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one more :" such a practice is offence;—is it not a tacit insinuation, . enough to starve a whole party! Who that you think it is absolutely necessacould enjoy a hearty meal which must ry to bribe the depravity of their palbe cut within a pound of the flesh, two ates, when you desire the pleasure of ounces of the bread, and the other pro- their company ?---that you think so portions of a fair allowance, (accord- lightly of them, that you suppose that ing to the Doctor's tables,) which such savoury sauces on your table, are more a table would present ? The very inviting attraction ihan sensible society thought would take away our appetite around it !--and that an honest man is more effectually than a full feed. Nor to be caught by a slice of mutton, as do we like his tirade against “ the com- easily as a hungry mouse is with a bit pany of bonsvivants,* with whom din- of cheese. ner is the chief business of the day~ This appears to us to be hard treatwho merely · Live to eat—who see ment of those who may fall into the the Sun rise with no other hope than kind-hearted mistake of trying to enthat they shall fill their bellies before tertain their friends as well as they it sets, who are not satisfied till they can, instead of asking them to discomare surfeited—or of those Sons of fort, and to just one person's portion Anacreon who are not entertained till more than it is calculated ought to be they are intoxicated, and who ridicu- eaten! Why might they not fancy lously maintain that the restorative that the pleasures of company would process cannot be perfectly complete not be diminished by the gratifications in old people till they feel as frisky as of the palate ; that sensible society was a four-years old.”
not likely to be made either less sensiThat the author of the Cook's Ora- ble or agreeable by the concomitant c!e, a book of inestimable instructions presence of savoury sauces; and that how to tickle the taste and provoke an honest man might really love a slice the palate, should join in the senseless of rich, tender, and juicy South Down. outcry against good living and refined To cut at the last is the unkindest cut cookery, is utterly out of place and in- of all, and we wonder that such a cruel excusable; and as for getting tipsy idea could ever have entered into the now and then, there are high authorities benevolent mind of the much-esteemed in its favour not to mention exan- author. In truth, bis sentiments on this ples.
point are precisely fit for the excuses of The Doctor says farther, that
such worldlings as treat without warmth, Nothing can be more ruinous to feast without plenty, and make show real comfort than the vulgar custom without hospitality or cordiality. of setting out a table with a parade and And there is also another financial a profusion, unsuited not only to the error in his estimates : he argues, as if circumstances of the host, but to the all that remained after guests were ennumber of the guests.
tertained, was lost, and speaks of " “ Nothing can be more fatal to TRUE whole family's suffering famine for sevHOSPITALITY, by which I mean the eral days after a dinner-party,” as a frequency with which we give our consequence of its extravagance. But friends a hearty welcome-than the this is the reverse of fact; such a family multiplicity of dishes which luxury has might have been more cheaply and made fashionable at the tables of the plainly fed; but we all know that there great, the wealthy—and the ostenta
are very pretty pickings on the days tious,—who are not seldom either after the feast, when soups are warmed great or wealthy.
up, version hashed, turkeys limbs grill“Such prodigious preparation (as ed, stews re-heated, cold joints broiled, Dominie Sampson would say) instead delicacies sought out for which there of being a compliment to our guests, is was not sufficient time in the first grand really nothing better than an indirect enterprise, puddings meliorated in the * We doubt this French ; Bons is not good.
Dutch oven, jellies and custards equal Bonvivants are good livers ; goods livers are not
to their virgin sweetness, sups of the wanted.
best vintages, and the d-l a drop of
beer preserved by crusts of bread! are confoundedly angry with him (as Nay, so well convinced are we of this, we are upon this point,) we should abthat we would not hesitate to take our hor to be like him. affidavit, as far as mere gastronomy His observations on the silly desire was concerned, in favour of the plenary of outshining one's neighbours are and calm indulgence of post-festial en very judicious; as are also those on joyments,—especially as Time being the fashionable folly of coming to dinthe eater of all things (Edax Rerum), ner long after the hours specified in we can then have our revenge and invitations. If ever this grievous catake Time to eat. But this sort of lamity is redressed, which is not propleasure, the author of the Cook's bable, it must be done by His most Oracle (of all men !) dares to call gracious Majesty, and, after him, some making a god of our bellies. Ventre of his greatest subjects, setting the exblen, as we say at Dunkirk, it is ample of sitting down within five mienough to make a critic swear. Will nutes of the appointed time with such not he allow the distinction between a guests as have arrived. We are sure glutton and an epicure-between the that the monarch who introduced such beast and the man of taste-between a reform would receive, as indeed he the foul and ravenous brute and the would merit, iufinitely more gratitude commensalist (this may be a from his people than if he originated a word) who refines upon the almost reform in Parliament.
How many most exquisite organ with which na- painful minutes are spent in waiting, ture has endowed him ? Why, what every one has felt; the “horrid half is it but the cultivation of a valuable hour” of a Briton's daily existence. sense ? A person is praised for being protracted into hours, is a visitation in one of the cognoscenti in literature, in which we have often had our unhappy painting, in sculpture, in music : and share: the sufferings of the cook in the shall be be twitted contumeliously who kitchen, and of the company (for so has raised himself above all such, by the wretched creatures are still callperfecting a sense at once conmon, de ed !) in the waiting room, are known to licate, and complicated ; and thus ren us ; the uneasiness of the entertaindering himself an amateur and profi- ers, the shifts of a conversation inadecient in the grand art scavoir vivre ! quate to dispel any gloom, the violation Away with these insults-let any one of fobs, the yawns, the impatient looks, look into his mouth and see how ad- the all which luncheonless sinners bemirably disposed it is for the impor- tray, render this a fearful epoch. And tance of its functions. Without it, life at last some blundering booby, or illmust become extinct, and it is there- dressed flirt, or empty coxcomb, walks fore a daily slave. But are we, on that in ; and a dozen of punctual, rational, account, on account of its vital utility, edacious and bibacious mortals disto debar it from every gratification ? cover, that it has been owing to this On the contrary, every good, honest, animal or thing that they shall not eat benevolent being will do more for its their victuals properly cooked, or exsatisfaction, the more he is sensible of perience the comforts which have been its services. The ruby, velvet, and prepared for them. Sincerely do we wonderful tongue; the inflexible, white, hope that His Majesty, who is a perand ivory teeth; the jaws, hung by the fect gentleman, and his ministers, who purest and most perfect mechanism; have the good luck to rule at a period and above all, the glorious palate of peace and plenty, will turn their se(furrowed by the plough of provi- rious attention to this crying abuse; dence in order to prolong its enjoy. the extent of which, and its everlasting ments) claim the consideration of the prevalence, need no comment to imwise and virtuous, and he is (we beg press the expediency of an improved pardon for declaring plainly) an ass system on legislators of feeling and who refuses to do them homage. But bowels. One instance may be enough. if we digress thus, we shall become as We dined last week where the treat desultory as our author; and when we consisted of one half tureen of bad
cold soup, cod ditto, roast beef ditto, 66. BEWARE OF 'Tis BUTS.' and some pastry which we never could 6. There are very few of my reapuff: yet were we kept from sis till ders, who if they please to reflect on near eight before the cold soup was their past lives, will not find that had ready, and the cold cod served, and the
they saved all those Little Sums, the cold beef cut, and the nasty pastry which they have spent unnecessarily, made visible. By Amphitryon, we their circumstances would be very would not have stopped so long to dine different from what they are.” with Vitellius (or his brother, we believe), who had only nine thousand There are some rules for marketing, dishes of fish and fowl in the first two which we dare say are very useful, but
By-the-by, Vitellius was a which we confess we do not underclever fellow, in spite of all that has stand: for we never went to parket been recorded of his gluttony : for any thing but for Mr. Dickinson's dead enemy always smells sweet, beautiful paper, and that was not to though an unfeeling speech, was not rap Maintenon cutlets in. Into the spoken by a fool. But we really do rest of the minutiæ we need not enter; sometimes catch the tone of the au- but we will tell our readers that, with thors we are reviewing, and—so no all its quaintness and oddity, this little more episodes.
work contains (as far as we can judge) Our worthy Doctor gives us many a great deal of information, which is pithy proverbs, and quotations from calculated to promote the kind design excellent authors—all to teach pru- of its author, and render a service to dence, economy, and order. All these, society at large. however, we will sum up in his own characteristic peroration:
THE IMPROVISATRICE. By L. E. I.
Concluded from p. 427.
One evening I had roamed beside
It was on such a night as this
Of long despair and short-lived bliss.
Unconscious where my steps might be ;
All places were alike to me :-
The whise-robed choristers were singing ;
sang while scattering the sweet store. I turned me to a distant aisle,
Where but a feeble glimmering came (Itself in darkness of the smile
Sent from the tapers' perfumed flame;
'Twas sacred to unhappy love : On it were carved a blighted pine
A broken ring—a wounded dove; And two or three brief words told all
Her history who lay beneath : "The flowers—at morn her bridal flowers,
Formed, ere the eve, her funeral wreath.'
How sweet it must be thus to die!
As life or heaven were in that sigh!
By a burst of light-a gush of song-
Poured in a gay and gorgeous throng. I could see all from where I stood.
And first I looked upon the bride ;
But, oh God! who was by her side ?
Blushing beneath her silver veil.
I saw LORENZO kneel! Methought
('Twas but a thought !) he too was pale.
Was prest to her's--I saw no more!
I sank upon the cloister floor:
From which each charm of life has fled-
In all but breath already dead.
of my neglected lyre,- the breeze Was now its mistress: music brought
For me too bitter memories !
To paint that Cretan maiden's fate,
And whom Love left so desolate.
in her vest :
Placed ever, Love! beside thy shrine;
What burning tears, false god ! are thine. Before her was the darkling sea ;
Behind the barren mountains rose-A fit home for the broken heart
To weep away life, wrongs, and woes! I had now but one hope :—that when
The hand that traced these tints was cold
LORENZO might these tints behold,
Was o’er each green veranda shining ;
Were 'mid the darker ivy twining.