I spend my time in making sermons,
Or writing libels on the Germans,
Or murmuring at Whigs' preferments.
III.
But when I would find rhyme for Rochfort,
And look in English, French, and Scotch, for't,
At last I'm fairly forc'd to botch for❜t.
Bid Lady Betty recollect her,
And tell who was it could direct her
To draw the face of such a spectre.
I must confess that as to me, Sirs,
Tho' I ne'er saw her hold the scissars,
I now could safely swear it is her's.
'Tis true no nose could come in better;
'Tis a vast subject stuff'd with matter,
Which all may handle, none can flatter.
Take courage, Dan, this plainly shows
That not the wisest mortal knows
What fortune may befal his nose.
Shew me the brightest Irish toast
Who from her lover e'er could boast
Above a song or two at most;
For thee three poets now are drudging all,
To praise the cheeks, chin, nose, the bridge, and all, Both of the Picture and original.
Thy nose's length and fame extend
So far, dear Dan! that ev'ry friend
Tries who shall have it by the end.
And future poets, as they rise,
Shall read with envy and surprise,
Thy nose outshining Celia's eyes.
My verse is little better you'll find than my face is;
A word to the wise, ut pictura poesis.
THREE merry lads, with envy stung,
Because Dan's face is better hung,
Combin'd in verse to rhyme it down,
And in its place set up their own,
As if they'd run it down much better
By number of their feet in metre,
Or that its reddid cause their spite,
Which made them draw in black and white.
Be that as 'twill, this is most true,
They were inspir'd by what they drew.
Let then such critics know, my face
Gives them their comeliness and grace,
Whilst ev'ry line of face does bring
A line of grace to what they sing.
But yet, methinks, tho' with disgrace
Both to the Picture and the face,
I name the men who do rehearse
The story of the Picture-farce.
The 'squire in French as hard as stone,
Or strong as rock, that's all as one,
On face on cards is very brisk, Sirs,
Because on them you play at whist, Sirs:
But much I wonder why my cranny
Should envy'd be by De-el-any;
And yet much more that half name-sake
Should join a party in the freak:
For sure I am it was not safe
Thus to abuse his better half,
As I shall prove you, Dan, to be
Divisim and conjun&tively;
For if Dan love not sherry, can
Sherry be any thing to Dan?
This is the case, whene'er you see
Dan makes nothing of sherry,
Or should Dan be by sherry o'erta'en,
Then Dan would be poor Sheridane;
'Tis hard then he should be decry'd
By Dan with Sherry by his side;
But if the case must be so hard,
That faces suffer by a card,
Let critics censure, what care I?
Backbiters only we defy,
Faces are free from injury.
In the name of Dan Jackson.
WEARY'D with saying grace and pray'r
I hasten'd down to country air,
To read your Answer, and prepare
But your fair lines so grossly flatter,
Pray do they praise me or bespatter?
I must suspect you mean the latter;
It must be so; what else, alas!
Can mean my culling of a face,
And all that stuff of toilette, glass,
But be't as 'twill, this you must grant,
That you're a daub, whilst I but paint;
Then which of us two is the quaint-
I value not your jokes of noose,
Your gibes, and all your foul abuse,
More than the dirt beneath my shoes,
Yet one thing vexes me, I own,
Thou sorry scarecrow of skin and bone!
To be call'd lean by a skeleton,
'Tis true, indeed, to curry friends, You seem to praise to make amends, And yet before your stanza ends
'Bout latent charms beneath my clothes; For every one that knows me, knows That I have nothing like my nose
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