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warthy soul a glass o' grog; or may- your heart, what's the use of boasting hap you would like it pure and un- when the ladies are determined to contaminated.” Joe preferred the have their own way, why, d’ye see, stuff stark naked with the jacket off, she fought for it too ; and as for and standing on the break of the rating, why she'd rate him all day poop, he held it up to mortify the long, till at last poor Joe gave in; Dutchman ; but fearing an envious and it was found one morning that he shot might crack the heart of his dar- had died in his birth, without a friendling, he turned his back by way of ly hand to close his sky-lights. I can protection, and stowed it away in his remember him when he used to sit in spirit-room in an instant. Well, d’ye the box abaft the skipper, smiling and see, we lay close alongside, locked happy as long as he could see every yard-arm and yard-arm, and hammer- one else so. After he left the Bellyed

away round and grape, great guns quekes, he was Coxswain to Tommy and small arms, till Mynheer Van Scat- P-, when he commanded the Le terbrauckens dropped the tackle-falls, Juste, and was a great favourite with mounted their pipes, and thrusting his captain. One 4th of June (that's their hands into the breeches pockets the King's birth-day--good old George of their small-clothes, showed they that's dead and gone,) all the senior had surrendered. Ah, Duncan was officers of the fleet went ashore from the boy! He was none of your but- Spithead, rigged out in full uniform, terfly gentry—only fit for a summer's to pay their respects to the comcruise. He out-Witt-ed the whole of mander-in-chief. The tide was ebb'em, conquered Winter, and hoisted ing strong out of Portsmouth harbour, his ensign as the flag of Liberty. and many of the boats landed their Mayháp, Mr. What’s-your-name, you captains upon South Sea Beach. Capt. never saw him, with his open manly P- was one of the number; and he countenance, expressive of true cour- and Joe made sail for the admiral's age and benevolence, and his curling house, through the arched gateway locks flowing gracefully over his head; under the ramparts.

Well, just as

they hauled their wind round the A furious lion in battle--so let him;

corner by the Marine Barracks, an But, duty appeased, in mercy a lamb.

immense monster of a drayman, with Yes, he'd a heart that could feel à sack of wet grains on his shoulder, for another : and there's not a Tar in

run designedly right aboard of the Greenwich moorings but reverences Captain, and plastered his gold laced his name, for he was their father and coat with sanctum smearem. This was their friend : but he's gone (as the abominably provoking ; so Tommy chaplain used to tell us, he's gone hove too, and remonstrated with the the way of all flesh, and poor Joo, fellow' on his brutality, but he only too, has lost the number of his mess. answered with a volley of curses and He was made a Boatswain before his abuse. Up comes Joe, like a first death, and then he got married; for rate with a free sheet, lightens the he said a Boatswain's warrant wan't

gemman of his cargo, and capsizes worth a rush without the parson's him without so much as by your spliced to the end on't, and no Boat- leave. Howsomever, up he roused swain could carry on duty without a again in a minute, and Joe stood all mate. But, somehow or other, it ready to strap a block with him ; but, proved a misfortunate appointment ; “hold, avast! (cried P-) the quarfor Mrs. Snatchblock, as soon as the rel's mine ; I want no man to fight commission was read, topp'd the officer for ine. As for you, y' unmannerly over him, and wanted to be Master. scoundrel, I'll- ; but come along, “ No, no, (says he) Mrs. S., every come along ;" and so he cotched hold man to his station, and the cook by of his arm, and some of the inarines the main-sheet. I've fought for my the other, and took him into the barrating, and I'll keep it." But, bless rack-vard. A ring was formed, and

21. ATHENEVU VOL. 2. 2d series,

when the fellow found 'twas in earn- lapp'd him on the nose, and that was
est, he began to mumble excuses, a cooler (one of his eyes was already
like a witch saying her prayers. “No, bunged up,) so he drew off and gave
no, (says Tommy) you insulted me in, after being soundly thrashed to his
like a blackguard, and now you shall heart's content. The captain clapped
have blackguard's play for it.” So on his rigging again, and bore up for
he unbuckles his sword, and dowses one of the officer's births, where he
his coat and hat, while the drayman got his forecastle swabb’d and his
stripped ship to bare-poles." Joe gear refitted ; and then off he set
claimed the honour of standing by again, with a comely black eye, to
this officer, and took his station wait upon the admiral. The tale was
second-him-heart-him, as they say told, and orders about to be issued
in the classics ; and a companion per- for a warrant to apprehend the man ;
formed the same office for his oppa- but Captain P— (who considered he
nent, who expected to make a mere had already received punishment
plaything of the captain, and display- enough) requested that he might be
ed his two enormous fists, like a left to his own painful roomynations
couple of sixty-eight pounders : but and the cure of his bruises. But I
he little thought who he had to deal have been spinning you a long yarn,
with. The first round the skipper Mr. What's-your-name, and all about
made him hop; for though the brewer nothing, for the barge's crew was what
was by far the more powerful man, I meant to talk about. Ah! that's the
and showed ribs like a seventy-four, subject nearest my heart; it connects
yet Tommy possessed science, and all the remembrances of early life
worked round him like a cooper and old friends. Howsomever, I shall
round a cask, making his mash-tub see you again, and then you shall
rattle again. Round after round fol- have all their histories from beginning
lowed to
great amusement of the to end.

AN OLD SAILOR.*
Royals, and the heady-fication of the

* At this dead time of the year, we take up our brewer, who began to get all in a lively “Qld Sailor” again with pleasure ; and we work, and couldn't give it vent. At dare hope that his Barge's Crew will be welcome to last, in the fourteenth round, Tommy after the classics, “ second-him heart-him.”—Ed.

FACETIÆ BIBLIOGRAPHICÆ.

OR,

Tbe Old English Desters.

OR CHANGE OF

66 And

A BAXQVET OF IEASES.

commanded him, demanded of him what CIEARE. BEING A COLLECTION OF

hee was? to whom he replyed, “I am the MODERNE JESTS

constable, and this is my watch." WITTY JEERES *

pray you, sir, for whom watch you?PLEASANT TAUNTS

saith the man. “ Marry (answered the MERRY TALES

constable,) I watch for the king." "For NEUER BEFORE IMPRINTED. LONDON, PRINT

the king ?" replyes he againe simply, ID FOR RICHARD ROYSTON, AND ARE TO BE

" then I beseech you, sir, that I may pass SOLD AT HIS SHOP IN IVIELANE NEXT rue quietly and peaceably by you to my lodg. EXCHEQUEl-orrice. 1630. Duodecimo, con- ing, for I can bring you a certificate from taining 192 pages, besides title, index, and some of my neighbours who are now in preliminary matter, 22.

towne, that I am no such man.

A Young Heire. (14.) The following extracts are taken from the first edition.

A young heire not yet come to age, but

desirous to bee suited with other gallants, Of a Country Man and a Constable. (1.) and to bee furnisht with money and com

modities to the purpose, the creditor deA simple country-man hauing terme busi- manded his bond: hee granted it conditionness in London, and being somewhat late ally, that his father should not know of it, abroad in the night, was staid by a consta therefore wisht it to bee done very priuately. ble, and somewhat harshly entreated. The Vpon this promise all things were concludpoore mau obseruing how imperiously he ed, and the time came when he should

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163

seale it. But when hee beganne to read in ter, being a gentleman, to kisse the Pope's the beginning of the bond nouerint vni- foote, I feare what part they will make me versi-Bee it knowne unto all men--he cast kisse, being but his serving man. away the bond, and absolutely refused to seale it, saying, “if it be knowne vnto all A young Master of Arts. (44.) men, how can it possibly bee, but it must

A young master of art the very next come to my father's ears ?

day after the commencement, hauing his

course to common place in the chappell, One trauelling to Rome. (22.)

where were diuers that the day before had A gentleman of England trauelling with took their degree, tooke his text out of the his man to Rome, desirous to see all fash- eighth chapter of Iob, the words were ions, but especially such rarities as were

these ; " We are but of yesterday, and there to be seene, was, by the inediation of know nothing." This text (saith he) doth some friends there resident, admitted into ftly diuide it selfe into two branches, our the Pope's presence ; to whom his holinesse standing, and our understanding ; offered his foote to kisse, which the gentle standing in these words, wee are but of man did with great submission and reue- yesterday, our vnderstanding, we know no

This his man seeing, and not be thing. forc acquainted with the like ceremony,

A Welch Reader. presently makes what speed he can to get

(116.) out of the presence; which some of the

A Welchman reading the chapter of the wayters espying, and suspecting his hast, genealogie, where Abraham begat Isaac, stayd him, and demanded the cause of his

and Isaac begat Jacob, ere he came to the so suddaine speed ; but the more they im

midst hee found the names so difficult, that portune him, the more he prest to be gone :

he broke oft in these wordsmand so they but being further vrged, he made this short begat one another till they came to the end answer-truely, saith he, this is the cause

of the chapter." of my feare, that if they compell my mas

our

rence,

ORIGINAL POETRY.

THE LILY.

I saw the eye for ever clos'd,

Where filial love so brightly shone ;-
Each soothing smilo in death repos'd,

And every gentle grace was gone.

I long'd her icy hand to kiss,

But shrunk in agony and fear :
To weep had then been almost bliss,

But, no-I could not shed a tear.

I cannot love yon gentle flow'r,

E’en though it looks so soft and fair : Its silvery hue recalls an hour

Which memory has not learn'd to bear. I hear them praise its beauteous form,

Its snowy vest, and drooping head ; And feel that once it could adorn

The clay.cold breast of CATH'RINE dead.* Then Fancy pictures all the past,

The death-bed scene, the dying groan ; The face, where beauty fled so fast;

The eye, whose every beam was flown ; The placid smile; the marble brow,

Shaded with dark and glossy hair ;
The lips, where life's last feeble glow

Had left the rose expiring there.
They deck'd with flowers the silent clay ;

With sweetest herbs the coffin drest;
In her cold hand the jasmine lay,

The Lily wither'd on ber breast. I gaz'd upon my sister's face,

And trembling stood in fear and dread : Nothing of CATH'RINE could I trace

In that pale form, so still and dead.

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* The author's elder sister, who died in the 18th year of her age.

5

LOCAL SUPERSTITIONS.

Oh monstrous--ob strange-we are haunted! the foot of which he was found sense-
Pray, masters, fly-masters, belp!-Mid. Night's Dr. less next morning.
THERE is something good humor-
ed in Irish superstition-some-

King Finvar's* Cattle. thing qui donne de la joie dans la Between this mountain and the peur. We have no witches-none of river Shannon there is a small lake, those ugly, ill favoured, earthly reali- concerning which a very extraordinary ties, which brutalize and stupify the report was circulated a few years minds of a portion of our own boors; back. Some people indeed may but there is scarce a hill, a lough, á imagine it a little too improbable to dingle, a fort, or an old ruin, which lend a very ready credence to it, but does not call up within the peasant's I can assure them that its veracity mind some wild and poetically fearful was not even questioned at the time association.

it took place. The lake or lough to Knuck Fierna.

which I allude is a very pretty one,

although it is disfigured on one side The hill of the fairies. This is the by a piece of ugly bog. On the East, loftiest mountain in the county of Lim- it is overlooked by a hill which makes erick, and lifts its double peak on a very sudden descent on its bank ; the Southern side, pretty accurately, but the slope is delightfully covered I believe, dividing it from Cork. with mountain ash, birch, and hazel Numberless are the tales related of trees, so as to form a very pleasant this hill by the carmen who have been contrast to the dreary flat opposite. benighted near it on their return from At the northern end of the water, the latter city, which is the favourite among patches of rude crag, and ocmarket for the produce of their dai- casional spots of green, a few thatched ries. That there is a Siobrug or fairy hovels or cabins are huddled together, castle in the Mount, no one in his so as to form a something indescribasenses presumes to entertain a doubt. bly miserable in appearance, which is On the summit of the highest peak is dignified with the appellation of a vilan unfathomable well, which is held lage: it is called Killimicat. Not in very great veneration by the pea- very far from this, and on the borders santry. It is by some supposed to of the lake-But what are these stobe the entrance to the court of their ries worth if taken out of the mouth tiny mightinesses. A curious fellow of the original narrator? I shall give at one time had the hardihood to cast this to you as I had it myself:-“ You a stone down the orifice ; and then see that little meadow there overcasting himself on his face and hands, right us, Sir,—that was the little spot and leaning over the brink, waited to that Morty Shannon took from the ascertain the falsity of this supposition master. Morty was a snug sculog by the reverberation, which he doubt- then, and very well to do there, as I ed not would soon be occasioned by hear; but a stronger man than he the missile reaching the bottom. But was could not stand any thing of a he met with a fate scarcely less tragi- loss in such times as they were. cal than that of poor Pug, who set Morty wondered what was it that fire to the match of a cannon, and used to spoil the growth of his meadow. then must needs run to the mouth to There was no sign of trespass from see the shot go off. Our speculator the neighbours, for the bounds were had his messenger returned to him good, and their cattle were all spanwith a force that broke the bridge of celled. But so it was : sorrow bit of his nose,

locked

up both his eyes, grass did he ever cut on the field for and sent him down the hill at the rate of four furlongs per second, at

* A famous fairy monarch.

two years. At last, knowing it to be a dry summer. This report is quite a good bit of ground, he resolved to as well attested as the other. sit up of a night to see what was used

Old Raths. to be there: and so he did, himself

These very ancient places are a faand his two sons. About twelve

vourite haunt of the elves; and woe o'clock, as they were standing, as it might be this way, what should they the axe or the spade to tree, shrub,

to the hardy man who dares to apply see rising out of the lake only a fine

or soil, in these hallowed spots. They big cow and seven heifers, and they making towards his little field. Tha the face of the country, and form

are very numerously scattered over guthine !' says Morty to himself, is this the way of it?' So he beckoned of land holders, who have acquired wit

great eye-sores to the improving class to his sons to come betune them and enough to contemn the superstition, the lake, and turn them into the but lack courage to adventure first in pound. The old cow

seen what they the cause of common sense. were about, and, without ever spaking

one stout man who lost an eye in the a word, made a dart right between the two sons and into the water with attempt to root out an old thorn on her. But the heifers they drove home, bad a fine meadow turned up and

one of these places ; another who and inclosed them in a paddock, destroyed for his pains; and a third, where they staid for a year ; until who declared that the very night after one evening the gorsoon forgot to he had superintended an exploit of a lock the gate, when they all made off

similar kind, he saw three siteogs, in into the lake, and were never heard

the shape of strapping bucaughs, take of more."

each a cleave of turf from the reek in It is said that there is a magnificent front of his house. The reality of this palace under this water, one of whose latter appearance I was not at all inturrets is visible above the surface in clined to question.

0.

I knew

to 66

ENGLISH OPERA. The almost unequalled success of Der performer, the letters having got exchangFreischutz having thrown the novelties pre- ed, the American, on his arrival, is taken pared for this Theatre a little into arrear, for the Post-Boy, and “ wicey wasey."" the Proprietor favoured us with two new Here, in the Alderman's family, we are fa. pieces on the same evening - Jonathan in voured with some amusing equivoque, until England, and The Frozen Lake ; the for the mystery is cleared up, and the characmer the acknowledged production of Mr. ters and persons of Jonathan and the PosPeake, and the latter attributed, and we tillion satisfactorily identified. Mathews, believe correctly, to Mr. Planche. Jonalhan for whom the piece was expressly written, in England, as its title implies, contains laboured hard for its success, and threw the adventures of that entertaining charac- all his little comicalities with great effect ter during a visit to this country. He is into the part of Jonathan ; but the princifirst introduced to us at Liverpool, accom- pal deficicncy is a want of something to do. panied by his Nigger, whom he is anxious The phraseology of the character we are

swop for a pony," or dispose of for a already familiarized to, and so far the novcertain number of dollars. Here he de- elty of the thing is a little worn off. It livers his “ uncle Ben's” letter of introduce required therefore to be strengthened by a tion, and after getting turned out of the certain number of ludicrous or ingenious se“Waterloo Hotel,” for smoking, and brawl. lections to render it additionally entertain. ing with his sable attendant, and meeting ing, and as these are but sparingly supplied with some very absurd and improbable ad. by the author, the effect is not exactly what ventures at another inn to which he has

we bad anticipated, and Jonathan's adventhought proper to retire, procures a further

tures are, upon the whole, far from satisfacrecommendation and starts for the metro tory. The best attempt at character in the polis. It so bappens, however, that the piece, is that of the "swan-hopping Aldersame gentleman who has recommended man ;” and the American's interview with our friend Jonathan to Alderman Gross. the City knight, who is himself a bit of a feeder, has also sent him a postillion, one wag, is very diverting. Keeley had a Natty Larkspur, who is anxious to succeed whimsical little part assigned him, which to the “ vacant saddle" of his predecessor; he played with his accustomed naivete; and in the confusion which took place at but the mistakes arising from his intrusion the inn, in which Natty was a principal into the traveller's bed-room, have been

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