It cancels all defects," and in their place
Finds fenfe in Brownlow, charms in lady Grace;
It guides the fancy, and directs the mind;
No bankrupt ever found a fair-one kind.
So truly Horoscope its virtues knows,
To this lov'd idol 'tis, alone, he bows;
And fancies fuch bright heraldry can prove,
The vile Plebeian but the third from Jove.
Long has he been of that amphibious fry,
Bold to prescribe, and busy to apply.
His fhop the gazing vulgar's eyes employs
With foreign trinkets, and domestic toys.
Here mummies lay most reverendly stale;
And there the tortoife hung her coat of mail;
Not far from fome huge Shark's devouring head
The flying fish their finny pinions fpread ;
Aloft in rows large poppy-heads were ftrung,
And near, a fcaly alligator hung;
In this place, drugs in mufty heaps decay'd;
In that, dry'd bladders and drawn teeth were laid.
An inner room receives the numerous fhoals
Of fuch as pay to be reputed fools.
Globes ftand by globes, volumes on volumes lie,
And planetary schemes amuse the eye.
The fage, in velvet chair, here lolls at cafe,
To promife future health for prefent fees;
Then, as from tripod, folemn fhame reveals,
And what the stars know nothing of, foretels.
One afks how foon Panthea may be won,
And longs to feel the marriage-fetters on
VOL. I.
Others, convinc'd by melancholy proof,
Enquire when courteous fates will strike them off.
Some, by what means they may redrefs their wrong,
When fathers the poffeffion keep too long.
And fome would know the iffue of their caufe,
And whether gold can folder up its flaws.
Poor pregnant Lais his advice would have,
To lofe by art what fruitful Nature gave ;
And Portia, old in expectation grown,
Laments her barren curfe, and begs a fon :
Whilft Iris his cofmetic wath would try,
To make her bloom revive, and lovers die.
Some ask for charms, and others philtres choose,
To gain Corinna, and their quartans lose.
Young Hylas, botch'd with stains too foul to name,
In cradle here renews his youthful frame:
Cloy'd with defire, and furfeited with charms,
A hot-house he prefers to Julia's arms.
And old Lucullus would th' arcanum prove,
Of kindling in cold veins the fparks of love.
Bleak Envy thefe dull frauds with pleafure fees, 16. And wonders at the fenfelefs myfteries.
In Colon's voice fhe thus calls out aloud
On Horoscope environ'd by the croud :
Forbear, forbear, thy vain amufements ceafe,
Thy woodcocks from their gins awhile release;
And to that dire misfortune liften well,
Which thou should't fear to know, or I to tell.
'Tis true, thou ever wast esteem'd by me
The great Alcides of our company.
When we with noble fcorn refoly'd to cafe
Oarfelves from all parochial offices;
And to our wealthier patients left the care
And draggled dignity of fcavenger;
Such zeal in that affair thou didst exprefs,
Nought could be equal, but the great fuccefs.
Now call to mind thy generous prowess past,
Be what thou should'st, by thinking what thou waft: The faculty of Warwick-lane defign,
If not to ftorm, at leaft to undermine.
Their gates each day ten thousand night-caps croud,
And mortars utter their attempts aloud.
If they fhould once unmask our mystery,
Each nurfe, ere long, would be as learn'd as we;
Our art expos'd to every vulgar eye;
And none, in complaifance to us, would die.
What if we claim their right t' affaffinate,
Muft they needs turn apothecaries ftraight?
Prevent it, Gods! all ftratagems we try,
To croud with new inhabitants your sky.
'Tis we who wait the Deftinies' command,
To purge the troubled air, and weed the land.
And dare the college infolently aim
To equal our fraternity in fame?
Then let crabs-eyes with pearl for virtue try,
Or Highgate-hill with lofty Pindus vie;
So glow-worms may compare with Titan's beams,
And Hare-court pump with Aganippe's streams.
Our manufactures now they meanly fell,
And their true value treacherously tell;
Nay, they difcover too, their spite is fuch,
That health, than crowns more valued, coft not much;
Whilft we must steer our conduct by thefe rules,
To cheat as tradesmen, or to starve as fools.
At this fam'd Horoscope turn'd pale, and straight In filence tumbled from his chair of ftate: The croud in great confusion fought the door, And left the Magus fainting on the floor; Whilft in his breast the fury breath'd a storm, Then fought her cell, and re-affum'd her form. Thus from the fore although the infect flies, It leaves a brood of maggots in difguife. Officious Squirt in hafte forfook his shop, To fuccour the expiring Horofcope. Oft' he effay'd the Magus to restore, By falt of Succinum's prevailing power; Yet ftill fupine the folid lumber lay, An image of fcarce-animated clay; Till Fates, indulgent when disasters call, By Squirt's nice hand apply'd a urinal. The wight no fooner did the steam receive, But rouz'd, and blefs'd the ftale restorative. The fprings of life their former vigour feel; Such zeal he had for that vile utenfil.
So when the great Pelides Thetis found,
He knew the fea-weed fcent, and th' azure Goddess own'd. VARIATIONS.
Ver. 202. Whilft we, at our expence, must perfevere, And for another world, be ruin'd here.
LL night the fage in penfive tumults lay,
Complaining of the flow approach of day;
Oft' turn'd him round, and ftrove to think no more
Of what thrill Colon faid the day before.
Cowflips and poppies o'er his eyes he fpread,
And Salmon's works he laid beneath his head.
But those blefs'd opiates ftill in vain he tries,
Sleep's gentle image his embraces Alies:
Tumultuous cares lay rolling in his breast,
And thus his anxious thoughts the Sage expreft.
Oft' has this planet roll'd around the fun,
Since to confult the fkies I first begun :
Such my applaufe, fo mighty my fuccefs,
Some granted my predictions more than guess.
But, doubtful as I am, I'll entertain
This faith, there can be no mistake in gain.
For the dull world must honour pay to thofe,
Who on their understanding most impose.
Firft man creates, and then he fears the elf;
Thus others cheat him not, but he himfelf;
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