made Riot, laugh vehemently. "I fuppofe, Sir, faid he fneeringly, Mrs. Betty ferves you in all Capacities. A handy Girl, by Jupiter, is mighty convenient: but half of thofe Wenches, pox take them, want to be waited on themfelves. But whenever I find fuch fort of Cattle giving themfelves Airs, I generally kick them out of the Room, and by that means have a fresh Girl twice a Week."-"O law, faid Dicky, I could not bear a ftrange Perfon about me: I fhould feel fo awkward with a Woman I had not been used to.' Oons, Sir, cried Riot, why do you lie with the fame Woman every Night ?" "--O law, O dear, faid Dicky, you are mistaken indeed I keep my 'Maid only to wait on me, and dress me to help 'me to ftarch my Linen, and tuck me up at Night. Fellows are fo robuft I can't bear them." The Devil take your Delicacy, cried Riot, but comehere is King George's health in a Brimmer. - Indeed Sir, cried Dyelip, I can't poffibly swallow fuch an ocean of Liquor.- What, refufe his Majefty's health, cried Riot-Fire and FuriesWhy then, cried the Beau, trembling like,an afpen leaf, let me dafh it with a little Water -Water, Sir? drink the King's health in Water, cried Toby, flat Treafon by Jupiter - But you are fome fneaking half starved Jacobite, or else you would not have proposed fuch an affront - But let me fee you gulph it down directly, or I'll dash you to the Devil.-The frighted Popinjay vowed, that that if he complied he fhould not exift to take another draught, because he was as fick as Death. นเ Why then, cried his Tormentor, you may as well die by Poifon as by the Sword, for I swear I will fuffer no Man to efcape the point of mine, who refufes to drink the King's health as he ought to do. Dicky then applied the Glafs to his Lips, fipped a little, and fet it down: while Riot flood over, him with his drawn Sword, and Tom rolled from fide to fide convulfed with Laughter.-With many heaves and wry faces, Dicky at last got to the bottom, and as foon as he had recovered himfelf from the immenfe fatigue, begg'd Mr. Pleafant to fend for a Chair, declaring he never drank any thing with his Meals, but Milk, Water, or lukewarm weak Green Tea. This Declaration increased Tom's Convulfions, and Toby's Choler, who told him, with a volley of Oaths, that he was the moft obftinate Milk-fop he ever met with; that kicking was too good a punishment for him, and that he deferved to be toft in a Blanket.As Toby fquinted at me, when he concluded his Speech, I followed Mr. Dyelip down stairs, not chufing, for the fake of being thought a devilifh clever fellow, to be converted into a Corpfe. NUMB. i NUMB. XXXI. Saturday, October 9, 1756. SPEC Ride fi fapis. Laugh if you are wife. PECTACLES, I humbly conceive, were riginally intended by the fagacious Inventor of them, to aid and affift thofe Eyes which might be weakened and rendered useless by Sickness or by Age, by Nature, or by unexpected Misfortunes. To these restrictions they were for many Years confined, but as the veteran Spectacles were found, in procefs of time, to be inconfiftent with the fofter texture of modern Nofes, a fort of demi-fpectacle or fingle Perspective was invented, which has not the leaft communication with that important Feature, and is made ufe of indifcriminately by those whose Eyes stand in need of optical auxiliaries, and those who can enjoy the pleasures of Sight without them. If the Mother of young Lippus could be permitted to revifit this World, and fee her darling Boy ogling at the Opera-House, and other public Places, and feemingly very attentive to every object within the ken of his Glafs, would the not be ready to exclaim in this manner?" Alafs, my Son, what dreaatul M dreadful calamity has deprived Thee of perfect Sight? little would fhe imagine, poor Woman, that his Eyes are still poffeft of the fame acuteness as ever, and that on this very account the Glafs which he uses, instead of exhibiting the Object gazed at more distinctly to his View, really obftructs his Sight, and renders every thing towards which it is directed abfolutely imperceptible. It gives him, however, an opportunity to difplay the Sparkler on his Finger, and to wriggle his Body into a thousand enchanting Attitudes, whilft he reconnoitres the Company. I doubt not but my very polite Readers have frequently noticed this fluttering purblind Youth in different Parts of the Town. At the Play-Houfe he generally takes his Stand upon the Stage, or in the Side-Boxes. Sometimes, indeed, I have recognized his pretty Phiz in that vulgar Place the Two-filling Gallery, but then he was incog; and confequently neither fhewed his Brilliant, nor his Perspective. Dick Secondfight (a young Templar of my Acquaintance) has a pair of fuch excellent Eyes, that he is able to read the fmalleft Print without the affiftance of any optical Inftrument; nay he can even decypher the almoft-indecypherable Opinions of Counfellor, at a confiderable Distance. I have catched him fometimes hard at his ftudies by Moon-light, when he has been at a lofs co procure a Candle.--Yet, follow this quickfighted fighted Gentleman to George's, and you will be aftonished; for as foon as he takes up a Paper his Sight fails him his demi-fpectacleis immediately unfheathed and elevated, by the help of which, my Friend Richard is just able, after a great deal of poring and attention, to take in all the parts of a political Paragraph. It is the fupreme Pride of the Spaniards (to whom I believe we are primarily indebted for this ufeful Implement) to have received from their prudent Ancestors a certain form and method in their Habit, and every thing elfe, which is perfectly accommodated to their Climate and their Humour. As the Mode of Drefs, therefore, has continued invariably the fame in that Country, I hall take the liberty to infert an Account of Spectacle Wearing, as it prevailed among its Inhabitants in the Year 1722. "The first time I waited on the Princess of "Monteleon, (fays my Hiftorian) I was surprized "to fee fo many young Ladies with great Specta"cles on their Nofes: but what appeared moft "unaccountable was, that they, made no use of "them where they were really necessary. They <6 only converfed together, while they had them on. I was confounded at the fight, and im86 parted my fentiments to the Marchionefs de la "Rafa. She fmiled at my Embarrasment, and told me that the Intention of wearing them. was to give an Air of Gravity to the Counte 66 M 2 nance, |