218 A slip of the Tongue. some one was a long time at the door, came forward, and I heard the girl say, "Oh ma'am! here's a foreigner at the door wants something-but I can't understand a word he says." I was much amused, and called out to the lady, who immediately recognized my voice, and we enjoyed a hearty laugh at the adventure. It has been remarked that stammerers can always sing and swear, without any interruption from their malady. I can in my own case attest the truthfulness of this statement. In my early life I used to chant what I was desirous of saying, when I had much to communicate, and I could always do this without the slightest difficulty, as the continuous flow of sound was uninterrupted. I regret to say that I also acquired a bad habit of interlarding my conversation with oaths, where I could do this without giving offence, and it helped me very much in my utterance by giving emphasis and force to what I had to say. I had great difficulty in after-life to break myself of this profane and vulgar habit, and I remember one instance in particular where the force of habit was rather singularly developed, when I thought I had gained the complete mastery of it. One day at the Museum the gentleman at the head of my department came to me in haste, asking for "Facciolati's Italian Lexicon :" it was out of its place, and I made several abortive attempts to tell him who had taken it. Finding that I was baffled at every point, I so far forgot myself as to recur to my old habit, and with a most emphatic oath told him at once who had taken the book. Of course I immediately apologized for this unwarrantable rudeness, and was forgiven as quickly. This habit of swearing had become as inveterate as my stammering, and even in more advanced life, I have had to lay considerable restraint upon my "unruly member" whenever I have been stirred with strong feelings, lest I should inadvertently forget myself and recur to my old habit. Swearing is like swimming, when once acquired it can never be forgotten. I always felt the annoyance of my stammering most of all in conversation, and it has denied me the privilege of that free and unrestrained interchange of thought which is the chief charm of friendship. Hundreds of times have I gone away from the society of men and women of cultivated minds, who would have freely responded to any demands made upon them, but the thoughts that came to my lips rarely or ever found expression; and I have sought, when I have left their company, to relieve my labouring chest and wounded feelings by holding an imaginary conversation with myself, just by way of letting off the steam. The poor timid man, that may company, sometimes be seen in "who stands aloof, nor mingles with The young That feels himself an isolated being, A very wilderness of widow'd thought!"— demands our tenderest sympathy, for he loves sweet social converse, but he is forced to sit silent, because "Nervous dread and sensitive shame Freeze the current of his speech." Those only can fully sympathize with these sufferers who have themselves gone through the agonizing ordeal. I recollect some years since meeting with a man, of distinguished ability as a civil engineer, who stammered so fearfully that he could scarcely articulate two words in succession without the most painful and distressing contortions of countenance. The anxious and beseeching look of this sufferer, when attempting to speak, was most painful, and I have sometimes grasped his hand and begged him to desist, as the efforts he made were so violent that I dreaded the consequences to himself. 220 Stammering Curable. It is fortunate that the habit of stammering is rarely seen to afflict females, although the instance named by me in the early part of my history was a notable exception. To see the countenance of a woman distorted by this terrible malady would be a sad drawback upon the pleasure we derive from the uninterrupted flow of their eloquent tongues. If Lord Byron disliked to see women eat, it is questionable if he would have enjoyed the society of his fair friends, the Countesses of Guicciolo and Blessington, had they been stammerers. 66 After all my experiences of pseudo-curers of stammering, it is a consolation to me to know that the disease, or habit, bad as it is, will really give way under skilful and persevering treatment. In my own case I have had the double misfortune of not only suffering the mortification incident to the malady itself, but also the bitter feeling of having fallen into the hands of those who promised me a perfect cure," and when that failed, cast the entire blame of their failure upon myself. It is no small pleasure to be able to refer to one among the many who offer their professional services to those who suffer from this affliction, who, I know, possesses all the means at his disposal of relieving the most deeply-seated impediment of speech; and with this concluding remark I will dismiss the subject. I may add, however, that the gentleman I have referred to is not aware, until these pages meet his eye, that I should so pointedly allude to himself in this matter of stammering. In the spring of the following year I had a return of the mental depression that I had previously suffered, which lasted for several months, during which period I found that it was with very great difficulty I continued to discharge my ordinary daily duties. These attacks of depression were the more. trying from the fact of there being little or nothing in my outward appearance to indicate ill-health; and as sufferers from these complaints are generally supposed to be persons too ready to yield to despondency, I had abundance of advice from Medical Sympathy. 221 my friends not to let anything worry me, and to try and take matters quietly and easily. It is in vain to recount to any but a medical man the long catalogue of melancholy symptoms incident to this form of disease; and it has been a great relief to me to pour out my complaints to one both skilful and kind. The medical profession are justly famed for their tender and delicate treatment of some of the more trying maladies that "flesh is heir to," and but for this intelligent and sympathizing treatment in my own case, I think my sufferings would have ended in black despair. Everything was done for me that medical skill could suggest, but my doctor insisted upon my appropriating my vacation to obtaining rest and recreation, instead of using it, as had been the case for many years, to purposes of business with the view of increasing my finances. I saw and felt the necessity of this advice, and acted accordingly. As these vacation rambles are amongst the most pleasant reminiscences of my life, I shall endeavour to recall a few particulars relating to them. BRIEF RECOLLECTIONS OF SOME VACATION RAMBLES, WITH THOUGHTS AND GLEANINGS BY THE WAY. "When thou haply seest Some rare note-worthy object in thy travels, "As odours, press'd in summer hours So memory's magic wand restores And in a flood of music pours N recording these wanderings, of course, I do not write for the information of those who have gone over the ground themselves, nor for those who contemplate such rambles, as the world-known "Handbooks" of John Murray, and Adam and Charles Black; the "Practical Guides,” and the "special edition of Bradshaw's Continental Guide," will afford correct and ample information upon all points connected with such peregrinations. I simply record my own impressions of places that I have visited, and people that I have seen, for the amusement of my friends and the entertainment of those who, |