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So Mary got me to bed, and cover'd me up, The devil take me! said she (blessing herself) if
ever I iaw't ! However, the stole away my garters, that I might So the roar'd like a Bedlam, as though I had do myself no harn.
calp'd ber all to naught. % I tumbled aud tois'd all night, as you may ve So you know, what could I say to her any ry well think,
more? But hardly ever set my eyes together, or fept a I e'er leit her, and came away as wise as I was
before. E I was a-drean'd, methought, that we not
Well; but then they would have had me gone to aud kvarc'i'd the folks round,
the currirg man! And in a crroer of lir. Dules's * box, ty'd in a No, said I, 'is the same thing, the chaplain will rag, the morty was found.
be here anon. su nesi mörring we told Whittle f, and he tell So the chaplain* caine in. Now the servants say a iweari:g :
he is my sweetheart, Then my s'une Wadgar came ; and she, you Because he 's always in my chamber, and I alknow, is thick of hearios,
ways take his part. Dame, said I, as lour a: Flould bawl, do you So, as the devil would have it, before I was aware, row what a lois Llave had ?
out I blunder'd, Nay, faid she, my Lord Clway's g folks are a! Parlor, said I, can you cast a nativity, when a
body plunderd ? For my Lord Dromedary|| comes a Tuesday (Now, you must know, he hates to be call'd without fail.
farfon like the devil!) Pugh! faid I, but that 's not the business that I Truly, says he, Mrs. Nab, it might become you ail.
to be more civil : Says Cary**, says be, I have been a fervant this. If your money be gone, as a learned divine says, five and twenty years, come spring,
d'ye see, And in all the places I liv'd I never heard of You are no text for my handling : fo take that
such a thing. Yes, says the fiewardtt, I remember, when II was never taken for a conjurer before, I'd have was at my Lady Shrew Bury'i,
you to know. Such a thing as this happen' just about the time Lord! said I, do't be angry, I am sure I never of yooseberries..
thought you so ; So I went to the party fufpected, and I found her | You know I honour the cloth; I design to be a full of grief,
parson's wife; (Now, you inuit know, of all things in the world, I never took one in your coat for a conjurer in all
I hate a thief.) | However, I am refolv'd to brir.g the discourse with that he twisted his girdle at me like a rope, Nily about :
as who should say, Mrs. Dukes, faid !, here is an ugly accident has Now you may go hang yourself for me! and so
happer's out: Tis not that I vaiue the money three kips of a Well : I thought I should have fwoon'd. Lord!
said I, what shall I do? But the thing I fand upon is the credit of the I have lost my money, and shall lose my true love houit.
too! 'Tis true, seven pounds, four shillings, and fix Then my Lord callid mc : Harry*, said my' 12.ce, makes a great hele inny wages :
Lord, don't cry ; Lerid s, as they say, service is no inheritance in I'll give you something towards thy loss; and,
says niy Lady, so will I. Sow, Mrs. Du'es, you know, and cvery body Oh! but, said I, what is, after all, the chaplain undertards,
won't come to That though 'is hard to judge, yet movey can't For that, he said, (an't please your Excellencies) g without hands.
I must petition you.
The prizinisies tenderly confider'd, I defire your * Mife to one of the footwe".
Excellencies protection, * Ewrl of Der keley's I'n'ei.
And that I may have a share in next Sunday's
colication; 1 T. oid deuf housekeeper.
And, over and above, that I may have your Galwiy.
Excellencies letter, \\ Tie Eirl of Drogheda, cuno, ceithire Pri- With an order for the chaplain aforesaid, or, in
stead of him, a better : mate, 1948 16 fucceed the two Earis. ** Clerk of the hilcien.
* Dr. Swift. itt Ferris.
* A cant word of Lord and Lady B. to Mrs. An usual frying of hers.
th se ages.
And then your poor feritienit, both night and
day, Or the chaplain (for 'tis his trade), as in duty
bound, mall ever pray.
A B A L L A D
GAME OF TRAFFIC. Written at the Castle of Dublin, 1699.
Motordt; to find out who must deal,
Delivers cards about,
To find the Doctor out.
And seem'd to knit his brow :
But h’ thinks upon Jack How*. My Lady, though she is no player,
Some bungling partner takes,
Takes fnuff, and holds the ila kes.
For pair-royal- and fequents ;
The castle seldom frequents. Quoth Herries, fairly putting cases,
I'd won it on my words
And could pick up a third.
On Sundays to be fine in,
'Twill juf new-dye the lining. « With these is Parfir Cilt,
« Not knowi.g how to frend bis time, 6 Does make a wretched kit,,
« To deafon them with puns and rhyme.”
Then all in the place,
He left a void space, And so weit to bed in a desperate cale : When behold the next morning a wonderful ril
dle ! He found it was strangely fül'd up in the rid.
dle. Cho. Let conuring critics then think schat line
For he wisely coní der'd it mult be a sprite ; That he came through the key-bole, or in allen
casement; And it needs must be one that could both rez and write :
Yet he did not know
If it were friend or foe,
In making a ballad, but was at a stand :
pains ; When he found a new help from invifil: ha.:d.
Then, good Doctor Swifi,
Pay thanks for the gift;
THE DISCOVERY. THEN wife Lord Birkeley frit came heres
A B A L L A D
Nor thought to find so great a peer
Ere a week past committing blunders.
tin; But was forly put to't in the midlt of a verse,
Because he could f:d no word to come pat in :
Lady Betty Berkeley, fooling the precering Terle in the author's room unfinipel, write under them the concluding fianza ; which give occafiem to this tallad, written by the author in a counterfeit hand, as if a third person had done
When folks came thick to make their couri, Out fiipt a mystery of fiate,
To give tee town and country sport. Now enters Buih with new ftate airs,
His lordinip's premier minifter;
Is held as needfrill as his † clyfter.
* Buff by some undernard inliruation, ebevices the post of secretary; which had been promifen in Swift.
† Always taken before my Lord wer: 10 Csizma
With bead reclining on his shoulder,
He deals and hears mysterious chat, While every iguorant beholder
Alks of his neighbour, Who is that? With this he put up to my lord,
The courtiera kept their distance due, He twitch'd liis neeve, and tole a word;
Then to a corner both withdrew.
Whispering in junto most profound;
While all the reft itood gaping round,
Or forward face and car acute,
To over-hear the grand dispute :
Or from Whitehall fome new express,
For sure (thought he) it can't be less. My lord, said Buth, a friend and I,
Disguis:d in two old thread-bare coats, Ere morning's dawn, stole out to spy
How markets went for hay and oats. With that he draws two handfuls out,
The one was oats, the other hay; Puts this to 's excellency's snout,
And begs he would the other weighi, My lord seems plea:'d, but still directs
By all means to bring down the rates ; Then, with a congee circumflex,
Bush, smiling round on all, retreats. Our listener food a while confus'd,
But, gathering spirits, wisely ran for 't, Enrag'd to see the world abus d
By two such whispering kings of Brentford,
So, when a weazel you torment,
And now, the ladies all are bent
The ladies vanish in the fmother,
THE PROBLEM, " THAT MY LORD BERKELEY STINKS, WHEN
HE IS IN LOVE."
| See “ The Rehearsal.”
1706. Pliny, Nat. Hif, lib, x. c. 67. 1.5. xxix. C. 4. S Mastiff Dogs in inodern phrase are
As Pyes and Daws are often ity!"
Bestow'd as hieroglyphics fit
Firít, then, our author has defined
So, when the war has rais'il a storm,
Farther, we are by Pliny told,
So have I seen a batter'd beau,
EIRL OF FETERBOROW, WHO COMMASDED ILE BRITISH FORCES IN
The Chriftian world; his carls proclaim, And prints are crouded with his name.
la journies he oufrides the post, Sit: up till mid: ig'ıt with his luc!, Talls politicks, and gives the toait ;
Kuows every prince in Furope's tace, Flie: like a fquib from place to place, Aad travels not, but runs a race.
From Pari, gazette à-la-malih,
A medienger cones all a-reek,
Next day the pott-boy wiods his horn,
Morganto gallops on'alone ;
His body active as his mind,
A fileton in outward figure,
So wonderful his expedition,
Shines in all climates like a fiar;
Ecroic actions early bred in ;
ON THE UNION. The Queen has lately boat a part,
Of her ENTIRELY-EAGISH* heart;
up with roses.
* The mette er: Queen Anne's coronation medal.
Which, just like ours, new rigg'd and mann'd,
ON MRS. BIDDY FLOYD. Or, The RECEIPT to form a BEAUTY*. THEN Cupid did his gra:dfre Jove intreat
V To form foire Beauty by a new receipt, Jove feat, and found far in a country-leene Truth, inaocence, good-nature, look f-rene : Froon which ingredients first the dextrous boy Pick'd the demure, the aukward did the coy. The Graces from top court did next provide Breading, and wit, and air, and decent pride : These Venus cleans from every spurious grain Of nice, coquet, a rectori, port, and vain. Jove mix'd up a'l, and his best ciay einploy'd; Then called the bappy Composition Floy!.
Hear my request, the virgin said;
Let which I please of all the Nine Attend, where'er I want their aid,
Obey my call, and only mine. By vow oblig'd, by passion led,
The god could not refuse her prayer : Howay'i his wreatlı tbrice o'er her head,
Thrice mutter'd something to the air. And now he thought to seize his due :
But the the charm already tried, Thalia heard the call, and flew
To wait at bright Aro-lia's side, On sight of this cele!tial prude,
Apollo thought it vain to ftay; Nor in her presence durft be rude ;
But inade his leg and went away. He hop'd to ind some lucky hour,
When on their Queen the Muses wait ; But Pallas owns Ardelia's power ;
For vows divine are kept by Fate. Then, full of rage, Apollo spoke :
Deceitful Nymph ! I see thy art ;
I'll disappoint its nobler part.
And be thou negligent of fame ;
May'lt thou despise a poet's name! Of modeft poets thou be first;
"To filent inades repeat thy verse, Till Fame and Echo alınost burst,
Yet hardly dare one line rehearse. And last, my vengeance to complete,
May' It thou defcend to take renown, Prevail'd on by the thing you hate,
A Whig ! and one that wears a gownt
Hon. Mrs. Finch,
Nume of Ardelia.
Attending on a royal dame.
Then lighted from his glittering coach;
Before he durit the nymph approach. Under those facred leaves, secure
From common lightning of the kies,
The flahes of Ard lid eve:
Oi that brigt god who iar.is invoke,
Ad gueir'd ais buluess ere he spoke. H., in the old celestial cait,
Confef3'd his famı', and ivore by Styx, Wbate'er she would deiire, to gra ilma
But wife Ardelia kaew his tricks, Ovid had warn'J her, to beware
Of strolling gods, winde usual trade is, Under pr tence of taking air,
To pick up sublunary ladies. Howe'er, she gave no tiat denial,
A haviig inalice in her heart'; And was refolu'd upon a trial,
To cheat the god in bis own art.
* Ar eleganı Lalin version of this little poem is in the fixth volume of Drycker's Miscellanies.
VANBRUGH's HOUSE, Built from the Ruins of Whitehall,
And poets their own veries (ung,
But, to their own or landlord's cost,
* See the note p. 273