tells me these things are fo, I will infift on his carrying me with him to one of those fuperlatively- polite affemblies: for if I don't frequent the most fashionable circles, I fhall be thought a meer Ignoramus, and no body will read my papers. In the mean time, let me earnestly perfuade my fair country women, to renember that the majority of those who make an elegant appearance when they are cover'd with a becoming drapery, would be downright fcarecrows without it. I will allow that there are a great many Venus's about Town, but I cannot allow that a Venus of Medicis is to be met with every day.

Soon after I received the abovementioned let ter, a stiff, tall, upright figure, whom my landlady introduced to me, prefented the following one with looks of importance, bowed very profoundly, and then left the room without uttering a fyllable, as much like a stake as he enter'd it,

SIR,

I am a grown gentleman, and have just finished my studies under the tuition of the renowned Mr. NH-t, whofe induftry is equal to his abilities, and whofe excellent aca

demy in Effex-fireet, wants not to be flourishingly recommended for its utility by my pen, becaufe it has already been fufficiently celebrated by his own. But to the point I have composed a work, for the benefit of my countrymen and country women, which will be allowed, I flatter myfelf, by all perfons of tafle and difcernment, to be far the compleatest thing of the kind, that ever came from the prefs.-It is entitled the Analyfis of Politeness, and will, though no bigger than a Goldsmith's Almanack, contain the whole duty of man and of woman too. I intend, for fome private reafons, to print it by fubfcription, though I doubt not but that its own intrinfic merit would render it famous, not only in this little island, but in all civilized nations under the fun; nay, the most barbarous ones, I am fanguine enough to believe, will be polished by the perufal of my book, which is calculated for all capacities. The fubfcription-price will be ten guineas, and Conditions will be publish'd at large, as foon as I find a difpófition in the town to encourage fo useful a work. As for the Price, I hope your readers will not start at it, and think my demands are too extravagant, for I can venture to affure them, that if they fubfcribe to this work, they never need fubfcribe to any other. And

And who would not chufe to have a compleat library in so narrow a compass, at so small an expence? By communicating this fcheme to the public, and warmly interefting yourself in its behalf, you will more than oblige,

Your very obfequous fervant,

H. N.

N. B. If you can get off a dozen books for me, you fhall have the thirteenth gratis.

NUMB V. Saturday, April 10, 1756.

Hominem Pagina nostra sapit.

MART.

Men and their manners to defcribe, we try.

HAD a little business to tranfa&t t'other day

in 'Change Alley, where I accidentally met with Sam Olive, an old accquaintance, who grafp'd my hand with a great deal of friendliness, and infifted on my going home to dine with him. Sam is an honest Cock, plain, hearty, and worth money, which he has acquired by flicking clofe to his shop, and taking care of the main Chance, C 4

and

and not leaving his bufinefs to be look'd after by journeymen, and apprentices.

I was conducted up ftairs into his diningroom, in which I found the cloth laid, and Mrs. Olive and Mifs ready to receive him.-—“So, fo "wife, faid he, what is the veal roasted enough? "I have brought my old friend Mr. BABBLE

to foul a plate with us." "Lard, cried she, I

am extremely glad to fee Mr. BABBLE, but I "declare I am in fuch a pickle- but indeed I "did not expect fuch good company - I have "been fo bufy all this morning in getting my "plate weigh'd." Well well, faid he, you

"might have spared yourself that trouble, for I"told you before I fhould part with all that was "unneceffary, and keep only a few spoons, and "the tankard, which you know, continued he « turning to me, one cannot well do without." "I don't know what you call neceffary Mr. "Olive, faid the warmly, but for my part, I<don't fee any individual thing we can spare."No, faid he, why then I'll tell you, my dear, "what you can spare: there's the great falver, "the large filver cup and cover, the two mugs, the coffee pot, the O law. Papa, (faid Mifs,

❝ a young lady about fifteen)" fure you won't

"think of felling the coffee pot

"No no, "child, nor any thing elfe, faid the mother, "why the cup you know was left for Tommy by " his grandmama, when we are dead and gone. "And I defign to change the old fashioned falver "for a handfome tea-waiter.-Aye, aye, you may "defign what you will, faid my friend Sam, but "I defign no fuch thing-what shall I keep a parcel of useless plate only to pay five fhillings a year for it very pretty indeed no no, it "fhall all go, as I'm a living man, if there (c were ten times as much. I pay taxes enough "already I think-faith- 'tis very lucky we have

no more -You must know, continued he, addreffing himself to me," my wife there has "been teazing me above this half year for a filver. "tea-kettle and lamp; and I was just going to be"fpeak them when this bill was firft brought into "the house."-Well, and why fhould you not be"fpeak them now, faid fhe, indeed I can't bear"to think of felling my plate: I am ashamed "to hear you talk fo; but you love to make "yourself look little and mean." Little and "mean, cried he; aye aye, I fhall look both "little and mean enough, when I shut up shop, "which must be the cafe, if taxes increase thus upon us. us. I wonder what a plague the go