It is time, however, at laft, to vindicate my claims, and as these entertainers of the public, as they call themselves, have partly lived upon me for fome years; let me now try if I cannot live a little upon myself. I would defire, in this cafe, to imitate the fat man whom I have fomewhere heard of in a shipwreck, who, when the failors, preft by famine, were taking flices from his pofteriors to fatisfy their hunger, infifted, with great juftice, on having the firft cut for himself.

Yet, after all, I cannot be angry with any who take it into their heads to think that whatever I write is worth reprinting, particularly when I confider how wet great a majority will think it fcarce with reading. Trifling and fuperficial, are terms of reproach that are eafily objected, and that carry an air of penetration in the obferver. These faults have been objected to the following Effays; and it must be owned, in fome measure, that the charge is true. However, I could have made them more metaphyfical, had I thought fit; but I would ask, whether, in a fhort effay, it is not neceffary to be fuperficial? Before we have prepared to enter into the depths of a fubject, in the ufual forms, we have got to the bottom of our fcanty page, and thus lose the honours of a victory by too tedious a preparation for the combat.

There is another fault in this collection of trifles, which I fear will not be fo eafily pardoned. It will be alledged that the humour of them (if any be found) is ftale and hackneyed. This may be true enough, as matters now ftand; but I may with great truth affert, that the humour was new when I wrote it.

of

Since that time, indeed, many of the topics which were first started here, have been hunted down, and many of the thoughts blown upon. In fact, thefe Effays were confidered as quietly laid in the grave oblivion; and our modern compilers, like fextons and executioners, think it their undoubted right to pillage the dead.

However, whatever right I have to complain of the public, they can, as yet, have no just reason to complain of me. If I have written dull Effays, they have hitherto treated them as dull Effays. Thus far we are at least upon a par; and until they think fit to make me their humble debtor by praise, I am refolved not to lofe a fingle inch of my felf-importance. Instead, therefore, of attempting to establish a credit amongst them, it will perhaps be wiser to apply, to fome more diftant correfpondent; and as my drafts are in fome danger of being protefted at home, it may not be imprudent, upon this occafion, to draw my bills upon pofterity. "Mr. Pofterity"Sir, Nine hundred and ninety-nine years after

fight hereof, pay the bearer, or order, a thoufand pounds worth of praise, free from all deductions whatfoever, it being a commodity that will then be ferviceable to him, and place it to the account of," &c.

ESSAYS.

A
9th Jainy 1832.

ESSAY

S.

ESSAY I.

The Author's Modefty. Bookfellers. Authors owe their Succefs partly to merit, partly to fortunate Circumftances. Story of the deformed Travellers

HERE is not, perhaps, a more whimsical

THE

figure in nature, than a man of real modefty who affumes an air of impudence; who, while his heart beats with anxiety, ftudies eafe, and affects good-humour. In this situation, however, every unexperienced writer finds himfelf. Impreffed with the terrors of the tribunal before which he is going to appear, his natural humour is turned to pertnefs, and for real wit he is obliged to fubftitute vivacity.

For my part, as I was never diftinguished for addrefs, and have often even blundered in making my bow, I am at a lofs whether to be merry or fad on this folemn occafion. Should I modeftly decline

all merit, it is too probable the hafty reader may take me at my word. If, on the other hand, like labourers in the Magazine trade, I humbly prefume to promise an epitome of all the good things that were ever faid or written, thofe readers I most defire to please may forsake me.

My bookfeller, in this dilemma, perceiving my embarraffment, inftantly offered his affiftance and advice: "You must know, Sir," fays he, "that the republic of letters is at prefont divided intofeveral claffes. One writer excels at a plan, or a title-page; another works away the body of the * book; and a third is a dab at an index. Thus, "a Magizine is not the refult of any fingle man's

indufry; but goes through as many hands as a

new pin, before it is fit for the public. I fancy, *Sir," continues he, "I can provide an eminent hand, and upon moderate terms, to draw up a promifing plan to fmooth up our readers a little, and pay them, as Colonel Charteris paid his feraglio, at the rate of three half-pence in hand, and three fhillings more in promises."

4.6

He was proceeding in his advice, which, however, I thought proper to decline, by affuring him, that as I intended to purfue no fixed method, fo it was impoffible to form any regular plan: determined 'never to be tedious in order to be logical, wherever pleafure prefented, I was refolved to follow.

It will be improper, therefore, to pall the reader's curiofity, by leffening his furprize; or anticipate any pleasure I am able to procure him, by saying what, hall come next. Happy, could any effort of mine

bus

but reprefs one criminal pleasure, or but for a moment fill up an interval of anxiety; how gladly would I lead mankind from the vain profpects of life, the profpects of innocence and eafe, where every breeze breathes health, and every found is but the echo of tranquility!

But, whatever may be the merit of his intentions, every writer is now convinced that he must be chiefly indebted to good fortune for finding readers willing to allow him any degree of reputation. It has been remarked, that almost every character which has excited either attention or pity, has owed part of its fuccefs to merit, and part to an happy concurrence of circumftances in its favour. Had Cæfar or Cromwell exchanged countries, the one might have been a ferjeant, and the other an excifeman. So it is with wit, which generally fucceeds more from being happily addreffed, than from its native poignancy. A jeft calculated to spread at a gaming-table, may be received with perfect indifference, should it happen to drop in a mackarel-boat. We have all feen dunces triumph in fome companies, where men of real humour were disregarded, by a general combination in favour of ftupidity. To drive the observation as far as it will go, fhould the labours of a writer, who defigns his performances for readers of a more refined. appetite, fall into the hands of a devourer of compi lations, what can he expect but contempt and confufion? If his merits are to be determined by judges who eftimate the value of a book from its bulk, or its frontispiece, every rival must acquire an eafy fuperiority, who with perfuafive eloquence promises four A 6.

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