CHINA PLATES.

LETTER I.

"Why hath a man two eyes? Truly, that he may see with the one, while the other winks."

How true is the saying that the junks of the Barbarians have no eyes, and therefore, see not. For many years have they been carrying on an illicit trade, and, emboldened by impunity, have fearlessly spread their sails, and pushed on in their wicked course, throwing overboard the compass of Prudence, and placing their helms in the hands of Indiscretion. The consequence is, they have run upon a shoal, and are likely to founder, and-no mistake! Like many more of my brothers who suffered by their black iniquity, I was tempted to indulge in secretly smoking the forbidden drug, but the edict of the Brother of the Moon has opened my drooping eyelids, and let in the daylight of truth. Yes! I have indignantly cast away my pipe-for there is no longer any opium to supply it!

The eyeless junks of the more blind Barbarians are all seized; and there is, consequently, such a dust raised in Xantung that the glorious rays of the sun himself can hardly penetrate it. They loudly declare that they were led into this awful crime against the wellbeing of the subjects of the Celestial Empire at the instigation, and by the facilities offered to the illegal traffic by the officers in power. Miserable Barbarians! to endeavour to palliate their own misdemeanours by casting reflections upon the integrity of our officials; who, if they did sometimes wink, was it not occasioned by the som niferous merchandize these barbarians brought into port? Dare they accuse the honest men of taking a bribe? Never! unless, indeed, it were of such a weight that it completely bore down all human opposition. For, as the poet saith, "are not all men's good and evil actions like a pair of scales," wherein a weight being cast by malice, maketh the good rise, and the evil preponderate, and vice versâ? for what mortal can struggle against the decrees of Fate? It appears to my simple mind, too, perfectly correct that they should squeeze the Barbarians: nay, morally just that they should levy contributions on them as a fine for their wickedness! Nay, is not evil frequently done that good may come of it? Doth not my beloved LEW-SHE herself, the most careful of wives, waste cheese in making toasted baits for the mice, that she may thereby destroy the destroyers? And, is not this small sinfulness of waste outweighed by the great good of saving? And yet--would you believe it ?— they kick. Now, can anything be a greater proof of folly than for men to kick who have not a leg to stand on ?-ridiculous!

"Be composed, though the waves roll upwards to the sky, there is a middle` course; pursue it, and your bark will glide gently on!"

EVERY virtue under the sun flourishes and ripens in the Celestial Empire.

Surely the present bobbery with these white-headed Barbarians will serve our literati for a new volume of the KwE-KOO KE

KWAN.* What morals will they draw from their iniquitous proceedings in this affair? Dearest SUNG KIN, I have not the power of depicting in words half the interest which envelopes the absorbing subject on which I write. My reed, in truth, is like a delusive moonbeam in my fingers; and, when I read over what I have written—lo! my tablets seem only to contain the fleshless skeletons of the living figures wherewith my mind is charged. But, though I possess neither the pen nor the imagination of TSZE-KEEN,† I have truth, which, like the purest gold, is still valuable, though unfashioned by the hands of the skilful. Know, SUNG-KIN, our Father, the Emperor, whose actions are the offspring of good counsel and far-seeing wisdom, has commanded the seizure of the whole of the pernicious drug contained in the vessels of the offending Barbarians; and worth about three millions of tales.

He has, moreover, in his unbounded clemency, spared their lives, upon condition they shall never again offend against his laws,those unchangeable laws, which are inscribed in letters of gold by equity and justice in the great book.

The man Elliott, having no fear in his eyes of the tremendous arm of the Brother of the Sun, instead of humbly striking his forehead in the dust, presumes to murmur at the decree, and basely defends his countrymen. The Commissioner LIN, bearing the bright lantern of the Emperor's power in his hand, manfully wrestles with the rebellious spirit, sending forth proclamation upon proclamation, and writing after writing, twice as long as Elliott's, and yet the shallow man will not hear reason; proving the truth of the saying, that it is as difficult to convince a fool as it is to fill a sieve with water.

This night he has taken himself away, and gone on board a vessel of his country, taking with him many and many, and there he hovers about, uncertain what to do; like a dog which hath been beaten, and is afraid, and yet, with lingering look and pendent tail, wishes to return to the spot where he hath been fed by the hands of kindness since the day he was pupped! The heart of the savage is in his breast, but he hath no knife! What ridiculous contention is this! -a bright ray of the Emperor (which is LIN) against the darkness of this starless night (which is Elliott)!-an imperial gong to an infant's tom-tom! In the mean time, the trouble of the peaceful and well ordered inhabitants of Xantung is great; they fear the rashness into which his folly may lead him, and with anxious eyes they follow his movements, well knowing that they shall be compelled to resist any outbreak, and reasonably fearing they may suffer; for when one bowl striketh another, one or both are likely to be cracked by the collision!

Trade, too, is at a stand-still, and the merchants complain in a small voice; for if the Barbarians should make war instead of tea, they know there is no longer any chance of their making money.

Where is that great King EAST-INDIA-COMPANY, whose words flowed from the fountain of truth, and whose gold and silver were never weighed even by the doubtful, such implicit faith did they place in his honour and integrity! There were no troubles during his reign; but, alas! the Barbarians have deposed him ;-yes, the

*Ancient and Modern Wonderful Tales.

+ Tsze-Keen possessed an extraordinary talent for writing themes and essays.

fools have sawed away the prop of their house, and the roof falls in and crushes them.

I here snap the thread of my communication, and will resume it again should anything occur worthy the reading of my faithful SUNGKIN.

At present there is a lull, a heaviness in the atmosphere, which I much fear portendeth a storm.

LETTER III.

CHIN-SAN.

"The sound of the kettle-drum urges the boatmen to row." KWAN-FOOTSZE* has buckled on his shield and drawn his scimitar. Bold as the five-clawed dragon, he has marched from the land to the sea, and put his foot in it!

What hand can restrain the lion in his wrath when his eyes kindle like the flame of a furnace, and his mane bristles like a field of bamboos?

The great guns of the Barbarians have awakened the slumbering tranquillity of our peaceful shores, and the courageous spirits of hundreds of our beloved citizens have flitted away in the volumes of rolling smoke!

The hearts of our women, even, are shrunk up to the size of stale and wrinkled dates with terror and dismay!

Reams of paper have been consumed in offerings to the departed heroes.t

And But oh! HAN-YUH! the clear current of my thoughts is become so perturbed and muddy that I know not what I do, and am verily leading the pig by the tail instead of the snout-and beginning at the wrong end of my doleful history.

Learn, then, O! HAN-YUH, and communicate the sad tidings to all our loving kindred in CHOW-CHOw, that yesterday at the dawn of day, our noble admiral, who has descended in a direct line, without knots or twistings, or intermixture of baser blood, for two thousand years, from a fruitful branch of the house of KAN-TUN-TSWEN, placed his proud foot on the deck of his war-vessel, which undulated in the waters like a trained horse curvetting beneath its rider, and gave a signal to the whole fleet to precede him, that his unwinking eyes might view their conduct in the incomparable project formed in his sublime brains!

No sooner were his commands issued than a thousand oars divided the yielding waters, and they flew swiftly forth like so many whis tling arrows loosed from the twanging bow-string.

Already had our undaunted and invincible war-men surrounded the big ships of the foe, and fired their blinding charges of charcoal powder into the round eyes of the tail-less Barbarians. Already had they climbed the lofty sides of these sea-monsters, and with their gleaming blades severed a thousand heads from their respective bodies.

The God of War.

On all occasions of worshipping departed spirits, paper offerings are invariably made use of, and generally accompanied with various articles, such as flesh, fowls, wine, &c. At funerals it is customary to burn paper representations of men, women, houses, sedan chairs, &c. and to pass them into the invisible state for the use of the departed.

Already had they blown into a thousand fragments those floating castles, and scattered them like dust before the wind.

Already, I say, Oh! HAN-YUH, had they performed these feats of all-conquering valour-in imagination! when, approaching the slumbering vessels of the enemy, the Barbarians were seized with such a panic, that they accidentally, in their mortal terror, let off several of their great guns! and bang! bang! rattle! rattle! they roared and boomed along the calm surface of the waters with the din and clamour of a thousand gongs!-and the next moment, lo! several of the foremost of our junks, quite unprepared for the unforeseen consequences of the Barbarians' dismay, were pierced and battered, and quick! dived into the sea like so many decoy-ducks!

Merciful as he is valiant, our nobly-descended admiral immediately commanded the remaining junks-not to remain,-anxious to prevent a greater effusion of blood. For, by the horse of FUH! had he persisted in pursuing his exalted project, it is impossible to say what might have been the result; for our brave fellow-citizens were to a man rendered so desperate, that they lost all command of themselves and their oars, and pulled for the shore, when they intended, no doubt, to run down the opposing craft! It certainly appeared, however, to the penetration of a cool observer, that the Barbarians' craft had got the better of our cunning!

Let this be as it may, the sight of so many of our countrymen dropping so suddenly into a watery grave was as distressing as if a nail had entered one's eye! May Lung* cherish their brave spirits! If they are now doomed to wander at the bottom of the sea, it is at least plucking some of the thorns from the poignancy of our sorrow to know that, their vessels having gone with them, they will not starve for the want of salt JUNK!

Thus, alas!" the bloom of the flower perishes in the falling shower, and the grass nipped by the hoar-frost loses its verdant hue !"