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Oft in my cooler recollected thought,
Thy beauties, and my fondness half forgot,
(How short those intervals for reason's aid !)
Thus to myself in anguish have I faid.
Thy vain remonftrance, foolish maid, give o'er,
Who act the wrong, can ne'er that wrong deplore.
Then sanguine hopes again delusive reign,
I form'd thee melting, as I tell my pain.
If not of rock thy fiinty heart is made,
Nor tygers nurs'd thee in the defart shade,
Let me at least thy cold compassion prove,
That slender sustenance of greedy love:
Tho'no return my warmer wishes find,
Be to the wretch, tho' not the mistress, kind;
Nor whilft I court my melancholy state,
Forget 'twas love, and thee, that wrought my fate.
Without restraint habituate to range
The paths of pleasure; can I bear this change?
Doom'd from the world unwilling to retire,
In bloom of life, and warm with young desire,
In lieu of roofs with regal splendor gay,
Condemnd in diftant wilds to drag the day ;
Where beasts of prey maintain their favage ccurt,
Or human brutes (the worst of brutes) resort.
Yes, yes, the charge I cou'd unsighing see,
For none I mourn, but what I find in thee,
There center all my woes, thy heart estrang’d,
I weep my lover, not my fortune, chang'd;
Blefs'd with thy presence, I could all forget,
Nor gilded palaces in huts regret,
But exil'd thence, superfluous is the rest,
Each place the same, my hell is in my breast;
To pleasure dead, and living but to pain,
My only sense to suffer, and complain.
As all my wrongs distressful I repeat,
Say, can thy pulse with equal cadence beat?
Can'st thou know peace? is conscience mute within ?
That upright delegate for secret fin;
Is nature so extinguish'd in thy heart,
That not one spark remains to take my part ?
Not one repentant throb, one grateful figh?
Thy breast unruffled, and unwet thy eye ?
Thou cool betrayer, temperate in ill!
Thou nor remorse, nor thought humane can't feel :
Nature has form'd thee of the rougher kind,
And education more debas'd thy mind,
Born in an age when guilt and fraud prevail,
When Justice sleeps, and Int'rest holds the scale ;
Thy loose companions a licentious crew,
Most to each other, all to us untrue,
Whom chance, or habit mix, but rarely choice,
Nor leagu'd in friendship, but in social vice,
Who indigent of honour, or of shame,
Glory in crimes which others blush to name ;
By right or wrong disdaining to be mov'd,
Unprincipled, unloving, and unlov'd.
The fair who trusts their prostituted vows,
If not their fallhood, ftill their boasts expose;
Nor knows the wifest to elude the harm,
Ev'n the whole prudence shuns the tinsel charm
They know to slander, though they fail to warm :
They make her languish in fictitious flame,
Affix fome specious siander on her name,
And baffled by her virtue, triumph o'er her fame.
These are the leaders of thy blinded youth,
These vile seducers laugh'd thee out of truth;
Whose fcurril jefts all solemn ties profane,
Or Friendship's band, or Hymen's facred chain ;
Morality as weakness they upbraid,
Nor e'en revere Religion's hallow'd head;
Alike they fpurn divine and human laws,
And treat the honest like the christian cause.
Curse on that tongue whofe vile pernicious art
Delights the ear but to corrupt the heart,
That takes advantage of the chearful hour,
When weaken'd Virtue bends to Nature's pow'r,
And would the goodness of the foul efface,
To subititute dishonour in her place.
With such you lose the day in false delights,
In lewd debauch you revel out the nights,
(O fatal commerce to Monimia's peace !)
Their arguments convince because they please;
Whilft fophiftry for reason they admit,
And wander dazzled by the glare of wit,
Wit that on ill a fpecious lustre throws,
And in false colours ev'ry object fhows,
That gilds the wrong, depreciating the right,
And hurts the judgment, while it feasts the fight ;
So in a prism to the deluded eye
Each pictur'd trifle takes a rainbow dye,
With borrow'd charms the shining prospect glows,
And truth revers'd the faithless mirror shows.
Inverted scenes in bright confusion lie,
The lawns impending o'er the nether fky;
No juft, no real images we meet;
But all the gaudy vision is deceit.
Oft I revolve in this distracted mind
Each word, each look, that spoke my charmer kind;
But oh! how dear their memory I pay!
What pleasures paft can present cares allay ?
Of all I love for ever dispossessid:
Ah! what avails to think I once was bless'd?
Hard disposition of unequal fate!
Mix'd are our joys, and transient are their date;
Nor can reflection bring them back again,
Yet brings an after-fting to ev'ry pain.
Thy fatal letters, oh immoral youth,
Those perjur'd pledges of fictitious truth,
Dear as they were no second joy afford,
My cred'lous heart once leap'd at ev'ry word,
My glowing bosom throbb'd with thick-heav'd fighs,
And foods of rapture gush'd into my eyes :
When now repeated (for thy theft was vain,
Each treasur'd syllable my thoughts retain)
Far other passions rule, and diff'rent care,
My joys and grief, my transports and despair.
Why doft thou mock the ties of constant love?
But half its joys the faithless ever prove,
They only taste the pleasures they receive,
When sure the noblest is in those we give.
Acceptance is the heav'n which mortals know,
But 'tís the bliss of angels to bestow.
Oh! emulate, my love, that talk divine,
Be thou that angel, and that heav'n be minė.
Yet, yet relent, yet intercept my fate :
Alas! I rave, and sue for new deceit.
As soon the dead shall from the grave return,
As love extinguish'd with new ardor burn.
Oh! that I dar'd to act à Roman part,
And ftab thy image in this faithful heart,
Where riveted for life fecure you reign,
A cruel inmate, author of my pain :
But coward-like irresolute I wait
Time's tardy aid, nor dare to rush on fate ;
Perhaps may linger on life's latest stage,
Survey thy cruelties, and fall by age :
No-grief shall swell my fails, and speed me o'er
(Despair my pilot) to that quiet More
Where I can trust, and thou betray no more.