry to be married as Kit himself. I and after wishing him long life and followed them as fast as I could to the happiness, and plenty of boys and girls, top of the hill, and there was Kit cutting I thought Kit would be after bidding the figure of six like any cavalry officer me good morning. Kit, I found, had with his whip, and now and again still something upon his mind. I asked plunging his heels into the horse's him if I could oblige him farther: "Why, sides, and it kicking the stones before Father Reilly,' says Kit, that is a and behind it, and tattering over the mighty purty little black horse of yours.' road like lightning. In half a minute • It is indeed, child,' I answered; but they were both out of my sight, and I it is very apt to go astray; for it left me thought that if any one could get to for a week, and only returned to me Dublin with the horse in an hour, Kit last night.''. Ah! then, Father Reilly,' M'Gowran was the man to do it. says he, it would be mighty respect “ For two miles of the road Kit went able to see me riding up to-morrow on gallantly. He was laughing and morning to Miss Nelly Brangan's shop- joking, and thinking to himself that I door with such an elegant black horse was only humbugging him in what I under me. May-be you'd lend me a said about the horse, when in the very loan of it?'. Indeed, child, I will,' I middle of a hard gallop, it stopped as if replied, but I would not advise you to it had been shot, and up went Kit take it; for my horse has a way of its M‘Gowran in the air, his long whip own and I have many friends between firmly fixed in his hand, and his long this and Dublin, that may-be it would coat flying like a kite's tail after him, sooner see than go to your wedding.' and the words, “Who had the luck to "Oh! as to that,' answered Kit; ' if it see Donnybrook fair,' in his mouth ; was the devil himself, begging your and he had not time to cease saying Reverence's pardon, I'd make him trot; them when he was landed bead over so lend me the horse and I'll send it heels in a meadow, seven or eight back to you to-morrow evening.' yards froin the centre of the road! Kit « Take it then, Kit,' said I ; but I warn was completely puzzled by the fall, he you that it is an uneasy beast.'
could not tell how he got there, or what " It was not until eight o'clock the caused it, or why he should be there at
all, instead of being on the horse's his neck in the attempt, that he would back, until he looked about him, and be in Dublin to the minute he had prosaw the creature taking a fine comfort- mised, so that the instant he was on the able drink at a little well by the side horse's back again, he began cutting, of the road, where I always stopped to and whipping, and spurring the beauty refresh it. Kit after scratching his as hard and fast as his hands and legs head, and his elbows, and the back would go-his legs particularly were
of his coat ; and indeed they re- working as fast as the arms of a windquired it--for they were a little warmer mill on a stormy day. The horse was than when he set out-went over to the not at first disposed to resent any inhorse, mounted it, and rode off again on dignity that was offered to it, particuhis journey; but I give you my word larly after the good feed and the good he did not gallop so fast nor use the drink that it had got, so that it trotted whip so much as he had before the on pretty quickly for half a mile or so; horse took a sup of the well water. but Kit still continuing to whip and
“The horse rode on as peaceable as spur it, it first let on to him by one or a judge, and as if it were a poor priest, two kicks, that it was displeased; but and not a rollocking young layman that Kit not taking the hint, it stagged enwas on its back; it went on so for tirely. Kit lashed more furiously than about three quarters of a mile further, he had done before the horse curvetted but when it got that distance Kit began about the road – it reared--it prancedto wonder at the way it was edging over it kicked-it went in a circle round the to the right side of the road. Kit pulled same point fifty times. Kit leathered to the left, but the horse still held on to away with his long whip upon its ears, the right; and while they were arguing and nose, and the horse backed and this point with one another, the day, backed, until it at last left Kit back at coach from Dublin kept driving up to Tim Divine's door, from which he had them. The guard sounded his horn, started about an hour before! Tim as much as to say, “Kit M'Gowran, was astonished to see the animal so don't be taking up the entire road with soon coming back to him for another yourself and your horse.' Kit knew feed; but having been informed by Kit very well what the guard meant, and of the way he had misbehaved towards he gave a desperate drag to his own (theit, Tim became the interpreter for the left) side of the road; but the horse in- poor dumb creature, and told the rider sisted upon the right, and the coach that the best manner of managing it driving up in the same line, the leaders was to let it go as it liked. knocked up against my horse, and sent “Poor Kit resigned himself to his it and Kit into the ditch together to set- fate; that he should be late at his own tle there any little difference of opinion wedding, he saw was inevitable ; he that might be between them ! How long was now too much tired to walk, and Kit lay in the ditch he could not rightly with a sigh he flung the reins on the tell; but when he got out of it, he went horse's neck, and encouraged it to proto look after the horse, and about five ceed again towards Dublin. It set off a yards nearer to Dublin than where the second time from Divine's door; but accident had happened, he found the ceased to gallop, to canter, or to trotlittle darling taking a feed of oats, on it went at a most discreet pace, and which it always got from one of my pa
as sober and as melancholy as if it had rishioners, when I travelled that road; felt sorry for disappointing him, or that and now that he is dead and gone, poor it was travelling with myself to a friend's man! (Tim Divine was his name,) i funeral. must say I never got any thing else “ Kit could at last hear the town bells from him. Kit waited patiently till the striking one o'clock-he was at Islandhorse had eaten its fill, and he then Bridge, and within view of Dublin-he looked at one of his watches, and it told could see Patrick's sleeple pointing up him that it was ten o'clock, and he then into the sky, and looking as stiff and looked at the other, and it as plainly conceited as if it were rejoiced at the shewed him that it was nine to the mi- annoyance of a Papist, while the arches nute. Kit knew how his watches went, of “Bloody-bridge" seemed to be laughand he accordingly guessed that the ing to their full extent at the impudence truth lay between them; so that he of such a young fellow riding into Dubfound he had but half an hour to go a lin upon no less a horse than the fadistance of four miles at least, to where vourite pony of the parish priest of he was to be married.
Leixlip! So at least, Kit was thinking, “ Kit determined if he was to brea when the creature remembered that I
always stopped a day or two with Mrs. to see a robber seized, when he felt his Robinson, a kind, good-body of a wi arms grappled by two stout friezedow woman, that lived at the end of the coated countrymen, who both exclaimed bridge. In there it plunged ; to the in the same moment-'Where did you narrow little hole of a stable, never get the horse, you robber?' thinking of my friend Kit on its back, “ Poor stuttering Kit stammered out, and in entering the door, he was swept '1-1-1-8-8-8-got it-it-itclean of its back, and left stretched “Where, you sacrilegious thief?' upon a dunghill, with his nose, face, “In L-1-1- Leixlip,' said Kit, and hands all scratched, by the new after many minutes, and twisting his dashed wall against which he had been tongue like a ha'p'orth of tobacco, in driven! He cursed, but that he found his mouth, to make himself understood. did not cure his hands; he swore, but “Oh! the villain,' said Paddy, he that he perceived did not improve his has confessed it.' appearance; so that he soon desisted «« Yes he has, the scoundrel,' exfrom such modes of venting his passion; claimed Dennis ; ' and do you see the and after washing his hands, putting a
confusion of the fellow he can't speak, few plaisters on his face, rubbing the he is so frightened at the thought of dirt off his small-clothes, and coaxing being hanged. Drag him off the horse, the little horse out of the small stable, and take him to the police office.' he again mounted, and rode off for " In a minute Kit was torn from the Dublin,
,-a far uglier, and less conse borse. A crowd collected around him, quential personage, than when he had who were immediately informed by cantered up the bill of Leixlip that Paddy and Dennis, that they had seized morning.
a robber, who had 'stolen a priest's “ Kit was now in Barrack-street- horse, and was going to sell him in he was, át two o'clock, just four hours Dublin.' Poor Kit was instantly asafter the stated time in the city! “Now,' sailed by the mob - his two watches thought Kit to himself, “my troubles dragged out of his fobs—his new coat are at length all over, and I have only torn to pieces-his little hat kicked to to make the best apology I can for my nothing and his pantaloons covered unaccountable absence to my darling with mud. Several times he attempted Mrs. M'Gowran, that is to be my little to say that he had got a loan of the bride--the wealthy Miss Nelly Brangan horse; but the people were in too great that was. Such were Kit thoughts, a rage to attend to his stuttering, and when he heard two men talking behind he was dragged into the police office. him
Paddy and Dennis preferred a charge 6 Paddy, isn't that the horse we of horse-stealing against him; and he were bid to be on the look-out for ?' was such a dirty-looking blackguard,
By dad, Dennis, if it isn't, it's that the police officers at once handvery like it ;-and do you see the fellow cuffed him, advised him to plead guilty, that's riding it? He is mighty like the and removed him into the black hole, chap that was hung for horse-stealing where he passed the night! at the last assizes.'
- But this did not end the misfortunes ""So like, Paddy, that if it is isn't of unlucky Kit M'Gowran; for Miss him, I'd take my oath it's one of the Nelly Brangan, after inviting all her same gang. The horse, you know, is friends to a wedding dinner, and a large missing these five days; and do you evening party, was deterinined that they see the patches on the robber's face should not be disappointed. She waited that's to disguise himself. A decent patiently for Kit until the dinner was dressed man wouldn't be in a fight, dressed, and then-bestowed her like one of us, Paddy, when we get a hand and fortune upon one of her. sup in our head.'
neighbours, a Mr. James Deroy, who 16. That's true for you, Dennis; and was to be bridesman to Kit; but who, see, it has lob-ears, wall-eyes, bald- in his absence, resolved to discharge face, and a docked tail;—it's the very those duties for which Kit had been borse. By ry sowkins, we'll seize particularly engaged. him,-he's a robber.'
“This, my young friends, I hope will " . To be sure we will, Paddy,-he's be a warning to you. Never borrow a a robber, and an unchristian robber too, priest's horse, lest you should lose by to steal from a priest! Knock hini the loan, a wife, a fortune, your liberty, down, Paddy!'
two watches, and a new coat. 666 That I will, and welcome, Dennis !!
Tait's Edin. Mag. “ Kit was in the act of turning round