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the mouth. Therefore, precisely, can you carry your
good will to the maid?

SHAL. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her?
SLEN. I hope, Sir-I will do as it shall become one that
would do reason.

EVANS. Nay, Got's lords and His ladies, you must speak
possitable: if you can carry her your desires towards her.
SHAL. That you must. Will you, upon good dowry,
marry her?

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SLEN. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your request, cousin, in any reason.

SHAL. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz; what I do is to pleasure you, coz. Can you love the maid? SLEN. I will marry her, Sir, at your request; but if there be no great love in the beginning, yet Heaven may decrease it upon better acquaintance, when we are married, and have more occasion to know one another. I hope upon familiarity will grow more content. But if you say Marry her, I will marry her: that I am freely dissolv'd, and dissolutely.

233

EVANS. It is a fery discretion answer; save the 1fall' is in the 'ort dissolutely: the 'ort is, according to our meaning, resolutely.-His meaning is good.

SHAL. Ay, I think my cousin meant well.

SLEN. Ay, or else I would I might be hang'd, la.

Re-enter ANNE PAGE.

SHAL. Here comes fair Mistress Anne.-Would I were young for your sake, Mistress Anne!

240

ANNE. The dinner is on the table; my father desires

your Worships' company.

SHAL. I will wait on him, fair Mistress Anne.

EVANS. 'Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the [Exeunt SHALLOW and SIR H. EVANS.

grace.

ANNE. Will 't please your Worship to come in, Sir?
SLEN. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily: I am very

well.

ANNE. The dinner attends you, Sir.

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SLEN. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth.-Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, go, wait upon my cousin

1 fault.

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ACT I

Sc. I

Shallow. [Exnt SIMPLE.] A Justice of Peace sometime may be beholding to his friend for a man.-I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother be dead. But what though? yet I live like a poor gentleman born. ANNE. I may not go in without your Worship: they will not sit till you come.

SLEN. I'faith, I'll eat nothing. I thank you as much as though I did.

ANNE. I pray you, Sir, walk in.

SLEN. I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruis'd my shin th' other day with playing at sword and dagger with a master of fence (three veneys1 for a dish of stew'd prunes), and, by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot meat since. Why do your dogs bark so?

be there bears i' th' town?

ANNE. I think there are, Sir: I heard them talk'd of.

SLEN. I love the sport well; but I shall as soon quarrel

at it as any man in England. the bear loose, are you not? ANNE. Ay, indeed, Sir. SLEN. That's meat and drink to me now! I have seen Sackerson loose, twenty times; and have taken him by the chain. But, I warrant you, the women have so cried and shriek'd at it, that it pass'd. But women, indeed, cannot abide 'em: they are very ill-favour'd, rough things.

PAGE. Come, gentle Master Slender, come: we stay for you.
SLEN. I'll eat nothing-I thank you, Sir.

PAGE. By cock and pye, you shall not choose, Sir: come,

come.

SLEN. Nay, pray you, lead the way.

PAGE. Come on, Sir.

SLEN. Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first.

ANNE. Not I, Sir; pray you, keep on.

SLEN. Truly, I will not go first, truly, la: I will not do

you that wrong.

ANNE. I

SLEN. I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome: you do yourself wrong, indeed, la.

SCENE II. The Same.

Enter SIR HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE.

EVANS. GO your ways, and ask of Doctor Caius' house which is the way: and there dwells one Mistress Quickly, which is in the manner of his nurse, or his dry nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and his wringer.

SIM. Well, Sir.

EVANS. Nay, it is petter yet. Give her this letter; for it is a 'oman that altogether's acquaintance with Mistress Anne Page; and the letter is, to desire and require her to solicit your master's desires to Mistress Anne Page: I pray you, be gone. I will make an end of my dinner; there's pippins and cheese to come. [exeunt.

SCENE III. A Room in the Garter.

Enter FALSTAFF, Host, BARDOLPH, NYM, PISTOL,

and ROBIN.

FAL. Mine Host of the Garter

HOST. What says my bully-rook? Speak scholarly, and wisely.

FAL. Truly, mine Host, I must turn away some of my followers.

HOST. Discard, bully Hercules; cashier; let them wag; trot, trot!

FAL. I sit at ten pounds a week.

HOST. Thou 'rt an Emperor, Cæsar, Keiser, and Pheazar. I will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw, he shall tap: said I well, bully Hector?

FAL. Do so, good mine Host.

II

HOST. I have spoke; let him follow. Let me see thee froth1 and lime.2 I am at a word: follow. [Exit Host. FAL. Bardolph, follow him. A tapster is a good trade: an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a wither'd servingman, a fresh tapster. Go; adieu.

BARD. It is a life that I have desir'd; I will thrive.

[Exit BARDOLPH.

1 soap a tankard.

2 sophisticate with lime.

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ACT I
Sc. III

PIST. O base Hungarian wight! wilt thou the spigot wield?

NYм. He was gotten in drink. Is not the humour conceited?

FAL. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinder-box. His
thefts were too open: his filching was like an unskilful
singer, he kept not time.

NYм. The good humour is, to steal at a minim's rest.
PIST. Convey the wise it call. Steal? foh! a fico1 for

the phrase !

FAL. Well, Sirs, I am almost out at heels.

PIST. Why then let kibes2 ensue.

FAL. There is no remedy: I must coney-catch; I must

shift.3

PIST. Young ravens must have food.

FAL. Which of you know Ford of this town?
PIST. I ken the wight; he is of substance good.
FAL. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.
PIST. Two yards, and more.

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FAL. No quips now, Pistol; indeed I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife. I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation. I can construe the action of her familiar style, and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be English'd rightly, is I am Sir John Falstaff's.

4

PIST. He hath studied her well, and translated her ill:
out of honesty into English.

NYM. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass ?
FAL. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of her
husband's purse: he hath legions of angels."

50

PIST. As many devils entertain; and To her, boy, say I. NYM. The humour rises; it is good; humour me the angels.

FAL. I have writ me here a letter to her: and here another to Page's wife; who even now gave me good eyes too, examin'd my parts with most judicious illiads: sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly.

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PIST. Then did the Sun on dunghill shine.
NYM. I thank thee for that humour.

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FAL. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning-glass. Here's another letter to her; she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be cheater1 to them both, and they shall be Exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go, bear thou this letter to Mistress Page; and thou this to Mistress Ford: we will thrive, lads, we will thrive.

PIST. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become,

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And by my side wear steel? Then, Lucifer take all!

NYM. I will run no base humour; here, take the humour letter; I will keep the 'haviour of reputation.

FAL. [to ROBIN.] Hold, sirrah, bear you these letters tightly;2

Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.

Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hailstones, go;
Trudge, plod-away o' the hoof! Seek shelter, pack!
Falstaff will learn the humour of this age:
French thrift, you rogues! myself, and skirted page.
[Exeunt FALSTAFF and ROBIN.
PIST. Let vultures gripe thy guts! For gourd and fullam3

holds,

And high and low* beguile the rich and poor!

Tester I'll have in pouch, when thou shalt lack,

Base Phrygian Turk!

NYM. I have operations which be humours of revenge.

PIST. Wilt thou revenge?

NYм. By Welkin and her stars!

PIST. With wit, or steel?

NYM. With both the humours, I:

I will discuss the humour of this love to Page.
And I to Ford shall eke unfold,

PIST.

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80

90

ACT I

Sc. III

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