Графични страници
PDF файл
ePub

Dr. Johnson once assumed a character in which perhaps even Mr. Boswell never saw him. His curiosity having been excited by the praises bestowed on the celebrated Torré's fireworks at Marylebone Gardens, he desired Mr. Steevens to accompany him thither. The evening had proved showery; and soon after the few people present were assembled, public notice was given that the conductors to the wheels, suns, stars, etc., were so thoroughly water-soaked that it was impossible any part of the exhibition should be made. "This is a mere excuse," says the Doctor, "to save their crackers for a more profitable company. Let us both hold up our sticks, and threaten to break those colored lamps that surround the orchestra, and we shall soon have our wishes gratified. The core of the fireworks cannot be injured; let the different pieces be touched in their respective centres, and they will do their offices as well as ever." Some young men who overheard him immediately began the violence he had recommended, and an attempt was speedily made to fire some of the wheels which appeared to have received the smallest damage; but to little purpose were they lighted, for most of them completely failed. The author of “The Rambler," however, may be considered, on this occasion, as the ringleader of a successful riot, though not as a skilful pyrotechnist.-George Steevens.

IMPATIENCE AND IRASCIBILITY.

WHEN a person was mentioned who said, "I have lived fifty-one years in this world without having had ten minutes of uneasiness," he exclaimed, "The man who says so, lies; he attempts to impose on human credulity." The Bishop of Exeter in vain observed that men were very different. His Lordship's manner was not impressive; and I learned af terward that Johnson did not find out that the person who talked to him was a prelate: if he had, I doubt not that he

would have treated him with more respect; for, once talking of George Psalmanazar, whom he reverenced for his piety, he said, “I should as soon think of contradicting a Bishop." One of the company provoked him greatly by doing what he could least of all bear, which was quoting something of his own writing against what he then maintained. "What, sir," cried the gentleman, "do you say to

"The busy day, the peaceful night,

Unfelt, uncounted, glided by ?'"

Johnson finding himself thus presented as giving an instance of a man who had lived without uneasiness, was much offended; for he looked upon such a quotation as unfair. His anger burst out in an unjustifiable retort, insinuating that the gentleman's remark was a sally of ebriety. "Sir, there is one passion I would advise you to command: when you have drunk out that glass, don't drink another." Here was exemplified what Goldsmith said of him, with the aid of a very witty image from one of Cibber's comedies: "There is no arguing with Johnson; for if his pistol misses fire, he knocks you down with the butt-end of it."-Boswell.

Last night, at the inn, when the factor in Tyr-yi spoke of his having heard that a roof was put on some part of the building at Icolmkill, I unluckily said, "It will be fortunate if we find a cathedral with a roof on it." I said this from a foolish anxiety to engage Dr. Johnson's curiosity more. He took me short at once. "What, sir? how can you talk so? If we shall find a cathedral roofed! As if we were going to a terra incognita: when everything that is at Icolmkill is so well known. You are like some New England men who came to the mouth of the Thames. 'Come,' said they, 'let us go up and see what sort of inhabitants there are here.' They talked, sir, as if they had been to go up the Susquehanna, or any other American river."Boswell.

Professors Reid and Anderson, and the two Messieurs Foulis, the Elzevirs of Glasgow, dined and drank tea with us at our inn, after which the professors went away; and I, having a letter to write, left my fellow-traveller with Messieurs Foulis. Though good and ingenious men, they had that unsettled, speculative mode of conversation which is offensive to a man regularly taught at an English school and university. I found that, instead of listening to the dictates of the sage, they had teased him with questions and doubtful disputations. He came in a flutter to me, and desired that I might come back again, for he could not bear these men. "O ho, sir," said I, "you are flying to me for refuge!" He never, in any situation, was at a loss for a ready repartee. He answered, with a quick vivacity, "It is, of two evils, choosing the least." I was delighted with this flash bursting from the cloud which hung upon his mind, closed my letter directly, and joined the company.-Boswell.

On Monday, September 22d, when at breakfast, I unguardedly said to Dr. Johnson, “I wish I saw you and Mrs. Macaulay together." He grew very angry, and, after a pause, while a cloud gathered on his brow, he burst out, "No, sir, you would not see us quarrel, to make you sport. Don't you know that it is very uncivil to pit two people against one another?" Then, checking himself, and wishing to be more gentle, he added, “I do not say you should be hanged or drowned for this, but it is very uncivil."-Boswell.

Johnson: "Madam, you often provoke me to say severe things by unreasonable commendation. If you would not call for my praise, I would not give you my censure; but it constantly moves my indignation to be applied to to speak well of a thing which I think contemptible."- Madame D'Arblay.

He expressed great indignation at the imposture of the

Cock Lane Ghost, and related with much satisfaction how he had assisted in detecting the cheat, and had published an account of it in the newspapers. Upon this subject I incautiously offended him, by pressing him with too many questions, and he showed his displeasure. I apologized, saying that "I asked questions in order to be instructed and entertained; I repaired eagerly to the fountain; but that the moment he gave me a hint, the moment he put a lock upon the well, I desisted." "But, sir," said he, "that is forcing one to do a disagreeable thing." And he continued to rate me. 'Nay, sir,” said I, “when you have put a lock upon the well, so that I can no longer drink, do not make the fountain of your wit play upon me and wet me."-Boswell.

[ocr errors]

He sometimes could not bear being teased with questions. I was once present when a gentleman asked so many-as, "What did you do, sir?" "What did you say, sir ?”—that he at last grew enraged, and said, "I will not be put to the question. Don't you consider, sir, that these are not the manners of a gentleman? I will not be baited with what and why; what is this? what is that? why is a cow's tail long? why is a fox's tail bushy?" The gentleman, who was a good deal out of countenance, said, "Why, sir, you are so good, that I venture to trouble you." Johnson: "Sir, my being so good is no reason why you should be so ill."Boswell.

I unluckily entered upon the controversy concerning the right of Great Britain to tax America, and attempted to argue in favor of our fellow-subjects on the other side of the Atlantic. I insisted that America might be very well governed, and made to yield sufficient revenue by the means of influence, as exemplified in Ireland, while the people might be pleased with the imagination of their participating of the British constitution, by having a body of representatives, without whose consent money could not be

exacted from them. Johnson could not bear my thus opposing his avowed opinion, which he had exerted himself with an extreme degree of heat to enforce; and the violent agitation into which he was thrown, while answering, or rather reprimanding me, alarmed me so, that I heartily repented of my having unthinkingly introduced the subject.

-Boswell.

Last night, when we were talking of compliments and gross speeches, Mrs. Thrale most justly said that nobody could make either like Dr. Johnson. "Your compliments, sir, are made seldom, but when they are made they have an elegance unequalled; but then, when you are angry, who dares make speeches so bitter and cruel? Dr. Johnson: Madam, I am always sorry when I make bitter speeches, and I never do it but when I am insufferably vexed." Mrs. Thrale: "Yes, sir, but you suffer things to vex you that nobody else would vex at."-Madame D'Arblay.

66

Now

He, however, charged Mr. Langton with what he thought want of judgment upon an interesting occasion. "When I was ill," said he, "I desired he would tell me sincerely in what he thought my life was faulty. Sir, he brought me a sheet of paper, on which he had written down several texts of Scripture, recommending Christian charity. And when I questioned him what occasion I had given for such an animadversion, all that he could say amounted to this-that I sometimes contradicted people in conversation. what harm does it do to any man to be contradicted?" Boswell: "I suppose he meant the manner of doing it; roughly and harshly." Johnson: "And who is the worse for that?" Boswell: "It hurts people of weaker nerves." Johnson: "I know no such weak-nerved people." Mr. Burke, to whom I related this conference, said, "It is well if, when a man comes to die, he has nothing heavier upon his conscience than having been a little rough in conversa

« ПредишнаНапред »