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Now in contiguous drops the food comes ! The vicar once a week creeps in, down.

Sits with his knees up to his chin; hreatening with deluge this devoted town. Here conns his notes, and takes a whet, o hops in crouds the daggled females tiy, Till the small ragged Hock is met. retend to cheapen goods, but notizing buy. A traveller, who by did pass, he templar spruce, while every spout 's abroach Cbserv'd the roof bhi d the grass ; ay's till 'tis tair, yet seems to call a coach. On tiptoe stood, and rear'd his fnout, he tuck'd-up semîrels walks with hasty ftrides, And law the parson creeping out; Thile itreams run down her oild umbrella's Was much surpriz'd to see a crow fides.

Venture to build his neft fo low. ere various kinds, by various fortunes led, A school-boy ran unto't, and thought, ommence acquaintance underneath a pod. The crib was down, the blackbird caught. riumphant Tories and despording Whigs A third, who lost his way by night, orget their feads, and join to fave their wigs. Was forc'd for safety to alight; ox'd in a chair, the beau impatient : ts, And, stepping o'er the facric-roof, "hte spouts run clattering o'er the roof by fts, His horse had like to spoil his boof. od ever and anon with frightful din

Warburton* took it in his noddle, be l:ather Counds; he treinbles from within. This building was design da model

when Troy chairmen bore the wonden steed, Or of a pigeon-house or oven, regnant with Greeks impatient to be freed, To bake one loaf, and keep one dove in. l'bose bully Grecks, who, as the moderns do, Then Mrs. Johnsont gave her verdict, tead of paying chairmen, ran them through) And every one was plea:'d that heard it: locoon struc?: the outside with his spear, All that you make this ftir about, nd each imprison'd hero qua' ior fear. Is but a still which wants a spout. Now from all parts the swelling kennels flow, The revererd Dr. Raymond guess'd ad bear their trophies with them as they go : More probably tha: all the reit; ilths of all hues ard odours seem to tell

He said, but that it wanted room, i bat ftreet they sail'd from by their fight and It might have been a pigmy's tomb. fmell.

The Doctor's family came by, "hey, as each torrent drives, with rapid force, And little miss began to cry ; rom Smithfield or St. 'Pulchre's shape their Give me that houfe in my own hand! course,

Then madam bade the chariot stand, ind in huge confluence join'd at Snowhill ridge, Call?d to the clerk, in manner mild, all from the conduit prone to Holbourn bridge. Pray, reach that thing here to the child; weepings from butchers' stalls, dung, guts That thing, I meai , among the kale : and blood.

And here is to buy a pot of ale. Drown'd puppies, stinkit:g sprats, all drench'd The clerk faid to her, in a heat, in mud,

What! sell my master's country seat, Jead cats, and turnip-tops, come tumbling Where he coines every week from town! down the flood.

He would not fell it for a crown.
Poh! fellow, keep not such a pother;

In hali an hour thou 'lt make another.

Says Nancy, I can make for miss HURCH-YARD OF CASTLEKNOCK. 1910.

A finer house ten times than this;

The Dean will give me willow-sticks,
THOEVER pleaseth to enquire
Why yonder steeple wants a spire,

And Joe my apron-full of bricks,
grey old fellow poet * Joe
The philosophic cause will show.
Once on a time a western blast

At leaf twelve inches overcaft,
Reckoning roof, weathercock, and all,
Which came with a prodigious fall;

And turning topsy-turvey round,
Light with its bottom on the ground;

1710 For, by the laws of gravitation,

THE rod was but a barmless wand, At fell into its proper station.

, This is the little strutting pile,

But, soon as e'er he laid it corun, You see just by the church-yard stile ;

'Twas a deyouring serpent grown. The walls in tumbling gave a knock;

Cur great magician, Hanset Sid, And thus the steeple got a Mock;

Reverse; what the prophet did:
From whence the neighbouring farmer calls His rel was borelt English wood,
The steeple, Knock; the vicar, 7 Walls.

That senseless in a corner stood,
Mr. Beaumont of Trim.

* Dr, Swift's curate at Laracer. Stella. Argideacon Wall, a correspondent of Swife's.

Mini er of Trim.
$ The waiting-woman,





Tüll, metamorphos'd by his gralp,

Sid's seeptre, full of juice, did rhont It grew an all-devouring aip;

In gollen boughs, and golden fruits Would hiss, and sting, and roll, and twist, And he, the dragon never sleeping, By the mere virtue of his fit ;

Guarded cach fair Hesperian pippin, But, when he laid it down, as quick

No hobby-borse, with gorgeous top, Resum'd the figure of a stick,

The deareit in Charles Mather's* Thop, So to her midnight-feaits the hag

Or glittering tin:el of May-sair, Rides on a broomstick for a nag,

Could with this rod of Sid compare. That, rais'd by magick of her breech,

Dear Sid, then, why wert thou fo mad O'er fea and land conveys the witch;

To break thy rod lile naughty lad! But with the morning-dawn re-umes

You fould have kiss'd it in your distress, The peaceful state of common brooms,

And then return'd it to your mi, refsi. They tell us something strange and odd Or made it a Newmarkett switch, About a certain magie rodi,

And not a rod for thy own breech, That, bending down its top, divines

But Gince old Sid has broken this,
Whene'er the foil has golden mines ;

His next may be a red in fils.
Where there are none, it stands ered,
Scorning to thew the least respect,
As ready was the wind of sid
To beni where golden mines were hid ;

In Scottish hills found precious ore, t
Where none e'er look'd for it before ;

LORD TREASURER OXFORD, 1710, And by a gentle borse divin'd, How well a cully's purse was lin'd:

TLAS, we read in ancient song, To a forlorn and broken rake

Was so exceeding tall and strong, Stood without motion, like a stake.

He bore the skies upon his back, The rod of Hermes was renown'd

Juft as a pedlar does his pack: For charins above and under ground;

But, as a pedlar overpress'd To seep could mortal eye-lids fx,

Unloads upon a stall to reft: And drive departed fouls to Styx.

Or, when he can no longer stand, That rod was just a type of Sid's,

Defires a friend to lend a hand; Which o'er a British senate's lids

So Atlas, left the ponderous spheres Could scatter opium ful as well,

Should link, and fall about his ears, And drive as many souls to hell.

Got Hercules to bear the pile, Sid's rod was slender, white, and tall,

That he might fit and relt a while. Which oft he usd to fill withal ;

Yet Hercules was not lo ftrorg, A fluice was faften'd to the hook,

Nor could have borne it halt so long. And many score of gudgeons took:

Great fiaicfmen are in this condition ; Yet 1 ill so happy was his fate,

And Atlas is a politician, He caught his jish, and sav'd his buit.

Arremier minister of state ; Sid's brethrea of the conjuring tribe

Alcides one of second rate. A circle with their red defcribe,

Suppose then Atas ne'er so wife; Which provés a magical redoubt

Yet, wir n the weight of kingdonis lies To keep mischicovous /pirits out.

Too long upon his fngle fhoulders,
Sid's rod was of a larger stride.

Sink down he muft, or find upholders,
And made a circle thrice as wide,
Where /: irit, thror g'd with liteous din,
And he stood th. re to take them in :
But, when th’inchanted ro' was broke,

They vanil'd in a stinking smoke,

Scene, The Royal ExcHANGE,
Achilles' fceptre was of wood,
Lj' e Sill's, but nothing near so good ;

That down from arcellors divine

TOW Tra:fimitted to the hero's line,

No hail defcends, and frosts can pinch ne The..c”, through a long defcent of kings,

more ; Camo an HLIR-LOOM, as Homer fogs.

Whil:t other girls confess the genial ipring, Ti nug' this description Ino's so big,

And laugh aloud, or amorous ditties ling, Tha: Prepire was a 'apless twig,

Secure from cold their lovely necks display,
W!ic'), from the fatal day, when frst

And throw each useless chating-dith away;
It let the forest wiere 'twas nurs’d,
As Horner tells us o'er and ner,

* Ar eminent teyman in Fleet-fireer. Nor lea', nor fruit, nor blofioin, bore.

+ Lord G.colphin is satirized by Mr. Pope for * Tie virgula divini, faxid to be attracled by jtrong attachment to the turf. See kis Merci minerals,

| Suppo,id to allude to the Union.

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Why fits my Phillis discontented here,,

The week flies round; and, when my profit's Por feels the turn of the revolving year?

known, Why on that brow dwell forrow and disiray, I hardly clar enough to change a crown. Vhere Loves were wont to sport, and Smiles to COR. Hard fate of virtue, thus to be distrest, play?

Thou fairest of thy trade, and far the best! Phillis. Ah, Corydon ! survey the 'Change As fruitmen's stalls the summer-market grace, around,

And ruddy peaches them; as frít in place Chrough all the 'Change no wretch like me is Plum-cake is seen o'er smaller pattry ware; found:

And ice on that; so Phillis does appear Nas! the day, when J, poor heedless maid, In play-houie and in park, above the rest N'as to your rooms in Lincoln's-Inn betray'd; Of belles mechanic, elegantly dreft. then how you twore, how many vows you PHIL. And yet Cr pundia, that conceited fair, made!

Amidit her toys, affects a saucy air, lc liftening Zephyrs, that o'erheard his love, Abd views me hourly with a scornful eye. Wat the foit accents to the gods above,

Cor. She might as well with bright Cleora vie. Alas! the day ; for (oh, eternal Thaine !)

Puil. With this large petticoat I strive in vain Isold you handkerchieis, and lost my fame. To hide my folly pait, and coming pain :

Cor. When I forget the favour you beftow'd, 'Tis now no secret ; fhe, anri fifty more,
led herrings Thall be fpawn'd in Tyburn Road, Observe the symptoms I had once before:
Fleet-Itreet transform d become a Howery green, A second babe at Wapping must be plac'd,
And mass be sung where operas are seen ; When I scarce bear the charges of the last.
The wealthy cit, and the St. James's beau,

Cor. What I could raise I fent; a pound of shall change their quarters, and their joys forego; plums, Stock-jobbing this to Jonathan's fall come, Five Millings, and a coral for his gums; At the Groom Porter's that play off his plum. To-morrow I intend him something more. Phil. But wbat to me does all that love Phil. I fent a frock and pair of shoes before. avail,

Cor. However, you shall home with me to. If, while I doze at home oʻer porter's ale,

night, Each night with wine and wenches you regale ? Forget your cares, and revel in delight. My live-long hours in anxious cares are past, I have in fore a pint or two of wine, And raging hunger lays my beauty waste. Some cracknels, and the remnant of a ching On templars spruce in vain I glances throw, And now on either fide, and all around, And with Mrill voice invite them as they go. The weighty shop-boards fall and bars resound; Expos'd in vain mny glossy ribbands thine, Cach ready fempstress slips her pattins on, And unregarded wave upon the twine. And ties her hood, preparing to be gone.


A P H,

Inscribed on a Marble Tablet, in Berkeley Church.

H. S. E.
Carolus Comes de Berkeley, Vicecomes Duriley,
Baro Berkeley, de Berkeley Caft. Mowbray, Segrave,

Et Bruce,' è Nobilissimo ordine Balnei Eques,
Vir ad genus quod fpeciat & Proavos usquequaque Nobilis,
Et longn, fi, quis alius Procerum ftemmate editus ;

Muniis etiam tain illustri stirpi dignis infignitus,
Siquidem à Gulielmo IIIo ad ordines fa derati Belgii

Ablegatus & Plenipotentiarius Extraordinarius
Rebus, non Britannie tantùm, fed totius fere Europe
(Tunc temporis præfertim arduis) per anios V. incubuit.

Quam felici diligentiâ, fde qnam intemerata,
Ex illo discas, Lecor, quod, fuperftite Patre,

In Mag, afum ordinem adscisci meruerit.
Fuit à fan&tioribus coniliis & Regi Guliel. & Annæ Reginæ,! |

E Proregibus Hibernir secundus,
Comitatuum Civitatumque Gloceft. & Brist. Dominus Locumtenens,

Surriæ & Glocet. Custos Rot. Urbis Gloceft, magnus
Senescallus, Arcis sancti de Briavell Caftellanus,

Guardianus Foreftæ de Dean.
Denique ad Turcaruin primum, deinde ad Roman. Imperatorcik

Cum Legatus Extraordinarius del gratus efet
Quo minus has etiam ornaret provincias

Obftitit adversa corporis valetudo.

Sed reftat adhuc, præ quo fordefcunt cætera, Honos verus, itabilis, et vel morti cedere nefcius,

Quod veritatem Evangulicam ferio amplexus;
Erga Deum pius, erga pauperes munificus,
Adverfùs omnes æquus & benevolus,

In Chrifto jam placidè obdormit

cum eodem olim regnaturus unà. Natus VIII° April. MDCXLIX. denatus XXIV° Septem. MDCCX. ætat, fuæ LXII.

IDAS, we are in story told,

Turn'd every thing he touch'd to geld:
He cap'd his beard; the pieces round
Glitter'd like spangles on the ground:
A codling, ere it went his lip in,
Would itrait become a golden pippin:
He call'd for drink; you saw him sup
Porable gold in golden cup:
His empty paunch that he migbt fill,
He sucked his vi&tuals through a quill :
Untouch'd it pass d between his grinders,
Or 't had been happy for gold-finders:
He cock'd his hai, you would have said
Mambrino's helm adorn'd his head :
Whene'er he chanc'd his hands to lay
On magazines of corn or hay,
Gold ready coin'd appear'd, instead
Of paltry provender and bread;
Hence by wife farmers we are told,
Old hay is equal to old gold ;
And hence a critic deep maintains,
We learo'd to weigh our geld by grains,

This fool had got a lucky hit;
And people fancy'd he had wit.
Two gods their fkill in musick try'd,
And both chofe Midas to decide :
He against Phưebus' harp decreed,
And gave it for Pan's oaten reed :
The god of wit, to thew his grudge,
Clapt sses' ears upon the judge;
A goodly pair ered and wide,
Which he could neither gild nor hide.
And now the virtue of his hands
Was loft among Paciolus' sands,
Against whose torrent while he swims,
'The golden scurt peels off his limbs :
Fame spreads the news, and people travel
From far to gather golder. gravel;
Midas, expos'd to all their jeers,
Had loft his art, and kept his ears.

THIS tale inclines the gentle reader
To think upon a certain leader ;
To whom, from Midas down, descends
'That virtue in the fingers' ends.
What else by ferquifites are meant,
By perjions, bribes, and three per cent.
By places and commissions sold,
And turning dung itself to gold?
By starving in the midst of store,
As t'other Midas did before?

None e'er did modern Midas choose,"
Subject or patron of his Musc,

But found him thus their merit fcan,
That Phæbus must give place to Pan:
He values not the poet's praise,
Nor will exchange his plumbs for bays.

alone rich mifers cail ;
And there's the jeft, for Pan is ALL.
Here English wits will be to teek,
Howe'er, 'is all one in the Greek.

Bef des, it plainly now appears
Our Midas too lath asses' ears;
Wliere every fool his mouth applies,
And whispers in a thousand lics :
Such gross delusions could not pass
Through any ears but of an ass.

But gold defiles with frequent touch :
There's nothing fouls the hand so much :
And scholars give it for the cause
Of British Midas' dirty paws;
Which while the fenate firove to scour,
They wash'd away the chemic power.

While he his ut moft strength apply'd, To swim against this popular ride, The goldm spoils flew off apace ; Here fell a fenhor, there a place; The torrent merciless imbibes Commiffions, perquifites, and bribes, By their own weight sunk to the bottom Much good may do them that have caught cm! And Midas now neglected stands, With asses ears, and dirty hands.



N Orator dismal of Norrirghamshire,

Who has forty years let out his conscience

to hire, Out of zeal for his country, and want of a place, Is come up, vi & armis, to break the Qucen's

peace. He has vamp'd an old speech; and the court, to

their sorrow, Shall hear him harangue against Prior to-morrow, When once he begins, he never will flinch, But repeats the same note a whole day, like a

Finch, I have heard all the speech repeated by Hoppy, And, “ Mistakes to prevent, I 've obtained a

copy." # The Lord Treasurer having hented a wisk ene evening that a ballad might be made on the Earl of Nottingham, this long was writion and printed The next morning.


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THEN a holy black Swede, ine for of Bchi,

With a sainti at his chin, and a fea! I ac WHEREAS, not withstanding, I am in great

his fob, pain,

Shall not fee one $ New-year's-day in that year, To hear we are making a peace without Spain ;

Then let old England make good chear : But, helt noble Senntörs, tis a great shame,

Windsor || and Bristow then Thall be
There should be a peace, while I'm Not-ins Join’d together in the Low-courireell.

Then it all the tall black Duventry Bird* *
The Duke fhcw'd me all his fine house; and the Speak againf peace right many a word;

And some shall admire his conying wit, From her closet brought out a full purse in her For many good grouts his tongue shall nit. clutches.

But, spight of the Harpy that crawls on all four, I talk'd of a peace, and they both gave a start;

There Thall be peace, pardie, and war no more. His grace swore by G-d, and her grace let afmt: But Englond inust cry alack and well-a-day, My long old-fushiond pocket was presently cramm’d; If the juick be taken from the dead-sea. And sooner than vote for a peace I'll be damn'd. And, dear Englord, if aught I understond, But fonte will cry Turn-coat, and rip up old

Beware of Carrots fromit Northumberlonc'. ftories,

Carrots sown Tyrret a decp root may get, How I always pretended to be for the Tories.

If so be they are in Somer fer : I answer; the Tories were in my good graces,

Their sf Genings murk thou ; for I have been Till all my relations were put into places :

told, Eut ftill I'm in principle ever the faine,

They filline when young, and foison when old. And will quit my best friends, while I'm Not

Root out these Carrots, Othou,||! whose name in-game.

Is backwards and forwards always the same; When I and some others subscribed our names

And keep close to thee always that name, To a plot for expelling my master King James ; Which backwards and forwards is almost the I withdrew my subscription by help of a blot,

fame. And so might discover or gain by the plot :

And Engiond, wouldst thou be happy still, I had my advantage, and itood at defance,

Bury those Carrots under a Hill(*). For Daniel was got from the den of the lions :

* It is said that Queen Anne had nominated Dr. I came in without danger, and was I to blame?

Swift so an English bi poprick; which was opposed For, rather than harg, I would be Not-ir-game. I swore to the Queen, that the Prince of Ha- of Somerset, who had prevailed or his grace to go

by Dr. Shars, archbishop of York, and the duchefo

with her to the queen 10 lay afide the nomirationi, During her sacred life would never come over: which her Majesty refused; but the duchess falling I made use of a trope; that “ an heir to invite,

on her knees, and sewing the above prophecy to her " Was like keeping her monument always in Maje'y, iné bifhoprick was given to another. See fight.”

p. 100. But, when I thouglit proper, I alter'd my note ;

+ Dr. Fehn Robinson, bishop of Bristol, one of Ard in her own hearing I boldly did vote,

the plenipotentiaries of Utrechi. That her Majesty stood in grcat need of a Tutor, He was dear of Wirdser, and lord provy-Jeal. Ardmut have an old or a young Coadjutor :

Ś The New Stile (which was not used in CrearFor why; I would fain have put all in a Hame, Britain and Ireland till 1752) was then observed E: cause, for some reasons, I was Not-in-game.

in most parts of Europe. The bishop fet exi from Now my new beneful?ors have brought me aboui, England the latter end of December, O. S.; and, on And I'll vote against Peace, with Spain, or with his arrival at Utrecht, by she variation of the ftile, Though the Court gives my rephews, and brothers,

he found January somewhat advanced.

!! Ailuding to the dearery and bishoprick being and cousins, Andall my whole family, places by dozens;

possessed by the same person, then at Utrecho.

** Earl of Nottingham, Yet, since I know where a full-purse 'nay be ** The duchess of Somer fel. found,

#f Themas Thynne, of Longleate, esq; a gentle And hardly pay eighteen-pence tax in the pound; Since the Tories have thus disappointed my after the death of her first husband, Henry Caver

man of very great ciase, mrried ihe above lady hopes, And will neither regard my hgures nor tropes;

disk earl of Ogle, only for so Henry duke of Newa I'll speech against peace while Difmal's my name,

cajile, to whom she had been betrothed in her infancy,

SS Count Koningsmark,
And be a trät Whig, while I am No-in-game, Jill Anna,

19 Majam.
(*) Lady Mufhan's maiden name mai Hill.


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